Divided mind
by Mavisbaron
Summary: Most things will be okay eventually, but not everything will be. Sometimes you'll put up a good fight and lose. Sometimes you'll hold on really hard and realise there is no choice bu to let go. Acceptance is a small quiet room and grief is the ocean surrounding it.
1. Chapter 1

_A girl was running down the streets of Hemlock Grove. Her long legs in a full on sprint. Unattractive sweat forming on her face and her hair sticking to her face. Couldn't tell if it was tears of just the sweat dripping down her cheeks as she ran. The girl fell to the ground looking up to see a white wolf ripping the heart out of a man. He was faceless. The girl unrecognisable. All that could be heart in the night fall and tragedy was the wolf growling and running away as the girl watched her screamed and crying filling the air. She ran over to the man without a face clutching him crying on him. Desperation and cries of bargaining. She wanted him back. Wanted him alive._

A loud scream could be heard as she woke up. Sweat dripping from her forehead. A pale hand went up to wipe the sweat away from her forehead as she swung her long tanned legs out of bed groaning and getting up walking to her bathroom stripping her oversized jumper off her body and climbing into the shower. Looking down at the dirt being washed off her body she groaned in annoyance scrubbing it off for her first day of school. When her shower was done she'd dried herself off getting her hairdryer and dried her long dirty blonde hair until it was wavy and dry. She applied her makeup and then walked off to get dressed in her clothes. Placing her boots on she walked downstairs grabbing an apple from the kitchen counter and placing it in her backpack as she was on her way out and then walking getting into her black Camaro speeding off to school. Getting out of the car she placed her round sunglasses on walking into school. Walking up the stairs she looked around seeing her childhood friend Roman Godfrey. He was a beautiful man. His eyes probably the most entrancing thing about him. She walked up to him sitting down next to him. He handed her a cigarette which she lit and took a long drag from. He had already been smoking his own placing it between his plump lips taking a drag before he spoke to her.

"You didn't answer last night." Roman muttered annoyed and over-protective. They'd been friend since they were 2 years old. Their families worked together often. Her mother worked in accounting and sometimes legal. All she could do was chuckle at his over-protective nature and took another drag of her cigarette blowing out the smoke looking over to him with a shrug. He'd always had a habit of never letting the girls in his life have any freedom if he loved them.

"Didn't notice you called." She stated simply with a taunting smirk. Roman looked over at her worried and then rolled his eyes at her.

"I thought you were hurt." Roman dramatized making her laugh loudly getting up.

"Fuck off Roman. If I wanted a boyfriend I'd get one." She put it simply with a small snicker before walking off walking up the stairs and into school. Looking into her locker she was searching for something when she felt a tap on her shoulder. Turning around her blue eyes analysed the figure in front of her. An overly hairy teenager with a leather jacket.

"You are blocking the entrance to my locker." The hairy teen informed her seemingly uncomfortable. She chuckled moving her books throwing them into her locker. "Petar Rumancek" He introduced himself.

"Estelle Tregetour" She introduced herself a small smile playing at her lips as she outstretched her hand. Petar smiled nodding and shaking her hand.

"Pleasure to meet you" He spoke kindly.

"I honestly can't say the same. You reek of wet dog." Estelle taunted with a fake smile before pushing past him to class. After school she drove home and walked inside walking up to the kitchen cleaning the dishes and cooking bacon for dinner she then placed it on the kitchen counter waiting for her mother to show up. An hour later and cold bacon which Estelle had placed in the warmer her mother ran into the house taking off her heels and walking over to Estelle with a smile.

"Sorry I'm late darling. Looks lovely um here is the shopping list." Her mother handed her a list sitting down and eating the bacon. Estelle nodded taking it and folding it placing it in her purse.

"Where's Finn?" Estelle inquired speaking about her little brother. He was only a couple months old right now. Her mother looked up at her wide eyed and cursing herself.

"Fucking shit I forgot to pick him up" Her mother cursed loudly. Estelle sighed deeply looking over at her mother for a moment.

"Um it's okay mum. I'll run a bath for you and you can relax. I'll pick Finn up." Estelle informed her mother helping her upstairs drawing w bath with the bubbles and bath salts. Estelle rubbed her eyes seeing colours floating around her mother consisting of brown and green she took a deep sigh walking out of the house and grabbing her winter coat putting it on and tying up her boots before walking into the car and driving off to the day care. When she got there she ran inside of the day care noticing it was still open but her eyes strayed to the distance. She saw two ghosts fighting. Beating the shit out of each other. Estelle shook it off walking inside and giving the ladies a sad smile. "I'm sorry. My mother, she just spaced. She had a busy day at work I am so sorry." Estelle apologised grabbing Finn and holding him close handing over some money to them.

"It's fine don't do it again. We have lives as well." One of the ladies cussed walking out of the day care and Estelle followed soon after walking over to the car and sitting Finn down in the passenger seat driving home. She then fed Finn before putting him to sleep and going to check on her mother who was asleep and going to sleep after doing her homework.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day the news going around the school was that Brooke Bluebell was killed. Mauled by an animal. Estelle strutted into school tired and bumped into Petar as she turned the corner. Looking up she rubbed her eyes tiredly and pursed her lips.

"Sucks huh? That everyone thinks you did it werewolf." Estelle teased nudging him and walking with him. Petar rolled his eyes annoyed.

"I prefer sexy man beast. Did you know her?" Petar asked as the two walked up to the stairs. Estelle chuckled.

"Beer pong partner. Other than the fact I'll have to find a new partner I'm not sad she's gone. No reason pretending." Estelle shrugged uncaringly she then noticed Petar's blue eyes straying up the stairwell. She followed his life of gaze seeing Roman who was in a drug deal at the moment. Estelle scoffed. "Good luck with your man crush." Estelle teased patting his chest turning around and walking upstairs. When she got up the stairs she noticed Roman leaning off the railing looking down. Estelle grinned to herself running up to him and nudging him making him nearly fall.

"Fuck! Really Estelle?" Roman cursed looking over at Estelle's beaming face. She then took the joint taking a drag from it.

"You going to the visual tonight?" Estelle asked out of curiosity. Roman shook his head standing up following her to class. "Well come to mine. Finn is dying to see you again you know how much he loves you." Estelle teased with a small laugh. Roman rolled his eyes.

"Sure. I think Petar killed that girl. What do you think?" Roman asked out of the blue. Estelle chuckled rolling her eyes.

"I think I really couldn't give a shit." Estelle stated dryly and then turned away from him walking into class. When Estelle got home walking into the kitchen for a drink she noticed Finn crying up in his bedroom. Estelle ran upstairs noticing Finn's room stuck like shit. She went and changed him before giving Finn a bath and then feeding him and putting him to sleep. When her mother showed up she ran a hand through her hair looking over to Estelle.

"Thank you for taking care of Finn. I'll be away for a few days. I have a conference meeting over in Paris. I promise I'll be back next week. My plane leaves in an hour. I have to go. Bye darling." Her mother bid her farewell kissing Estelle's cheek and then walking out driving off to the airport. Estelle walked over to Finn placing him in his highchair in the kitchen as she cooked her dinner. A knock came at her door and Estelle walked over to it opening it and seeing Roman and she let him in and he walked all the way over to Finn picking him up bopping him up and down. Estelle smiled.

"You know he loves you right?" Estelle inquired laughing lightly. Roman nodded.

"Of course it just makes this sweeter." Roman flirted looking her up and down. Estelle rolled her eyes going back to cooking. Roman walked up behind her having put Finn down for a nap and his hands instinctively went around her stomach under her shirt. His hands moved up slowly as he leaned down going to kiss her neck but Estelle pushed him away smirking over at him.

"Sorry Roman but you know my rules. No sex if you want to be friends." Estelle teased nudging him and then placing food on a plate and sitting down as the two ate. Roman took a few joints out of his pocket and some cocaine handing it to her. Estelle took it and pocketed it.

"You know one day I am going to collect the debt you owe me. I'll see you around." Roman bid his farewell kissing under her jaw making her tilt her head back before he got up walking out. The next day in school Estelle was sitting down near her locker when Letha walked up to her with a small smile.

"Hi Estelle, you know that guy everyone thinks is a werewolf? He was listening in like a perv on the girl's bathroom. It was so gross." Letha cringed looking over down the halls. Estelle rolled her eyes slamming her book shut and got up looking down at Letha.

"So is your cousin but you never have anything bad to say to him? I'll see you around Letha good talk. Ten out of ten." Estelle gave her thumbs up patting her on the shoulder and a headache formed in Estelle's mind as she saw something off.

 _Letha got out of bed, she was glowing. Her head turned towards someone who looked something like an angle. He had his arms open around his golden glowing wings. The figure all dark._

Estelle nodded to Letha confused and walked down the hall walking into the bathroom noticing Roman and another girl walking out of the bathroom stall. Roman went and washed his hands as Estelle touched up her eye makeup. She rolled her eyes looking over at Roman. "I need you still have a type." Estelle teased looking at the girl glaring at her as she walked out. Roman chuckled slightly shaking his head leaning against the sinks.

"We still on for tomorrow night?" Roman asked her avoiding the comments.

"Sure. Like I'm going to miss a time for your rich ass to treat lower middle class me." Estelle teased grabbing a cigarette packet from his blazer pocket and taking one out lighting it taking a drag. "I guess I'll see you later." Estelle said slowly looking up at him with a smile before walking out of the bathroom. That night Estelle got ready for the Halloween homecoming dance. She dressed herself as Pocahontas


	3. Chapter 3

She waited patiently until a knock came at the door and she walked up opening it and smiled seeing Nancy who was a mother that lived next door. "He's a cute little bumblebee. Thank you for taking him trick or treating." Estelle thanked Nancy giving her a pram with Fin in it. Nancy smiled looking over at her.

"It's okay Estelle. He is so adorable. Is the father living here?" Nancy asked confusing Estelle with a teen parent.

"No because my mother ran away from him as soon as she got knocked up. I'm not the mother." Estelle stated plainly slightly hurt. Nancy looked at her wide eyed and regretful.

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to I'm sorry." Nancy stumbled. Estelle chuckled walking out of the house locking it up.

"It's okay Nancy. Hymen still in tack." Estelle informed Nancy with a nod and she then walked downstairs and turned to Nancy. "I'll pick him up tomorrow is that okay?" Estelle asked her holding the keys to her car.

"Yes of course. IN the morning please." Nancy asked and Estelle nodded in understanding getting in her car and driving off. When she got to school walking up the steps and into the gym. Valerie ran over to her wrapping her arms around Estelle's waist and pulling her to the dance floor. Estelle turned around swaying her hips dancing with Valerie grinding against her. Valerie wrapped her arms around Estelle's neck as they danced and Estelle's hands went to Valerie's waist pulling her closer the two dancing intimately. Roman then walked up to her wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her with him to dance. Roman's whole body bopped up and down as his hands went to clutch her face as her eyes closed swaying to the music. Roman's hand moved down her back slowly and she opened her blue eyes to meet his and he poked his tongue out showing her ecstasy. Estelle smirked up at him bringing him down their lips meeting for a moment as Estelle swallowed the pill and then moved away from him going back to dancing with Valerie. A while later the music was stopped and everyone looked over to the stage.

"Attention I need your attention. Please maintain order and move to the nearest exit" Just as the principal was about to finish his sentence everyone screamed running for the exit. Estelle walked over to Valerie.

"My place is free we can finish off there." Estelle informed Valerie linking their arms and walking off and Ashely soon walked up to them and the three messaged some of their friends and the girls drove away in Estelle's car all the way to Estelle's home. Estelle turned her music speakers up loudly and the crowd of teens all danced and did whatever they wanted. Estelle was sitting on her porch smoking when Ashley came and sat beside her with a smile.

"You doing alright pretty?" Ashley teased nudging her. Estelle chuckled offering Ashely a smoke to which she declined.

"I'm fine. Never was one for a party." Estelle shared with a shrug. Ashley laughed.

"I know. Every time the party starts you're drinking or smoking by yourself. Your mum leave again?" Ashley asks pouring herself a drink from the bottle Estelle had perched on the top stair. Estelle shrugged with a deep sigh.

"For a week. Her week goes for a month. She's a good mother. She just wants to provide for my family." Estelle defended her family making Ashley laugh.

"You know the fact you have to say your family when referring to your mother makes it obvious you don't think of her like a daughter would their mother. Sort out your shit and come party." Ashley cheered grabbing Estelle bringing her inside and Estelle laughed loudly dancing with Ashley. In the morning Estelle woke up next to Ashley and naked and groaned sitting up and Ashley sat up as well cracking her neck.

"You can see yourself out." Estelle informed Ashley getting up putting some clothes on and then walking downstairs getting her backpack and an apple and walking next door knocking on the door. Nancy opened it and handed her Finn and the bag. "Thank you for looking after him." Estelle thanked Nancy with the worst headache she'd ever had.

"Just a word or warning invest in aspirin if you are going to rage like you did last night." Nancy spat slamming the door shut. Estelle took a deep breath and walked back down to her car driving Finn to day care and then driving to school and walked into her English class late. Handing a note to the teacher and sitting down in her usual seat she leaned back opening her book. The English teacher then went back to droning on reading the book Weathering Heights to them. To say Estelle hated the book would be an understatement. A bit later Roman threw a scrunched up piece of paper over to Petar and the teacher saw.

"Passing notes Mr Godfrey?" She asked him looking over her big nose to him.

"Wouldn't dream of it Mam" Roman beamed up at her charming her. She then continued. After class she walked out as quickly as she could but her teacher called her in and as she walked back in Roman chuckled slinging an arm around her shoulder leaning in close. "I'll say something nice at your funeral." Roman teased before walking out. Estelle walked back in and smiled over to her teacher.

"Please sit down. Now Miss Tregetour I wanted to talk to you about your dropping grades. They are starting to become an issue. Is there anything I need to know?" Her teacher asked looking at her with curious eyes. Estelle looked down for a moment sitting down and then looking back up to her teacher.

"No Mam I've just been busy. You know life gets in the way." Estelle shrugged answering her with a polite smile. Her teacher looked at her unconvinced.

"What do you want out of life? You don't have long until you are out of school what are your plans?" Her teacher asked packing her belongings up. Estelle pursed her lips leaning back thinking about it. After a long moment of thinking she leaned forward looking up at her teacher with her mouth ajar.

"I guess I'll look after Finn, my little brother, make sure my mother actually comes home every once and a while. Maybe I'll meet a nice guy who can look after me. We'll be blissfully in love and I'll be a stay at home mum with the rug rats. I'll be a great mother. I'll probably end up moving out of here. If I get enough money move away with Finn. He's only a few months old. That's it. No hardships, no tragedy. Just easy." Estelle explained to her teacher with a plain shrug.

"From what I've seen you can do so much more than what you aspire for. Life has a way of getting in the way. So I urge you to get your grades up and just put the idea of being a parent out of your head for a while. That's all oh and I want to have a meeting with your mother any time she is in town." Her teacher informed her before walking off and Estelle soon followed. Walking out into the halls she walked to her locker seeing Petar there and opening her locker. Petar looked over to her with a small smile.

"Hi Estelle how you doing?" Petar asked her politely. Estelle chuckled.

"I'm alive, that should say it all. I'll see you around sexy man beast." Estelle teased shaking her body laughing and he smirked watching her walk away. She walked down the stairs to her car driving off picking up her little brother and taking him to the park for a playdate. She walked up to the benches watching her little brother until a lady came and sat next to her.

"Hi darling. Um do you have a convenient time where Finn and Sally have a playdate? I am free all day every day. I'm free every day apart from Sunday." The lady informed her and Estelle looked at her phone checking her calendar.

"Um I'm sorry but I'm full with my part time job, school and study group. Uh how about you take Finn to church and then the two can play together after and I can pick Finn up later. How is that?" Estelle asked the lady kindly. The lady nodded in agreement.


	4. Chapter 4

_Christina was walking through the woods looking around with a peaceful face until she stopped looking at a mauled corpse. Dropping everything she was holding Christina looked at the body shocked her mouth open ajar not knowing if she should believe it or not. Christina then pursed her lips looking around and walking forward to the body and kneeling down kissing it and then screaming noticing it was actually dead not fake._

Estelle shot up her face sweating. Wiping off her sweating forehead and getting out of bed walking over to the basin and washing herself and walking downstairs pouring herself a glass of cold water drinking it up and then she washed the glass and walking back up to her bedroom looking herself in the mirror noticing the unsightly bags under her eyes from lack of sleep since forever. She'd been meaning to see a doctor about. Turning back to her bed she took a tranquiliser that Roman had given her before falling back to sleep. In the morning she woke to the screams of Finn. Estelle stumbled out of her bed running for Finn's room noticing he wasn't screaming anymore she grabbed her knife and walked into the room and gave a sigh of relief noticing it was Roman sitting there with Finn in his hands bopping him up and down. Estelle walked over to him with a kind smile.

"Thank you for looking after him Roman. What are you doing here?" Estelle asked tiredly knowing she looked like a mess. Roman smiled up at her.

"Stopping by. Thought I'd give you a ride to school. I was driving by when I saw your car was being towed." Roman informed her nonchalantly. Estelle looked over at him and ran a hand through her hair angrily.

"Shit, um thanks Roman. I'll need you to drive Finn to day care. Just wait for me to get ready." Estelle sighed tiredly again yawning and going to walk out when Roman walked up to her having put Finn down again and he reached out for her shoulder.

"You been having those psychotic nightmares again?" Roman asked sternly.

"They never stopped Roman. Look I promise I'll go and see a doctor soon." Estelle stated going to walk again but Roman stopped her.

"You said that two years ago. Never happened. But fine. I'll get Finn ready." Roman informed her being helpful. Estelle nodded gratefully and going to shower and clean herself putting her makeup on and clothes on she then walked downstairs and saw that Roman had made her lunch which she placed in her bag and Roman drove Finn to the day care and her to school.

"Thank you Roman" Estelle smiled to him and then she walked into school and had a meeting with the guidance councillor. After discussing her school options and future she finally got out of the office and walked to her AP biology class. Sitting next to her friend Valerie the two worked together on their assignment. As the two walked out of the class when it was finished they walked out of school.

"When are you free to work together on this?" Valerie asked wide eyed. Estelle groaned.

"Um I don't know if I have any free time. Look you give me my half and I'll do it whenever I can." Estelle tried to juggle it all.

"Where are you going?" Valeria asked almost outraged. Estelle turned back to Valerie with pursed lips.

"I'm sorry I have a doctor's appointment to get to. I'll be back for calculus." Estelle assured Valeria who looked at her unimpressed as Roman began walking towards them and Valerie looked at her disgusted.

"Have fun fucking the player who'll put your virgin ass as another notch on his bedpost." Valerie yelled at her before turning and walking away. Estelle watched her leave and looked down guilty before over to Roman hopping in the car. The doctor's appointment ended in her getting heavy sleeping pills and stabilisers to calm her down right before she slept. Later that night a knock came at Estelle's door and went to open is showing Christina standing there and she walked in.

"I'll give you the money later on tonight. Thanks for doing this Christina." Estelle thanked her with a grateful smile and Christina nodded kindly.

"It's good I mean Finn is such a cute baby. Hey um can I ask you something?" Christina questioned looking at her curious. Estelle turned looking at her.

"Sure what?" Estelle asked.

"Why do you treat Finn as your child when it's actually your mothers?" Christina inquired. Estelle picked up her heels and placed them in her bag.

"Because I don't want Finn growing up alone. Bye." Estelle finalised and then walked out of the house and into her car driving off to a nightclub putting on her heels and changing into her cocktail dress before walking over to the line and walking into the club in there she met up with her friend Alek and she jumped on him kissing the top of his head curly black hair messing in her face. The rest of the night she spent partying with him until he drove her home helping her into her bed and walking away and driving home. When the morning came around Estelle walked downstairs with a hangover and handed Christina some money before pampering Finn for the rest of the morning until Roman came over to hers and then he drove her to his house and she walked in with Finn on her hips and Olivia noticed her looking over at her with a scrunched up face. "Do I smell or something?" Estelle asked confused. Roman chuckled.

"No you smell like vanilla. It's nice. Shelly is in her room waiting." Roman informed her. Estelle nodded with a grin walking to the elevator and over into Shelly's room playing with Finn with her. Estelle then walked downstairs ready to leave the house when she saw Petar and Roman and she tripped on the carpet bumping into Roman and Petar caught her and Finn and flashes in her mind shone. He was a werewolf, she saw then digging up a body and she looked between them two her mouth ajar.

"I heard you guys planning on digging up a body!" Estelle yelled hitting Roman who looked at her wide eyed.

"How did you know?" Roman exclaimed.

"You told me" Estelle accused him and he looked at her confused.

"No I did not." Roman defended himself.

"Well I heard you!" Estelle called out furious. "Well now that you told me I have to join. Could be fun." Estelle stated with a wide grin and she then grabbed Roman and he drove her home. Two days later Estelle was finished school and walked up to Valerie who looked at her annoyed.

"What the hell do you want?" She sneered at Estelle who let out a loud sigh.

"I know you don't like me being friends with Roman but I am so get the fuck over it. You are still my best friend. So get the fuck over it. Can you come look after Finn tonight or get him to stay at yours I'm busy with work." Estelle informed her with a tired sigh.

"Fine but only because Finn is as cute as a kitten." Valerie stated with a frown walking past her and then hugging her tightly and walking away. Estelle laughed to herself going to her car and she texted Roman saying she'd be at his later tonight. When she got there she held shovels up.

"Since you find it painful to look for shovels in the kingdom." Estelle teased pushing them into him and walking over to the kitchen. She then poured herself a glass of whiskey and turned to Roman who was glaring at her.

"Who'd you hear about the grave digging?" Roman inquired confused.

"I don't know. I just bumped into you two and saw…everything." Estelle shared sternly looking down at the ground and Roman nodded understandingly.

"Cause that's normal" Roman muttered sarcastically and he then went up to change. When he came down he walked with Estelle to his car. "Did you seriously have to come? You could get sick or something?" Roman tried to stop her from going. Estelle chuckled taking the passenger seat.

"Name the last time I got sick?" Estelle challenged him and Roman laughed shaking his head.

"Right I forgot who I was talking to." Roman hoked. When they got to the graveyard the two climbed out of the car and Estelle lit a cigarette and followed Roman to where Peter would be. Roman looked around throwing the shovels over the fence and helping Estelle over and then jumping over himself he looked down at her proudly.

"Giant" Estelle scowled crossing her arms holding her leather jacket closer to her so she could be warm. Roman then placed an elbow on her head and smirked down at her.

"Well you see it's just the amazing ones that get to be tall." Roman teased her grabbing her waist throwing her around. She pushed him away and continuing walking taking a drag of her cigarette. They then made their way over to Peter not bothering to keep quiet. Once they made it over there Peter stood up looking the up and down.

"Did you actually dress up as a grave robber?" Peter teased Roman laughing loudly. Estelle walked over to Peter with a wide grin.

"Yes he did, changed and even asked if it suited the occasion." Estelle continued on the two laughing.

"No I dressed up like you two." Roman bit back the three walking to where the grave was. "Did you know that people used to believe the dead came back as bloodthirsty revenants because the bloating of internal organs made them like belch out food inside the lungs?" Roman informed them pointlessly as they walked.

"Huh?" Peter commented and Estelle looked over at him with furrowed brows.

"Why the fuck did we need to know that?" Estelle inquired confused.

"They're coming to get you Bar-Ba-Ra they are coming for you Bar-Ba-Ra" Roman joked around crouching down with a wide grin. Estelle and Peter laughed as they continued walking.

"Is there like a summer school for serial killers?" Peter teasingly asked walking forward.

"Only for him" Estelle muttered as they came up to the grave and looked down at it.

"Sheeit" Roman commented looking down. They then started digging the grave one scoop at a time. Up until now Estelle regretted not going to the gym more often than she usually does. "So how many funerals have you been to?" Roman asked Peter. Estelle looked over at him wide eyes.

"Few Rumancek are reliably kicking it as a result of positive life style choices." Peter answered out of breath. Estelle looked between the boys and shook her head.

"You two are too much." Estelle stated with a small laugh and Peter grinned leaning over to her.

"Only for you" Peter whispered and Estelle laughed giving him the finger.

"What are they like for you people? Oh don't worry Estelle knows. Somehow." Roman said slowly. "Funerals I mean"

"Committed. You are not allowed to eat or wash. You use the earth and the dead guy suffers burns." Peter explained.

"Why?" Roman inquired.

"Because the Rumancek should not be remembered for worldly things. They also cut off the head." Peter added pausing for a moment and both Roman and Estelle looked to him confused.

"That's fucked." Estelle commented shrugging.

"Things happen to our kind if you don't do that after their dead." Peter explained to the two.

"What kind of things?" Roman asked.

"The bad kind" Peter explained vaguely.

"I have been to two funerals. One was my dad's. I remember hearing the shot and going downstairs. He was on the floor. I remember thinking how much trouble he'd be in for the mess." Roman explained with a grin.

"That's fucked up" Peter commented with a straight face. Estelle turned back to him.

"You don't even know the half of it." Estelle stated oddly and she went back to digging. After a while they were so far in that they'd have to crawl to get out. Since Roman was the only one who could reach he reached up grabbing the light. They finally got to the coffin and Peter opened it up and they looked down at it. Estelle raised an unimpressed eyebrow at the bags of ash.

"Where is she? Hold on." Peter spoke putting the light somewhere and looking back.

"Cremated? As if they'd bury her mauled." Estelle shrugged being unhelpful. Peter then opened up the other side and that showed the dead girl. Estelle covered her nose. "Okay I stand corrected." Estelle chimed in with a disgusted face.

"Fuck me" Roman grumbled out wiping his face with his wrist. Estelle looked up at him and shook her head.

"Never in this lifetime." Estelle teased and Roman looked over to her with a smirk rolling his eyes.

"You will one day" Roman flirted.

"Get the thing from my bag" Peter ordered and Roman reached over her grabbing it and handing it to Peter who unbuttoned the bottom of her shirt. "Umina patriot you don't deserve this. Peter then began slicing her open and blood pooled out like a fire hydrant almost.

"You make this look easy." Roman commented leaning forward. Peter then started to rip out the intestines and put them in a jar.

"What can your cousin possible do with a bunch of ripped out intestines?" Estelle questioned slightly grossed out by it all.

"As much as she can no promises." Peter answered shortly.

"The other funeral" Roman started.

"Yeah?" Peter asked.

"It was Shelly's." Roman informed Peter sternly. Peter then began finishing off what he was doing when Roman popped his head out of the grave looking out.

"Please don't tell me that it's a car." Estelle pleaded.

"Someone's here, someone's here, someone's here, someone's here." Roman called out panicked bending down taking Estelle with him. Estelle tripped over accidently standing in the stomach of the girl and groaning. They then scrambled around and the three climbed out of the grave packing everything up and running away from the scene. She then looked between Roman and Peter.

"These were my favourite shoes. You are buying me new ones Roman." Estelle yelled at him annoyed as they ran.

"You are such a princess for a poor bitch." Roman spat at her as they ran out of the cemetery.

"You are one to talk." She spat right back at him. Roman stopped and looked back at her annoyed and Peter stood in-between them.

"Shut up I am not ready to deal with an old fighting couple." Peter tried to calm them down and both Estelle and Roman looked to him.

"Don't insult me I'd never date him." Estelle sneered and Peter chuckled while Roman looked at her annoyed.

"You'd be lucky to land me. Come on." Roman called out to them running again. Roman then drove her to his home and she took off her shoes and looked at him annoyed. "Look I'll buy you new ones tomorrow. You can stay in my room tonight." Roman offered and Estelle nodded smiling and walked in throwing her shoes away and then taking a shower placing one of Roman's shirts on and then crawling into bed sleeping in his arms.


	5. Chapter 5

The next day getting driven home Estelle took notice to her mother sitting on the porch and turned to Roman.

"You can leave I won't be at school today." Estelle informed him getting out before he could call her out on it. Estelle ran over to her mother and gave a small smile walking inside with her mother whose green eyes turned back to outside before back to her.

"I see you are still hanging out with Roman Godfrey. I don't approve. I am good friends with Oliva but I have no respect for her whore of a son." Her mother scolded her shaking her head.

"Did Valerie come here last night?" Estelle asked changing the subject.

"She did. Dropped off Finn. I gave her some money but she didn't take it. Are you sleeping with Roman?" Her mother asked her unimpressed with her daughter's choice. Estelle looked down at the ground.

"No I'm not. You know I'm waiting until marriage. I made that promise to you." Estelle informed him sadly clenching her jaw looking away.

"I know you did but that boy. He isn't a good person. When I look into his eyes I don't see a good person. I don't see you being a good person when you are with him." Her mother scolded her with a hardened face. Estelle looked her mother in the eye taking in a soft breath.

"Is that just your opinion? He's one of my friends. He's been there. He basically helped me raise Finn. You've been too busy doing whatever you do." Estelle tried painfully looking at her. Her mother then nodded in understanding.

"I have another trip. It's to see your father. He decided he wanted to meet you. I'll be gone a few days. See you soon also Finn is already at day care." Her mother informed her walking away from her. Estelle took notice to how clean this all looked. All the bills were paid and everything was spotless. After school Estelle walked over to Valerie's house walking into her bedroom and sitting on the bed as Valerie did her work. Valerie looked over at her with a smile and handed her some math work she needed to do. Estelle finished the work and handed it back to Valerie and Valerie handed her the physics homework.

"You know with all that brain stocked up in there I'm shocked you want to be a housewife with a litter of children rather than a scientist or something." Valerie commented looking over with disbelief. Estelle just shrugged reading the book for literature.

"I've basically been a mother for 5 months. My little brother. I just like how it makes me feel. I like how it makes me feel better than who I really am. Makes me feel at peace. If I have children and a loving husband. Then I have my life set out." Estelle informed Valerie with a delusional smile making Valerie roll her eyes.

"Right of course the virgin until marriage bullshit blah, blah, blah. It's all bullshit. Guys don't like virgins. Besides why would you want it to hurt on the best day of your life?" Valerie asked quickly as if Estelle was an idiot. A small chuckle came from her lips as she looked over at Valerie.

"Just so you know I'm not a prude I've just never done anything with a guy because guys just want to fuck. It's not meaningful which is something I'm against." Estelle stated with a frown. Valerie chuckled getting up and getting some vodka and iced tea and ice from her freezer/fridge in her bedroom. Estelle looked over to Valerie with a grin and then began to make the drinks.

"Thank you Stella. You should work in a bar or something. It'd be your thing. And who knows with Roman hanging around you he could convince you to break your pattern." Valerie teased taking a drink from her vodka and raspberry iced tea. Estelle howled with laugher.

"I can assure you I see him more like a brother than anything else." Estelle shrugged turning the music up dancing with Valerie. Waking up the next day naked she stretched out and Valerie woke up as well looking over to Estelle with a smirk.

"You sure know how to tire me out. I guess my turn to be on top." Valerie teased jumping on top of Estelle kissing down her body quickly. She started to kiss at her inner thighs until reaching the entrance and teasingly began to have oral sex with Estelle. When the two were done Estelle cleaned herself up and Valerie gave her some money. "Please don't mention this to my boyfriend." Valerie begged. Estelle took the money placing it in the pockets of her black ribbed jeans and bent down to pick up her combat boots tying them up putting them on.

"You know you'll have to come out to him eventually. It's a lie." Estelle shared her concerned making Valerie nod in understanding.

"And you are so different? Come on you are totally in love with Roman. I mean for god sake you were screaming his name all of last night and right then." Valerie bit back at Estelle who ran a hand through her hair and looked back at Valerie guilty.

"I can't. My mother would never approve. She'd take Finn away from me." Estelle almost cried out getting up and then giving Valerie one last kiss before going to leave. She walked downstairs and out of the house walking down the street where she saw Peter and Roman in Roman's car. She smirked to herself walking over to them.

"What's with this guy?" Roman asked anxiously pointing go the old guy. Estelle stifled a laugh walking closer.

"I don't know he's just old" Peter answered not knowing how to answer that.

"Gross" Roman spat with distain. Estelle laughed loudly walking up to the car and sitting on the back of it swinging her legs inside of the car leaning forward making both the boys jump.

"Well now, now Roman you'll get old one day and people will say that about you." Estelle teased messing up his hair making him rolled his eyes fixing his hair.

"What are you doing around here?" Peter asked her amused.

"Sleep over study. Valerie apparently sucks at calculus." Estelle informed Peter with a shrug.

"Oh right the white as ice cream bleach blonde girl you always hang out with?" Peter asked and Estelle nodded with a smirk. "How old's your mum?" Peter asked Roman brushing some hair out of the way.

"Why don't you ask her that?" Roman snapped looking over at Peter then back to whatever they were looking at.

"Oh planning on getting some cougar action?" Estelle teased Peter and he glared at her and Roman snapped his head over.

"I sure hope not." Roman bit quickly turning away from them again.

"What if they don't leave?" Roman asked impatiently.

"How about we stop starting sentences with those two words?" Peter suggested with a sigh. Roman then got out of the car throwing his gum away and storming up to the house. Peter pushed her out of the car and running over the seats out of the car running over to Roman with Estelle. "Hey I thought we'd wait until they left…hey Roman!" Peter called out running after him. Roman then began knocking on the door. "Asshole what the fuck!"

"Mr Wilby we're here about Lisa." Roman got to the point.

"This isn't a good time." The father rejected Roman.

"Mr Wilby you are exhausted you should really take a nap." Roman did something weird to the guy making him walk in and go to sleep on the ground.

"I'm not down with breaking and entering just so you know." Estelle informed them looking over at what Roman had done to the guy.

"I'm with her on this." Peter sided with Estelle. Roman then looked at them annoyed.

"Grow some balls. How else were we gonna get in here?" Roman spat annoyed.

"Look there is a right and wrong way to do things." Peter tried with Roman. Peter then pushed Estelle inside and closed the door and the teens walked through the house. Roman got a tissue out wiping his bloodied nose. "Does it hurt?"

"You wouldn't notice if a bus hit you" Roman retorted to Peter making him laugh.

"Alright let's just do this and get out of here." Peter quipped walking upstairs with Roman and Estelle.

"In here" Roman called out and they all walked into her bedroom looking around for something. They'd texted her about it the other night. Estelle looked in the closet and saw a pair of heels she liked and took them out placing them in her bag and both Peter and Roman looked over to her.

"What they were nice. It's not like she's going to be wearing them." Estelle shrugged carelessly continuing on her search.

"Find anything?" Roman asked and the response was no.

"No you?" Peter asked which was accompanied by a weird noise made by Roman.

"Hippity hop" Roman cheered holding up some magenta lace panties with a bunny tail on the back.

"Nice" Peter nodded in approval. Estelle grimaced in disgust.

"You disgust me Roman." Estelle frowned her mouth forming an upside down U. Roman grinned pocketing the panties.

"Oh I'm sure you have something more flattering." Roman teased her and Estelle gave him the finger going back to work.

"Never in your life will you find out." Estelle bit back.

"Cool Roman Godfrey in my house." A girl cheered from behind them and everyone stopped what they were doing and looked back at her.

"Um we're looking for some mail that might have come for Lisa." Peter tried to explain.

"Why?" The girl asked not believing it.

"We think someone might have killed her." Roman deadpanned. Estelle looked at him.

"Seriously?" Estelle snapped with wide eyes.

"Someone like you?" The girl asked looking between them.

"Touché" Roman laughed.

"Shut the fuck up" Peter yelled to Roman.

"Were you three the one who dug up my sister? I don't care like that's so much worse than what already happens to you when you die." The girl jibed finding this funny. Roman then walked across the room next to Estelle. The girl then closed the draws. "Mums taking Gary to be put down."

"What?" Roman asked. The girl then pointed to the dog in the picture as if they all had amazing eyesight.

"Mum can't handle having a dog around and Dad can't handle having the dog that Lisa loved so much being with new owners. Seems like a bit much for a Boston terrier don't you think?" The girl asked making conversation.

"It does' Roman agreed and he then looked down at Estelle who hit him. "What?" He asked and she rolled her eyes.

"You didn't look over here and you" The girl stated looking at Estelle. "Were too busy stealing her stuff." She stated. She pulled out a black envelope. "I found this in Lisa's sock draw when I was looking for leggings. I thought it was an invitation to a rave so I begged her to take me. But she wouldn't. I looked at her. So fucking pretty and I said that I hope she ends up in a dumpster." She finished the story handing it to Roman.

"Okay" He said awkwardly.

"I already showed it to my parents. They were so pissed. They'd rather believe she was killed by an animal. It's easier to believe I guess." She shrugged. The black note was opened and

"What the hell is Castle Godfrey?" Peter asked looking at Roman.

"The mill. That's what people call the old steel mill." Estelle muttered looking up at Roman sternly.

"Hey thanks for this we should get going." Peter stammered.

"Why do you care who did this why are you looking for him?" The girl asked looking up almost desperately.

"Cause when we find it he's going to be joining Gary." Roman assured her winking and walking away. Estelle and Peter sent each other confused glances before following him out of the room and as they were about to turn Estelle ran into a draw knocking a vase over. She covered her mouth quickly and moved down the halls and stairs as quickly as she could. Soon the boys were sitting on the front of the car talking while Estelle remained in the back bored. "This thing put my name on this" Roman complained.

"Technically your family name." Estelle called out with a mouth full of burrito. Both Peter and Roman turned to her as she moved in between the boys.

"This matters to me as much as it matters to you." Roman cursed out angrily looking at Peter. "But if you end up in jail you better reconsider the hair." Roman stated trying to banter with Peter. Estelle laughed loudly looking over to Peter. "I'm just saying" Roman half laughed taking a bite of his burrito.

"I'll just point them to your lips." Peter shrugged indifferently. Estelle laughed loudly again. Roman laughed and made over exaggerated kissing noises and motion grabbing Estelle who grabbed onto Peter all of them laughing. He then moved away and looked into the distance.

"Do you believe everything happens for a reason?" Roman asked.

"Man I try not to fucking think about it." Peter informed Roman until he phone went off and he went to go check on it.

"What is it?" Roman inquired.

"Uh Linda, she needs some help at home with some water or some shit. Can we re-meet go to the mill later? What is that a problem?" Peter asked taking a bite out of his burrito.

"Man's gotta do." Roman shrugged. Peter then took off leaving Roman and Estelle on the car. "So shorty any boys lately? I never see you around them." Roman stated as they got in the car. Estelle chuckled looking over at Roman as they drove off. She was memorised but him. He was beautiful. So beautiful and kind, yet she'd felt something dark from him. Something that would destroy everything he touched.

"Most teenage boys just want sex. I mean you are a prime example. I want to wait until marriage. Besides there is no guys I'd ever date in this town." Estelle informed him making him laugh.

"I'll pretend I believe that. You coming tonight?" Roman asked her driving to her house.

"I can't. My father is coming home." Estelle informed him with a bright smile. Roman looked over at her sternly pulling over. He rested his hand on her hand and looked at her worried.

"Be careful. I don't want you hurt because of him again." Roman commented and Estelle looked over at him with a smile.

"It's not going to be like last time. He's going to stay." Estelle tried kissing his cheek and getting out of the car and running up to the house cleaning herself and Finn up.


	6. Chapter 6

After a long moment of waiting and cooking dinner her mother finally walked in and so did a man she assumed was her father. She walked over with Finn on her hip and held out her hands. "Hi you must be my father." Estelle assumed with a bright smile. The man shook her hand smiling.

"I don't know if I have to be but I certainly am. Estelle your mother, she brought me here because of some issues you are having. Can we talk in the study?" Her father asked her and Estelle nodded confused and handed Finn to her mother before walking into the study with him sitting down on the chair while her father sat behind the desk holding a book. "This might not be easy to say but I'm going to get straight to the point because I have another family waiting for me back in Brooklyn. You are a seer. Part of a collective group of individuals born with odd abilities. Um they are rare and selective in families. Half witch or some bullshit like that. They are chosen by a sort of dysfunction in the brain which allows them to host this power. Here is a book. There is an old lady in the caravan that is a seer. Tell her I sent you. Jacob Tregetour. She'll teach you what you need to know. I have a flight to catch in about 20 minutes. I do have to go. Good meeting you. He nodded calmly handing her a book and then getting up and walking out of the house and driving off. Estelle looked down the book confused. Opening the book slowly she opened it to the chapter titled capabilities. Precognition, aura manipulation, death sense, divination, mediumship, astral projection and if powerful enough reality warping. This was a fucked up joke. Estelle thought to herself getting up and walking over to her mother.

"Why didn't you tell me he wasn't going to stay? I thought he'd stay." Estelle almost cried out and her mother looked at her softly placing Finn down for a nap and walking over to her.

"I'm sorry Estelle I really am but I don't want you to be the happy little bambi you are right now. I want you to be strong. Fearless. Brave. You are none of the above. You are even afraid of intimacy until someone sticks around for too long. You need to get over this. Otherwise you are missing life. You are missing your truth self. Your father left us. Not the other way around. He didn't want us." Her mother informed her with a sorry expression. She went to touch Estelle who pushed her away tears forming in her eyes Estelle ran out of the house and over to her car driving off. When she was sitting near the river she curled up holding her legs close to her chest. The tears wouldn't go away they just wouldn't. She didn't want to feel like this. It wasn't fair. Why did everyone else get parents who wanted them? It just wasn't fair. For as long as her father leaving her she'd always wanted his approval. Maybe her mother drove him away. Maybe there was a chance he wanted her. Estelle notes he had 15 minutes until boarding and she got in her car and sped off to the airport and ran out of her car and into the airport and when she saw them she ran up to him.

"Jacob!" Estelle called out stopping just in front of him. Her father looked down at her confused.

"What are you doing here Estelle?" He asked quickly. Her blue eyes looked up pleadingly.

"Take me with you. Please. I want to get to know my father. I want to get to know you Jacob. Please" Estelle begged tears threatening to fall. Jacob let out a loud sigh pulling Estelle to the side.

"Look Estelle, you turned out good. You are such a beautiful girl but I can't take you with me. I want to get to know you trust me I do. But I don't want to know a seer. They see it all. The good and the bad. My mother was one and so was my father. Your mother is also one. You will be strong Estelle but I in no way shape or form want to know you. I can't. I have another family. They don't know about you or Finn or your mother. They can't. I don't want to screw it up. They came along and they believed in me. If I messed that up then I'd have nothing." Jacob explained to her holding her shoulders. Estelle took a deep breath wiping away the tears looking up at him.

"You'd have me and Finn" Estelle tried wide eyes her hands by her side not knowing what to do. Jacob looked around hoping she wouldn't cause a scene.

"No I wouldn't Estelle. Not after everything I've done to you. You don't remember now but when you remember you won't love me and neither will Finn." Jacob made excuses wiping the tears falling from Estelle's eyes. She took a shaky breath in closing her eyes for a long moment.

"I can forgive. I could forgive you for everything you did. I just want a father. If I had a father, then maybe my mother would be my mother again. Maybe we could be a happy family. We could live a happy life like the family we are supposed to be. I will forgive you for everything you've ever done. Please I just need you to come back. Please." Estelle begged holding onto him not being able to stop the tears falling from her eyes. She wanted so badly for him to accept her. Love her. She wanted a happy family. She wanted to have a good family so she'd be able to tell her children in the future she'd helped bring her family back together.

"And what about my other family?" Jacob asked her his anger rising. Estelle took a step back from him shocked at what he said.

"I was your family first! I was your family first and you left me! What about me!" Estelle yelled at him crying angry tears of despair looking at him with hurt in her eyes. Jacob looked down ashamed and rubbed the back of his neck.

"I'm sorry Estelle. I'm not good for you. You don't want me as your father. There is no such thing as a perfect family. There never will be." Jacob apologised to her sorrowful and Estelle looked away from him to the ground.

"Yes there is. One day I am going to have a perfect family. I am going to be there for my children, I am going to love them. I am going to do that and I am going to do that by myself. I didn't need you for the last 8 years of my life; I didn't need my mother every time she flaked on me or Finn. I don't need you to show me how to do anything. I did it all on my own. I did everything on my own. I just wanted a father. I wanted you to approve of me, love me life a father is programmed to love his daughter. Like a parent is supposed to love their child. Why didn't you choose me?" Estelle asked him painfully after her angry sad rant. She felt her knees falling as everyone in the airport watched then as if they were a car crash so bad they had to look away but they couldn't. Jacob pursed his lips looking down at her.

"I was too young Estelle. I didn't love you. I didn't love your mother. I wanted to be there for you but I couldn't. I am so sorry. I have to go. Please don't try and contact me again." Jacob almost begged turning and walking away not looking back at her. Estelle felt her legs collapse under her as she fell to the floor. She could no longer control the tears falling from her eyes. It was disappointing. Stop crying. She tried to will herself to stop crying. He wasn't there for 8 years of her life. Why would today have been any different? He basically came her because her mother forced him to tell her what the hell she was. Her mother wanted to destroy her. Wanted to destroy her views on the world. Well she fucking did. Estelle refused to believe her mother did this. She loved her mother. She was a good mother. Terry Tregetour. She was a good person. A good mother. Just sad. Estelle understood it. Her mother was in love with this monster. And every time she looked at Estelle all she could see was Jacob. The blue eyes that matched his, sandy brown hair that matched his, a figure that was the feminie version of his and a face that matched his. She hated it. She must have hated Estelle because of that. Estelle's sobs didn't weaken as she cried on the airport floor. Getting up and walking back to her car she hit the steering wheel over and over again until she started to feel the pain of it. Driving off back to her house she walked upstairs and looked into her mirror dressed in her underwear. She hated everything she saw. She hated herself. Her father was a no good heartbreaker. He didn't love anyone. He didn't love her. He didn't choose her. Estelle screamed falling to the ground crying again. He was too young, he had another family he just didn't want the family he left behind. He didn't want them anymore. Her mother Terry walked into the room picking Estelle up and placing her on her bed brushing the hair out of her face noticing the tear stains on her cheeks.

"It's going to be okay sweetie. This will make you strong. You aren't weak Estelle. He will make you weak. It's okay. Don't cry for anyone. If they can make you cry then they don't deserve you." Terry calmed Estelle down or tried to wiping away the tears still falling from her eyes. Estelle then turned around pushing Terry away. Terry looked at her sternly and rubbed her up and down. Finn then started crying and screaming loudly but Terry paid no attention. Estelle pushed Terry away running over to Finn and holding up closely pushing back her tears crying and moving him up and down calming him down. She walked him to her bed and held him close falling to sleep with him next to her. A few nights after hiding in her house with Finn while her mother worked she finally heard a knock come at the door. Estelle put Finn down and walked down stairs to the door opening it and seeing Roman there. Estelle went to close her door but Roman pushed the door open storming inside and taking his jacket off.

"Where the fuck have you been? This place looks like a dump." Roman commented looking around the house walking further in. Estelle sighed tiredly following him.

"Why are you here Roman?" Estelle asked him not in the mood.

"To find out why I haven't seen or heard from you in three days." Roman almost yelled. Estelle looked away from him moving away from him and his intense gaze then set upon her. "He left"

"He didn't even stay for the dinner I cooked." Estelle muttered and Roman looked at her shocked.

"Estelle" Roman went to touch her but she slapped his hands away.

"Piss off Roman. He didn't want me. I'm over it. I'm dropping out of high school." Estelle informed him going and pouring herself a drink.

"Like hell you are Estelle. You are going to go back to school and finish high school to the best of your ability." Roman spoke to her his eyes focusing on her intently and his hands on her face. Estelle looked into his eyes shocked and paused for a moment before blinking and taking a drink.

"Roman thank you for being here." Estelle whispered her arms wrapping around him and his hands around her holding her closely. Roman then broke down crying and she directed him to the couch.

"I should go" He whimpered out and Estelle watched him carefully.

"Look I'm always here for you Roman. I'm always here. You can always talk to me. I'm not going anywhere." Estelle told him kindly her hands on his shoulders holding him close as he cried.

"I'm ugly" He whimpered out not meeting her gaze. "I'm an ugly person. I have an ugliness that's impossible to love." He cried out again onto her. Estelle looked at him worried.

"You aren't ugly Roman. You are my rock. My hero." Estelle cried out looking him in the eye and she leaned in her forehead pressing against his breathing for a long moment her eyes flickering up meeting his.

"So are you Estelle. You are my rock, you are beautiful and you are smart and you are too good for this world. For me." Roman's voice broke looking her in the eyes. Estelle brushed some hair out of his face looking him in the eye. She had a flash of Roman holding a child, looking down at the child as if; it was the most precious thing in the world. Estelle wasn't delusional enough to believe it was hers. Roman didn't love her. He just thought she was convenient.

"Why are you here?" Estelle inquired softly running her hands over the scars on his face.

"I destroy every life I touch Estelle. I just I don't want you to be a part of my life. I don't want to hurt you." Roman whispered to her his heart couldn't have hurt any more than it did now. Looking into the eyes of a kind girl. A girl who'd always believed the good in everyone. She'd never said a bad thing about anyone. Never had the guts to. She was friends with Ashley, Valerie hell she was friends with the ones with the worst reputations in school. She believed there was good in everyone. How could she still have hope for him? She must have been fucked up in the head if she believed that. He wondered to himself as his hands went to the base of her neck and he leaned in kissing her softy. His hands snaked around her waist drawing her in closer for another kiss their lips meeting in a slow and long kiss. Drawing her in closer until she was on his lap his hands went to her jaw holding it as he deepened the kiss making Estelle moan slightly her hands running through his hair pulling him closer to her. He then laid her down on the couch and started kissing down her neck sucking it occasionally and he got up taking off her underwear and moving the hair out of his face again going to lean down. He then kissed her again and he looked into her eyes. "Say I'm ugly," Roman whispered. Her mouth went dry before her complied.

"You are ugly Roman." Estelle whispered softly and Roman nodded looking down at her in all of her innocence.

"Do you want this?" Roman asked her carefully he didn't know if he could bear hurting her. He didn't know if he should. Estelle leaned up giving him a long kiss leaning her forehead on his before getting off the couch.

"No." Estelle whispered before she ran upstairs and into her bedroom and she picked up Finn holding him close crying lightly. Roman looked at the stairs hatefully. Yet another person who didn't want him. No one wanted him. He'd hurt them all Roman thought before stepping outside of the house and walking to his car going to find Ashley. Estelle woke up the next day and got Finn ready for day care driving him down there and then getting herself a cup of coffee. Getting her phone out as she waited for her coffee she dialled Roman's number waiting to no anvil as she hoped he would answer. After the 5th call she didn't get an answer and walked off to her car when she got her coffee and she drove off to his house. When she got there Olivia answered and looked at her annoyed.

"You can't see him." Olivia stated coldly her eyes narrowed at Estelle.

"Please Olivia. I need to see him." Estelle begged and Olive glared at her.

"No he needs his family not his high school dropout whore." Olivia snarled slamming the door in Estelle's face. Estelle wiped the tears from her eyes and then she got in her car driving away. Estelle sat on top of her house roof looking out into Hemlock Grove. How fucked up it doesn't seem. Living proof that nothing was what it was on the surface. The smell of rain in the air it only rained on occasions, every house was wet every nook and cranny. How went and depressing it just all seemed. The fire of her lighter meeting the unlit cigarette soon lighting up. Estelle brought it to her lips taking in a deep drag of her cigarette leaning back blowing the smoke out into the air into the distance. Sometimes Estelle wished she could disappear into a cloud of smoke. Throwing her cigarette away into the distance her wet boots moved up to the skylight and she jumped down into her bedroom her floorboards making an unsightly sound. Estelle moved down her stairwell and to her car driving off to see the seer that her father had told her about.


	7. Chapter 7

Once she made it to the trailer park she got out of her car locking it and walking to the trailer that Jacob told her. When she made it she looked around. The went dirt turning quickly into mud, the outside of the trailer old and rusty. She brought her fist up to the rusty door knocking on it a few times until an old lady answered.

"Who the fuck are you?" She asked coldly seemingly blind.

"I'm Estelle Tregetour, Jacob sent me." Estelle introduced herself her mouth ajar not knowing what else to say. The lady's face seemed to have hardened for a long moment.

"Spawn of satin you are. You'll bring nothing but bad luck. I see it. I see your future child. You won't die. Everyone you've ever loved will. Why are you here?" The lady questioned cryptically.

"I'm a seer. I don't know how to control it. I can't get any sleep. I'm going insane. I'm seeing things. I hate it. Please help me." Estelle begged desperately. The lady then pushed her away from her.

"No, learn by yourself. It is a sense of being. Each seer is different, some are strong, some are weak and then I sense some are like you. Death in human form. You aren't special. Go figure it out for yourself." The lady spat slamming her door in Estelle's face making her jump. Estelle looked around shaken and she then ran to her car and drove off back to her house. She pulled out the old book starting to read it. Over the next few days she spent studying the powers of the seer while going to school and doing her work to the best she could and looking after Finn. Estelle was sitting on her bed it was a week after she'd started trying to learn how to use her power. Estelle was stroking Finn's hair watching the wall of her bedroom thinking back to the first dream she'd ever had like the rest of them. She'd had it 6 times over the two years. Each time becoming more visible. Estelle closed her eyes thinking about Roman her eyes began to sting. Maybe from the tears or from something else. Estelle looked in the mirror seeing her eyes go a ghostly foggy grey. She then saw Roman lying on a bed, with machines attached to him. He then appeared in front of her and Estelle looked at him shocked standing up quickly touching the side of his face.

"Roman" Estelle whimpered right before she saw he was about to speak he disappeared. Estelle cursed herself and kicked the bench angrily. She could see ghosts, mental fabrications of someone who wasn't all there in the physical realm. Admittedly next to the death sense, mediumship was the next best thing she could do. She wasn't even any good at it. Estelle ran her hands through her hair stressed out she moved over to the bed and looked down at her little brother Finn. She knew he'd grow up loved. Grow up good. A smile worked its way onto her cracked lips watching him sleep in peace. Touching him she focused her mind on anything she could get from Finn. Anything at all. She then leaned down and kissed the top of his head. "I love you Finn. I love you and I promise I'll never leave you. I'm going to love you the way that our parents couldn't. You deserve better than what I got. You are such a sweetheart. You will never be hurt. Not as long as I live I promise. You are too good for this world. Too good for our parents. You are going to be great. You are going to do great things. No one can change that. I promise. I promise I'll always be here, I'll always be alive for you." Estelle whispered watching her sleeping brother's peaceful form. Her eyes began to hurt again and soon found that closing them only hurt more so she opened them looking down at Finn.

 _Finn was standing in a fancy house with a beautiful girl around his age. Finn had a wide grin plastered on his face and his kind blue eyes watched the girl carefully. She was beautiful, her hair a dirty blonde, her eyes blue and her skin tanned and she was just simply beautiful. Her hands clutched Finn's tightly and the two were hugging. Finn leaned forward giving her a fleeting kiss which she accepted and then the two got up and walked out of the house looking back. It was snowing. The snowflakes falling illuminating their beauty. Their kindness. How easily in love the two were. He kissed the girls forehead leaning them on each other. Both of their eyes flittered closed. Their forehead meeting each other. They seemed to be breathing each other in as if they were their life preservers. They were magic to each other. They were the kind of magic that would end up together forever. The two pulled apart after a long moment and they casted one last look at the big house in front of them and the girl wiped a tear away from his face hugging him closely. "She loved you Finn. She's in a better place. She's with him." The girl tried to help him with a hopeless smile. Finn looked down at her nodding wiping away a tear and kissing the girl for a short moment._

 _"I know. I wish I knew him." Finn confessed holding the girl closely and she nodded as a lone tear fell from her eye._

 _"I do too. Come on." She agreed holding him close as they walked to the car and drove away._

Estelle felt a tear fall from her eye and she wiped it away from her face and curled up throwing her head against the wall in pain. She then laid down on her bed moving Finn with her and she held him close watching as his chest rose and fell until she heard a knock at her bedroom door and her mother walked in looking at her.

"I see you moved him in here." Terry stated with a crooked smile. Estelle sat up walking over to her door nodding.

"I felt it was more safe for him. I need him to be loved." Estelle informed her mother looking up at her numbly.

"I always knew Roman Godfrey would ruin you Estelle. Tomorrow I'm going to teach you how to defend yourself with your seer powers. You aren't strong or fast or anything but you have other gifts that don't lie in the depressing. Goodnight darling." Terry spoke softly and she then kissed Estelle's temple before walking to her bedroom. The next day Estelle walked out to the backyard waiting for Terry. When she walked out she handed Estelle a gun. "Be strong enough to pull the trigger. That's the only thing I can tell you about using a weapon. Use your fists if you want anything done. Don't go crying like a little bitch about it when you get hit. If you get knocked down get back up and beat the shit out of then harder than they can. Using your power of emotional manipulation you can direct your emotions and pain onto them with a punch or a hit." Terry growled at her daughter getting her fist clenched and punching Estelle in the face making her stumble and look up at Terry.

"I am pretty sure this is child abuse." Estelle growled out. Terry smirked and then grabbed Estelle's shoulders and kneeing her in the stomach. Estelle cried out in pain and knelt to the ground. Terry then punched Estelle in the face making her fall to the ground bleeding from the nose and mouth.

"I told you that if you get knocked down get back up and beat them twice as hard." Terry half yelled at Estelle kicking her in the face making her cry out in pain landing on her back. Terry then grabbed Estelle by the collar looking at how limp Estelle had gotten. It broke Terry's heart to see her baby girl like that. Estelle was too good to be beaten up like this. But she had to learn. She wasn't too good for everything. She was a pathetic little insect compared to everything else in the big bad world. Terry wanted to beat the innocence out of Estelle.

"I can't do that. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to hurt anyone." Estelle cried out making Terry punch Estelle in the face again and she fell to the ground when Terry let her go.

"You need to stop being weak. No one will ever look up to someone who is weak. You can't raise a child and be weak. You can't look after a family and be weak. You can't love someone and be weak. You are weak Estelle. You can't be weak and have the future you want to have. The world is not a wish granting factory Estelle so get your head out of the acid." Terry yelled out getting Estelle to stand up and look at her. Terry looked at her for a long moment not knowing what to do. What to feel.

"I…I don't know how to be strong." Estelle whispered.

"Yes you do Estelle." Terry yelled at her punching her in the gut making Estelle double over. "You've been strong your whole life. You've raised yourself. You are raising Finn. You are strong. But I can't let you be weak. Be strong. Hit me." Terry yelled punching her in the face and then kicking her stomach and making her fall to the ground and kicking her face again. Estelle looked up broken and beaten. She looked to the ground guilty.

"I'm not strong. I can't do this. I can't hurt anyone." Estelle cried out. Terry frowned looking down at Estelle getting her to stand up again and then Terry swung a punch knocking Estelle to the ground.

"I'm fairly sure you can. You are a seer. I am too. I am a weak seer. You are the messenger of death. You have a special connection to death. Hurt me!" Terry yelled angrily. Estelle crawled onto her two feet looking over at Terry with tears in her eyes.

"You want me to hurt you because you want something you love to hurt you again. You want a reason to hate me. Well guess what I fucking hate you! I hate you mum. You aren't my mother. You are just some knocked up bitch who got pregnant when she was too young to love anything other than what she saw in the mirror and in the sack. I won't ever be like you. I went through my whole life and I became everything I wanted to be without you, without Jacob. I didn't need you. Stop telling me what I need to be to be what I want to become. You are a monster Terry. I hope that when you look in the mirror you realise that!" Estelle yelled out the blood pooling from her face and the tears falling from her eyes. Terry wiped the tears from her eyes feeling the pain Estelle felt. The neglect and the hate she felt.

"We are all doomed to become like our parents." Terry whispered. Estelle swung her fist hitting Terry in the face once before turning away from her.

"No. You can't become someone who was never there to begin with." Estelle whispered walking inside and cleaning the blood off her and then she walked into her bedroom and picked up Finn taking him for a walk. On her walk she then ran into Olivia who smiled to her walking up to her.

"You can come see Roman. He doesn't have many friends. He could use as many as he can get." Olivia offered Estelle with a small smile. Estelle nodded and then Olivia looked at Finn and held her hands out and Estelle handed Finn to her. "He's such a beautiful boy. Yours?" Olivia asked as they walked down the walkway and Estelle shook her head.

"No. My mothers. But I raised him." Estelle informed Olivia who handed Finn back and they climbed into the car.

"He's a beautiful boy. What's his name?" Olivia asked nicely.

"Finn. I chose the name." Estelle informed Olivia.

"Let me guess you were the first one other than the doctors to hold him?" Olivia guessed with a sly smile and Estelle nodded as Olivia drove off. "Then you are his mother. He is your son. He will be your life. Do me a favour. Raise him right. A boy raised wrong is a worthless man." Olivia joked turning back to the road. Estelle looked down at Finn and smiled kindly at him and touched his hair.

"I know. My father was one of them." Estelle muttered softly looking at the road as it turned a corner. Olivia cast a look to Estelle and then back to the road.

"You love my son obviously. I see it in your eyes. Every time you see him. You just your eyes light up with joy. It's like you're on LSD. I think Roman could come to love you too. He's a good man. I just wish he'd realised how much he needed you and Peter earlier." Olivia chimed in turning to her driveway. Estelle then climbed out of the car and walked into the house. "He's upstairs. I'll take Finn for a moment." Olivia chided her and Estelle nodded handing Finn to him hesitantly. "I don't hurt babies that aren't mine." Olivia assured Estelle who nodded in understanding. Estelle then walked upstairs and saw Roman and she paused for a moment at the door and walked over to him holding Roman's hand. She caressed his soft hand and brushed some of his hair out of his face and then she leaned down kissing his cheek.

"Hi Roman I feel really fucking stupid talking to you like this. But um I've been busy. You won't believe it but I've discovered I'm a seer. Whatever that means. I'll explain it to you when you get out of the coma. I'm getting off topic. Anyway I love you Roman. I love you and I'll never leave you. Not as long as I'm alive. Please I need you to wake up soon. I love you." Estelle whispered wiping a tear from her eye and letting go of his hand walking out of the room falling to the ground crying holding her knees close to her as she did so. After that night she went back home with Finn. She went to a gym training with a personal trainer how to fight. She'd have to give her mother that. She knew how to get a message across. The next day at school Estelle was in math class bored a fuck watching the window outside. She then looked over to see Peter in Roman's car and she watched as Roman was walking past her window and he turned to see her and gave her a cocky smirk and winked at her then ran off to the car. Estelle smiled rolling her eyes and turning back to the class. Later that night Estelle was playing with Finn chasing him around the house as he crawled around the kitchen when she heard her phone go off. Estelle cursed silently picking up Finn and answering the phone. "Who is it?" Estelle asked trying to make sure her phone didn't fall.

"Roman, I need you to come to mine as soon as you can. Quickly." Roman rushed and he then hung up quickly. Estelle looked down placing Finn on the kitchen table looking at her phone and then back at Finn and she hugged Finn tightly.

"I can't let you get hurt Finn. I promise you'll be okay." Estelle whispered. She then picked up Finn carrying him upstairs and packing his stuff before getting in her car and driving off to Ashley's. When she got there she knocked on the door twice and Ashley answered smiling.

"Hi Steller what can I do for you? Want some whiskey and fun?" Ashley asked shaking her body. Estelle shook her head.

"No thank you maybe another time. Can you please look after Finn for a while? If anything happens call me. Thank you I'll be back soon." Estelle called out running out of the house and back to her car getting in it and driving off to the Godfrey house. She parked and ran up to Shelly's room. When she got there she saw Peter and he looked over at her and Estelle paused for a moment looking Peter up and down with a smirk. "Now I know what Letha saw in you." Estelle teased walking up to him. Peter then hugged her and they walked to get something from the kitchen.

"Thanks I guess." Peter nodded to her and Estelle smiled awkwardly. "Um why's your face all beaten up?"

"Shit mother. Don't read too much into it." Estelle answered uncaringly and she then noticed Peter pull out meat from the fridge that was bleeding out. He then started to cook it waiting impatiently and flipped it over with his hands and poured the extra blood into it and pressed his hands on it and then took it out and began eating it as if it was the best thing he'd had in months. Estelle looked around and noticed Letha walk into the room. "I'll leave you two to it." Estelle nodded patting Letha's belly and walking elsewhere pouring herself a drink of Olivia's finest scotch. Estelle heard the police outside and then got up leaving through the kitchen door and outside and got in her car waiting for Peter and Letha. Estelle then saw they were stuck at the door. She walked inside and grabbed a bat walking towards them seeing that they pushed Letha over and threatened to break Peter's neck. Estelle then got ready to swing her bat and hit one of the cops over the head with it making him fall to the ground unconscious and she then took the gun and pointed it at the guy holding Peter. "I will fucking blow your brains over the overpriced carpet you assholes." Estelle spat at one of them glaring daggers at him.

"Shelly" Letha whispered.

"Oh that's fucking perfect go get the hell out of here" The guy yelled and Estelle then shot right above the guy's head.

"I won't miss next time let him go!" Estelle yelled at him and he looked at her wide eyed in fear. Estelle then felt pain in her eyes and willed it to stop noticing that the guy in front of her. He was black. He was going to die.

"Oh brilliant, its okay Shell" Roman whispered walking into the scene calming Shelly down. Roman then walked forward and Estelle saw the guy point the guy at Roman. Estelle then shot him. The guy fell back on the ground bleeding in front of Peter and Letha. Estelle watched as he bled out numbly. Nothing could be processed in her mind. Nothing at all. Roman then got rid of the fat guy and talked with Letha and Peter. Estelle dropped the gun and waked out of the room and ran outside trying to catch her breath. Roman then ran out after her and placed his hand on her shoulder looking at her sternly. "Are you okay Estelle?" Roman asked her calmly. Estelle then turned around and she threw her arms around him stroking the back of his head holding him close. Roman shocked at her display of affection held her tightly and hugging her back. He then let her go and looked down at her.

"I'm in love with you Roman." Estelle confessed to him and pushed him away quickly. Roman went to say something but Estelle shook her head. "But there's a catch. You aren't allowed to love me back." Estelle whispered walking back into the house. They then took her car and Roman drove. Estelle sitting in the back.

"Where the hell are we?" Peter asked.

"I used to take walks back here with my dad." Letha added.

"Some part of Hemlock Acers." Roman informed everyone turning into a driveway and coming to a stope. They all the piled out and Norman was walking over to them.

"Well so relieved to see you up and about Roman." Norman almost cheered throwing his hands up. Estelle took a moment to admire the place. Always having such a weakness for old well-built things. "But you, you should have told me"

"Sorry dad things have been a little crazy." Letha apologised looking down at her lap.

"Glad to see you alright" Norman commented looking to Peter. "Letha told me what happened what that mob did you your place what a disgrace."

"Well the place needed a tune up." Peter shrugged lightening the mood patting his cat. They all then followed Norman inside of the church. As they walked in Estelle coughed because of the smell and looked around at how old and worn it was.

"Yeah this place was closed down after the new sanctuary was built. We never had a chance to clean it out. Anyway you won't have to worry about anyone checking the ashtrays." Norman explained to them and Estelle then walked off wondering around the place checking out the cool stuff. Estelle then found a symbol on the ground. It was a necklace. Estelle picked it up looking at it confused. It was the world triad symbol. Estelle looked at her wrist noticing she had the same symbol tattooed on her wrist it was small and about the same size as the symbol. Estelle then locked it around her neck getting up and looking around. Estelle then climbed up the scaffolding looking out the tall window smoking as Letha and Peter were having a moment. When Norman and Roman walked in Estelle jumped down off the scaffolding and looked to Roman sternly and then she sat next to Peter.

"You not going with them?" Peter asked.

"I will be going eventually. Just giving you some company." Estelle informed him with a smile and he chuckled and let out a weird yodel and then turned to look at his cat.

"Hey Casper that's mine." He stated using a baby voice and then going to pat it. Estelle laughed and went to eat some food. After a few hours Estelle got in her car and drove to Ashley's. When she got there she sat in the lounge playing with Finn and Ashley came sitting down next to her.

"How was Finn?" Estelle asked him bopping him up and down.

"Good he's a little cutie. He is so nice. He is going to break so many hearts when he is only. I love him. Can he stay here tonight?" Ashley asked whining and Estelle laughed and nodded as the two girls fell asleep with him on the couch. The next day Estelle watched the news seeing someone was killed again. Estelle walked out of the house getting in her car to go and find out if her mother was okay. As she was driving she saw her mother in front of the house with movers. Estelle pulled over and ran out of the car and ran up to her mother.

"What the hell are you doing?" Estelle exclaimed.

"I sold the house. I'm done with this town, I'm moving to Madrid. You and Finn aren't coming. I got you an apartment not too far from here. It's closer to your school. I pay the rent for you. You two were always better off without me." Terry shared with her calmly getting her in her car and driving off. Estelle watched as her mother left shocked. Estelle then got back in her car driving back to the graveyard but she saw a ghost and followed it to the park where Brooke was killed. Estelle knelt in front of the house looking at it with pain in her eyes. Closing her eyes Estelle saw Letha dead on the ground with Peter crying over her. Estelle got up wiping the tears off her face. She needed to be strong. She need to be brave. Estelle leaned her hands on the wall slamming her hands down on the roof and leaning down as the tears fell from her eyes.

"Be strong. Be brave. Please. Please be strong I need you to be strong." Estelle cried out gritting through her teeth running her hands through her hair. Estelle felt something shift inside of her before she felt a tap on her shoulder. Estelle turned around and her eyes went wide seeing herself. She didn't look like herself.

"I'll be strong. I mean you could never be strong. Not the way you need to be. So I guess I'm stuck doing it for you. You can't even be a seer right. All you see is death. Well this will make it so much sweeter." The other her smirked looking around and then chuckled. Estelle's eyes went wide.

"Please go away." Estelle almost begged.

"Not a chance sweetheart. By the way I'll be a better you then you ever could be. I mean with all the crying bullshit I'm shocked you still have tears left. Don't worry you'll get to come back. Maybe." The other her laughed loudly and then she grabbed onto Estelle's mind merging into her. The other her laughed loudly walking the other way lighting a cigarette taking a drag. Looking down she saw she got a text from Roman. "I am going to have so much fun with you." She muttered looking around and getting in the car driving off to meet him. She was waiting inside the church when Roman, Peter, Letha and Christina walked in. When the new Estelle saw Christina she gave a small smirk knowing how much Estelle treated her kindly. Like a sister. Even letting her stay over most days. Estelle walked up to Christina giving her a big hug and Christina hugged her back.

"Am I safe here?" Christina asked with a quivering voice. Estelle then nodded brushing some hair out of her face.

"You'll be okay Christina. I promise." Estelle muttered kindly holding her close as she stood up. "Nothing will hurt you Christina." Estelle spoke noticing her worried face and she pulled Christina along with her. As they sat down Christina started laughing.

"You know I kissed you once." Christina laughed out looking to Peter who was taking off his rings. "It was right when you moved here it was my first. I never told anyone that not even the twins. They lost their virginity the summer before and that was all they ever talked about. I wanted the experience it's what writers do. That's why I researched how to turn. But where do you start?" Christina rambled on sadly making Peter pause and look up at her.

"What do you mean how to turn?" Peter inquired. Christina then began to explain her escapades. Researching online to finding a book in the library on it.

"It's like I said experience is a writer's material. And you had so many stories and I wanted my own. I wanted to be as free as you." Christina whimpered looking at him sadly. "I wasn't optimistic I mean why would something like that ever work? I felt pretty silly." Christina said before explaining that she did drink from his paw. Peter and Roman stared at her shocked not knowing what to do while Christina inched closer to Estelle hugging her tightly. "Then it came the harvest moon."

"Jesus Christ" Peter breathed out. Estelle looked over at him confused. "Wrong moon." Roman then walked over to Letha pushing her away as Peter walked over to Christina. "You need to come with me."

"Okay" Christina took his hand and Estelle followed before Peter looked back at her shaking his head.

"No you can't." Peter informed Estelle who nodded with fake tears in her eyes. Estelle then saw Christina was on her knees and watched in horror. The new Estelle hid a smirk before letting her mind shift back to the real Estelle. Estelle watched helpless as she saw Peter hurting Christina. Estelle went to run over to Christina Roman ran over to her grabbing her and dragging her away. Estelle screamed trying to escape his grasp kicking and Roman then hugged her closely to him stroking her hair keeping her from looking. Christina started screaming and Estelle tried to push him away but he kept her close until he let her go running after Letha. Estelle ran away seeing Christina. She was a wolf. Estelle watched wide eyes as Peter put something on his face walking over to the wolf. Estelle screamed as the wolf attacked Peter.

"No Peter" Estelle screamed loudly until he stumbled out falling to the ground blood falling from his mauled face. He then fell to the ground. The wolf then rounded the corner walking over to them. Estelle backed away but she was too close to it. Estelle just stood there paralysed as Roman tried to kill it swinging his thing at her. The wolf then ran up to Roman tackling him and throwing his weapon away and the wolf growled down at him before looking at Letha. Peter then showed up as a wolf and the two fought. Roman grabbed her arm walking away from it. The three were helpless. They couldn't stop it. The white wolf bit Roman and then turned back to them. They then heard Shelly ran in and she grabbed the wolf but its mouth snapping its neck. Estelle let out a loud scream falling to her knees looking at Christina. Crying loudly she sobbed into her hands. Gun shots soon went off hitting Shelly making her run away Roman not far behind. Estelle stayed in that one spot motionless until the morning. Letha took Peter back to somewhere leaving Estelle there sitting all alone. Estelle looked up seeing the other her.

"Look at you pathetic. You might as well be little orphan Annie because no one wants you. No one is here for you. Bye the way a proper introduction. I'm Meg." She introduced herself with a brilliant psychotic grin.

"Go away." Estelle whimpered out wiping the tears away. Meg just looked at her with a smirk.

"Are you kidding? I'm the only one here for you. Not even the boy you love is here for you. So step up or I will." Meg spat angrily and Estelle got up taking in a shaky breath going to the exit. Meg followed her. "Do you honestly ever stop crying? Life isn't ruled by virtue; our conscious is." Meg called out after her and Estelle stopped and looked back at Meg before walking away and Meg then took control of her. Meg later went to the funeral of Christina finding some pity for the dead girl. Meg could feel the pain of Estelle and it felt pathetic to feel this bad for one person. Meg then laughed to herself walking to her car driving off. "You knew about their deaths the whole time you little swine." Meg laughed loudly pulling into the driveway of Ashley's house and walking up to the door step. She then knocked on the door and Ashley opened up. "I'm here for Finn." Meg informed Ashley who nodded handing him over.

"Any time you want he can stay here. Oh and we got some bad news. It's really bad. They found it was Valerie that was killed the other night. She's dead. I'm sorry I know how much you two cared about." Ashley whispered softly going to hug Meg who pushed her away holding Finn tightly.

"It's fine. We weren't as close as we used to be." Meg shrugged going to walk to the car and placed Finn next to her. She then drove to the apartment flat and placed Finn down in the cot playing with him. "Countdown to Letha's death little guy. God I can't wait. Best say of my life." Meg laughed loudly and then she walked into the kitchen pouring herself a glass of vodka to celebrate. Meg closed her eyes seeing Letha dead. "Cheers to the universe for making this happen." Meg howled with laughter again. She then went to her phonebook getting the number of the lady in the trailer.

"I told you not to contact me ever again." The lady hissed angrily and Meg laughed.

"Estelle didn't get your cryptic messages but I did. I'm the messenger of death. Guess what I see yours tonight. Run, run, run." Meg howled out tauntingly grabbing the guy and walking down the stairs to her car and drove to the trailer and saw the lady run. Meg shot her in the leg before getting out of the car and walking over to the lady kneeling down beside her grabbing her hand.

"You are the spawn of Satan. You and that Godfrey boy, you will destroy everything you touched." The lady grit out at Meg who just cackled.

"Too bad you won't be around to see it. I guess a match made in hell right? Oh well. It's not let Estelle can stop me. She's weak. Always has been." Meg stated and she then touched the sides of the lady's head seeing a strong power and she smirked. "Maybe a parting gift from you to me." Meg shrugged and she then sucked the aura out of the lady making her scream loudly and she sucked the soul as well and the lady went lip dead. Meg grinned and then walked back to her car and got in it driving back to her apartment. A few weeks later a knock came at her apartment door and Meg opened it looking at Roman. She smirked. "Sorry Estelle isn't here can I take a message?" Meg asked him and he narrowed his eyes grabbing her by the throat throwing her across the room. Meg rolled over landing on her feet crouched down.

"Bring Estelle back." Roman growled walking forward dangerously and Meg gave him a throaty laugh.

"I've been waiting too long to be out. No way in hell." Meg snarled. "Besides what makes you think she wants to come back. You don't love her." Meg put it simply grabbing her gun playing with it. Roman narrowed his eyes.

"Yes I do." Roman spat dangerously pouring himself a drink. Meg laughed loudly.

"You don't love her you just want to hurt her. But we would be such a better couple. You know even if you get rid of me I still have the final say on her decisions. You can get rid of me but I'll always be there." Meg stated lighting a cigarette and then shooting him in the arm making him look at her unimpressed. He then walked up to her grabbing her hair and pushing her against the wall. She laughed looking up at him pulling him closer.

"She's better than you." Roman growled pushing her to the ground. Meg smirked and tripped him over and crawled on top of him manipulating hi emotion to lust and he leaned up and closed his eyes. "I am a warrior." Roman reminded himself. He then grabbed her by the neck giving her a rough lip bruising kiss looking her in the eyes. "Bring Estelle back." Roman commanded her controlling her mind.

"She sees it all Roman." Meg laughed before closing her eyes she then switched back to Estelle. Estelle looked up at him wide eyes and Roman hugged her quickly and she held him close to herself. She then moved away from Roman sensing something different about him.

"What are you?" Estelle asked him confused. Roman smiled down at her moving some hair out of her face.

"Uipr. I'll explain it to you later. Come on you need to go to bed." Roman helped her picking her up and placing her in the bed. He then went and checked on Finn smiling at how peaceful he looked. "You know my mother, she like um hypnotised me to rape Letha so that she could have my child. Um pretty fucked up right?" Roman asked trying to cover up how bad he felt. Estelle turned to him her eyes looking him up and down.

"I know. I saw." Estelle informed him and Roman then sat down next to her.

"Do you still love me?" Roman asked her boldly. Estelle sat up and looked over at him.

"Yes." Estelle whispered and Roman looked over at her nodding in understanding and he brushed some hair out of her face. He then leaned closer to her looking her in the eye.

"Turn your heart to steel." Roman whispered he then took Estelle's face in his hands bringing her face to his their lips meeting roughly. He then moved her down to the bed and kissed her again the two soon making love much to the pain of Estelle who's first time it was. She pushed through the pain. As the two were lying in the bed Estelle played with his hair.

"I don't want a boyfriend." Estelle whispered and Roman chuckled.

"Not much has changed I see. It's okay why did you let me?" Roman asked her confused. Estelle chuckled.

"Meg something she told me. Life isn't ruled by virtue; our conscious is." Estelle muttered more to herself than to him. Roman looked at her confused for a moment before nodding.

"Then I guess you have it all figured out. I'm sorry if it hurt." Roman apologised hissing her temple. Estelle nodded getting up and leaning against the wall lighting a cigarette.

"Get out please Roman." Estelle whispered and Roman nodded grabbing his jacket and walking out of the apartment. Estelle ran her hands through her hair and walked to the shower her legs hurting every step of the way. Cleansing herself scrubbing her body until it hurt.


	8. Chapter 8

A month later Estelle walked up the stairs to her apartment to find Peter waiting in front of her door. Estelle looked at him shocked and walked up to him. "Peter you back in town?" Estelle asked shocked and Peter looked at her with a sheepish smile.

"Not for long. I need money I was hoping you'd talk to Roman. My mother is in jail." Peter begged her and Estelle leaned against the hall wall and looked over at him.

"I haven't talked to him in two months Peter. He isn't good for me or Finn." Estelle informed him with a broken gleam in her eyes. Peter then took in her appearance. She looked gaunt, her hair in a bun looked unkempt and her eyes red with bags under her eyes. She looked sick.

"Are you okay?" Peter asked her taking notice of her. Estelle shook her head with a frown.

"I'm fine Peter. I've just been sorting out things." Estelle informed him walking over to her apartment and Peter followed her.

"Please, can you try?" Peter begged and Estelle looked back at him with sad eyes.

"Of course." Estelle whispered and she then walked back inside hearing Finn cry. Estelle cleaned herself up and took Finn with her to see Roman. Knocking on his door a few times. It opened and Estelle walked in looking up at Roman who when he saw her looked shocked. He walked downstairs to where she was and looked at Finn with a soft smile. Estelle nodded and he took Finn in his arms holding him close.

"Why are you here? You told me to leave." Roman stated as he looked at Finn with a smile.

"Just sorting through my multiple personality disorder. Meg was only the first. I need some money for my apartment I don't have enough money for food and the rent and the bills." Estelle almost begged and Roman looked at her with pity and then looked away. Roman then walked forward staring her down.

"No you don't. You are keeping on top of rent, good food, I know because you think most of the food is complimentary it's because I buy it. I've been keeping tabs on you Estelle. So don't come begging for Peter. Don't come around again if it's for him." Roman spat at her handing Finn back and then turning away from her. Estelle nodded in understanding and then walking to her car driving home. Estelle clutched her head in pain watching Roman kill a man drinking his blood, then lighting a cigarette walking out without a care in the world. Estelle hadn't been able to control her powers over the few months. They'd been going crazy. She kept seeing death and pain. Seeing the ghosts of those who'd died. She'd had enough of death. The messenger of death. That's what Meg called it. Estelle watched Finn carefully. He'd grown a fair bit in a short amount of time. She thought he was beautiful. Estelle was feeding him when he threw the food away and Estelle smiled chuckling and then she went picking up the spoon and cleaned it. Finn started crying loudly banging his hands on the table and Estelle ran over to him.

"Mummy" Finn cried out reaching for her and Estelle picked him up and holding him close.

"That's right. I'm your mummy." Estelle soothed him placing him down and then went to finish feeding him. Estelle then checked her watch cursing as she grabbed her brother and walked down stairwell and to her car driving off to the hospital. Her doctor. When she walked in there she sat down on the table.

"How long has it been since your last period?" Her doctor asked looking at her notes. Estelle thought back to it and sighed.

"Two months around about." Estelle tried to remember off the top of her head.

"Um look we'll run a few tests and if we can see anything we'll come back to you immediately. We do have the medication for your multiple personality disorder." The doctor handed it to her before doing a blood test. The next day Estelle waited for her doctor and her doctor looked at the baby in her arms. "Yours?"

"No my mothers. She left us a while ago. Father was never there to begin with. What news do you have?" Estelle asked hopeful it wasn't what she thought it was.

"You are not pregnant if that is what you are thinking." Her doctor told her with a kind smile. Estelle sighed in relief and hugged onto Finn kissing his cheek excited.

"Hear that Finn, oh thank god. What's wrong this is great news?" Estelle cheered looking at her confused. The doctor frowned looking down guilty. She'd always hated the idea of breaking this news.

"I'm sorry to tell you this Miss Tregetour but in your life you will find it very unlikely to every conceive a child. In fact I'd have to say from the tests you won't ever be able to have one." Her doctor gave her the bad news watching Estelle closely. Estelle looked at the doctor shocked her eyes went wide and Estelle then got up handing Finn to the doctor before looking to the doctor.

"I'll be back I um I need a moment. Sorry." Estelle apologised in barely a whisper. She then opened the door with her bony fingers and walked out of the hospital as quickly as she could Estelle leaned against the wall of the hospital building taking in a deep breath looking out into the distance. Estelle she didn't know how to process this. Her whole life, that's all she'd wanted to be. She wanted to be a mother. She wanted to love something the way a child deserved to be loved. The way she could never be loved. She wanted to have a perfect family. She couldn't have that. Why was it people like Terry and Jacob could have children and she couldn't? Estelle wiped the tears away from her face taking in a shaky breath. Estelle sat down on the ground holding her legs close to her chest sitting there numbly for a long moment. Estelle thought back to the Godfrey institute remembering Pryce and his experiments that she saw Roman being involved in in the not too distant future in her visions. Estelle brushed some hair out of her face getting in her car and driving off to the institute and seeing Pryce there.

"Hello Miss Tregetour. Why may I ask is a seer visiting me?" Pryce asked with a smirk walking closer to her. Estelle looked away from him with a frown.

"I was hoping that you may be able to help me with something." Estelle inquired slowly and nervously.

"Oh?"

"I got some tests. Thought I was pregnant. But I found out that I could never have a child. I was hoping you could help me have one. I'd do anything please." Estelle almost begged and Pryce looked at her sternly and nodded in understanding.

"I will help you and I know you have no money so I will be wanting to run some tests on you. As a return from my favour to you. I will send you papers about it." Pryce informed her with a nod. Estelle took note of this leaving the institute and going into her car driving back to the hospital picking up Finn and having a relaxing evening. The next morning Estelle woke up to her phone ringing. Groaning and reaching out to answer it she laid on her back looking up at her roof reaching out to stroke Finn's hair.

"Hello Miss Tregetour I called to see if you were okay. I can understand this was a big blow for you and I have arranged for you so see someone about it. Especially for some such as yourself who always wanted children, I thought it best you see a professional about it." Her doctor informed her worried. Estelle then sat up rubbing her temples.

"I'm fine quack. Really, it's not a big deal." Estelle tried to brush it off knowing she couldn't let anyone know about Pryce and what she was doing for him.

"In two hours you have a schedule booked and paid for. First one on me because of the circumstances. This is it." Her doctor informed her calmly hanging up. Estelle groaned lying down in bed for a long moment. After another hour of sleep Estelle got herself and Finn ready and she then drove to Roman's house knocking on the door. A blonde in a leather jacket answered and looked at her wide eyed.

"Are you his girlfriend?" The girl asked way too quickly. Estelle pursed her lips shaking her head.

"No and before you guess this isn't his kid. It isn't even mine this is my little brother. Anyway is he here?" Estelle asked walking in looking around. The girl closed the door and then Roman walked up to them and he looked down at Estelle.

"What are you doing here? Begging for your friend?" Roman growled out and Estelle shook her head.

"I need you to look after Finn for a while. I have some things to do Roman and I don't want to put him in danger." Estelle informed him hoping he would. Roman sighed reaching out holding Finn looking down at Estelle not saying a word. "Um it was good seeing you." Estelle muttered turning away from him going to walk away. Miranda looked over at Roman who just stood there for a long moment.

"Who was that?" Miranda asked looking at the baby with a smile. Roman sighed handing the baby to a maid who walked off.

"An old friend who hates me now." Roman spat walking off. Estelle then made it into the office of the person she was supposed to see and noticed Norman sitting there looking over a large file. Estelle sat down opposite him confused. Norman then looked over at her sitting up still looking at the file.

"This is your file. Says you spent your 13th birthday in a mental hospital because your mother forced you to stay there while she was out of town. Your father ran out when you were 9, your mother was barely there and you are currently raising your little brother. Not legally. Um decent grades, enough to get into a good place, get out of here. But you didn't. There are a couple run ins with the law stealing kitchen supplies and a few other things from the people you've seen as well as medical records. Just thought I'd let you know. So we are here to talk about you. You can't have children how does that make you feel?" Norman asked after a long explanation of her life. Estelle looked at her hands and twitched her thumbs.

"It doesn't matter." Estelle muttered looking away from him. Norman sighed annoyed.

"Fine, well how about we start with something easier. Your brother Finn. What do you think of him?" Norman asked her looking down at his bored. Estelle smiled looking up at Norman brightly.

"He's my world. I love him so much and he's the most important person in my life." Estelle informed him fondly and Norman nodded.

"I know. How you feel towards your brother it's unhealthily resembled the way a mother feels to their child. He is your brother. But due to the live events. It is understandable. How about anyone else you have that is special in your life?" Norman inquired.

"I used to have Roman Godfrey, Valerie Hartley and Ashley but Valerie was killed. Ashley left off to do better things for a while and Roman…I can't be around him right now." Estelle informed Norman calmly and he nodded.

"I see well I do urge people in your position to maybe go out and reconcile with some of your demons. You don't seem emotionally unstable but it says you have multiple personality disorder. Look I can't help you if you won't help yourself. You can't have children and I'm afraid not even Pryce may be able to help you with this. He's focused on bringing lives back and changing the internal structure not helping women become fertile." Norman explained to her making Estelle looked at him worried. "This isn't a dream Estelle you need to face reality or someone else will do it for you." Norman stated coolly. Estelle's bony hand moved up to her chin clutching it softly looking around the room and then to the clock.

"Of course. I know. I um I have work right now." Estelle stammered getting up and running out of the building. Estelle clutched her head in pain as she saw flashes of Shelly running from Christina wolf and she then shook it off taking a joint out lighting it and walking to her car driving off to her home. Estelle then picked up the box under her bed and took it out to the coffee table and opened it showing weapons, guns, knives, sickles and a few other things. Meg had taken over for two weeks once. She's stored up on weapons and decided to join a mercenary group. Estelle got a mirror out showing the mirror a gun and then she saw Meg moving and a smirk grew on Meg's face.

"Going dark Estelle? Never thought I'd see sunshine princess doing that." Meg snarled laughing loudly. Estelle looked around not wanting to admit anything.

"I'm not going dark. Look I just I need your guts. Pryce, he needs something from me. I know it's more than just my blood or whatever. He'll want me to kill anything that could hurt him because I can see it coming. I need you to merge with me. Please." Estelle begged Meg trying to refrain from being overemotional. Meg howled with laughter and held her hand up.

"Only for you cutie but I want more of a say in things than I usually do." Meg bargained reaching out grabbing Estelle making Estelle scream loudly feeling excruciating pain. Estelle fell to her knees heaving. Estelle crawled up reading the contract with Pryce signing it and then getting out her gun loading it and closing her eyes. She walked downstairs getting in her car before she drove off to a house walking up and breaking into the house and walking into the kitchen breaking the gas pipe and then sparking a fire near it as an explosion came Estelle ran out of the house and got in her car watching as the house exploded and she then sped off back to her house. As she fell into a peaceful sleep a dream came to her mind.

 _Shelly was running through a tunnel with a white wolf chasing her feral growling. Shelly looked back her eyes desperate to get out. To not be hurt. As she stopped reaching down to grab something the wolf walked closer to her dangerously growling and then jumped at Shelly who hit the wolf in the head over and over again blood splattering over her face an d then Shelly tore the head of and split it into two and walked off running to an abandoned house which was a mess and climbing into the basement of it._

Sitting up Estelle cracked her neck getting up from her seat and washing the sweat off her forehead. Grabbing her phone she going to message Roman but stopped. She placed the phone down pouring herself a glass of vodka before walking to have a bath. She placed her glass of vodka beside the bath and did a line of cocaine before knocking back the vodka howling with laughter. Closing her eyes her eyes turned a foggy white and she saw Roman drinking the blood of his horse and going on a killing spree. She then saw the death of his friend that was living with him. Estelle's eyes went back to normal and she laughed to herself pouring herself another glass.


	9. Chapter 9

The next day Estelle was in the building and Pryce smiled to her. "Hello we'll start by taking some blood and skin samples." Pryce informed her holding her lower back directing her towards where they were supposed to be going. As they were walking down the halls Roman was walking out of the building. Roman looked at her with narrowed eyes before walking away. Estelle took a deep breath in following Pryce.

"Does Roman know what you do?" Estelle inquired genuinely interested. Pryce chuckled.

"No he does not. Not many people do." Pryce informed her with a smile as they got into a section and he took some blood and skin and fingernail clippings and hair samples. Then a scan of her body and brain functions. When they were done Pryce looked and handed her a newspaper. "Burnt house? I prefer less discreet." Pryce informed her and Estelle looked away.

"I don't want to kill anyone and watch them die." Estelle muttered sternly.

"Get over it. You'll need to kill and watch people die. This procedure it is a lot of money. You'll be my lackey for a while." Pryce informed her before walking away. Estelle watched him leave and her face went dull before walking out of the building driving home. She then got her guns and knives ready. She then walked into her work out room starting practicing to fight. Later that night Estelle saw Roman kill a man near the train tracks. Estelle then got out of her apartment and walked to where he killed the man. Estelle was leaning against the wall taking a drag of her cigarette as she saw Roman walk in.

"Do you have a family?" His voice quaked and the homeless guy turned around eyes wide.

"Who the fuck are you?" The homeless guy asked. "Oh yeah I seen you earlier. You didn't give me shit. Are you some kind of rich pervert of what?" Estelle stifled a laugh watching the scene amused.

"I need to know do you have a family" Roman tried again with a wad of cash in his hands.

"I got a daughter, she won't talk to me." The homeless guy more or less lied. Estelle had seen his life, he didn't deserve anything good. "What the fucks business is that to you if I have a family?"

"What's her name?" Roman demanded to know. "Where does she live?"

"I ain't telling you shit." He spat.

"I'm not gonna hurt her I promise. I'm gonna help her." Roman informed him.

"Melanie Halgry, phili."

"I'll make sure she is well taken care of." Roman sighed.

"Woah, woah what the fuck man?" The homeless guy exclaimed angrily. Estelle watched from the railings as Roman killed one of the guys drinking his blood. Estelle then got up walking out of the place and waited for Roman near his car. When Roman saw her he paused and his mouth went dry.

"Roman, saw your little midnight snack way before it happened. Don't worry he wasn't a good man." Estelle informed him moving so he could open the car door.

"Get the fuck out of my way. Don't start taking an interest in me now." Roman yelled at her going to open her door.

"I saw Shelly. She's alive Roman. I'll find her. She was my friend as well." Estelle stated with pursed lips. Roman looked to her wide eyes.

"Can you prove it?" Roman asked her and Estelle held out her hand. Roman looked at her confused.

"The closer the contact the more I vividly I can show you and before you ask. No this does not mean I am going to fuck you." Estelle deadpanned grabbing his hand and pulling him closer so that their lips met. After 30 seconds she pushed him away and took a deep breath. She'd shown everything she'd seen. Roman looked at her wide eyed.

"Can you find her? You have to find her!" Roman yelled grabbing her arms and shoving her against the car door roughly. Estelle glared up at him and she then tried to push him away but his grip got stronger.

"Let me go Roman. I'm not one of your guilty pleasures." Estelle spat at him looking up at him with fury in her eyes. Roman then rolled away from her leaning on his car hood.

"Find her; I'll continue to have Finn looked after." Roman informed her stressed out.

"Roman if anything is wrong you can tell me. We aren't as close as we used to be but I do still care about you." Estelle reached out for his shoulder looking into his eyes and he then shook his head.

"Just find Shelly. I need Shelly." Roman grumbled out, standing up straight going to walk into his car.

"Roman ever since you became what you are I've had dreams of you killing too many people. Sort out your shit please." Estelle begged wiping a tear away from her face. Roman looked at her sternly.

"Why do you cry so much? It's annoying." Roman deadpanned.

"I know. It's a work in process. Don't be afraid to call me if you need something. I'm still your friend." Estelle informed him kissing his cheek and walking away from him. Estelle looked into her bathroom mirror having seen another threat to Godfrey industries she looked herself in the mirror again hating what she saw. What would she have to change inside to get her chance at children? How many lives did she have to take? Then the words of Norman ran through her head. Pryce couldn't help her. Estelle tucked a gun into her purse and then walked off to the office of Norman and sat beside him.

"Can I help you Estelle?" Norman asked her packing his belongings.

"What did you mean when you said Pryce couldn't help me?" Estelle inquired quickly watching Norman confused.

"Its common knowledge that the seers of death, the darkest most deranged can only conceive with someone who's done as much bad as them. You see death, you let them die, you have mental issues but there is love in your heart. Find someone who is like that and that will be the father of your children. Read your book." Norman spat at her getting his belongings and walking out of the house. Estelle's face hardened and she wiped the sweat from her forehead and stormed out of the house. She then walked to the alley and saw the person she'd seen in her visions. Walking up to them Estelle punched them in the face and the person looked up at her shocked. Estelle kicked him in the face getting her knife out and plunging it into his chest stabbing him over and over again tears forming in her eyes as she screamed and she then fell back to the ground leaning against the wall running her blood stained hands over her face and through her hair crying and clutching her legs close to her chest. It wasn't fair. Her children her future children, their father would be a monster. Doomed to fail. Estelle stood up looking at the body and then called Pryce and he got someone to clean the mess up. Going home and showering then falling to sleep.

 _A man stood in front of Estelle, she had Finn in her hands and Estelle turned around running for her life as fast as she could looking back at the man with a white mask on his face. Screaming she tried to run as fast as she could clutching Finn close to her. Tripping over Estelle fell to the ground and tried to get up picking Finn up and looking for somewhere to go. Roman then showed up killing the man chasing her and looking at her with blood thirsty eyes going after Finn._

Estelle sat up screaming like a banshee clutching her sheets tightly breathing heavily in and out. Estelle reached out for the joint on her bedside table taking a drag calming herself down and noticing it was daylight out she climbed out of bed and got dressed walking away and into the streets taking a drag of her joint whenever she could. She then walked straight to Roman's house and opened up the door walking in and looking towards the maid with a frown. Roman walked forward over to her and looked down at her.

"You here for Finn?" Roman asked her as they moved to the kitchen and he poured her a glass of vodka and handed it over to her. Estelle took it taking a sip of it.

"No I need to talk to you about something that happened to me." Estelle whispered troubled. Roman looked at her confused.

"What?" Roman inquired. Estelle's mouth went dry and looked around.

"A dream I had. This man with a mask, he was chasing me. And he was trying to kill Finn. I was running away from him and then you showed up, you killed the man and you then you tried to kill Finn." Estelle spoke softly trying to keep herself from crying or anything. Roman looked at her shocked and then walked over to her placing his arms sturdily on her shoulders.

"I'm becoming human. Pryce, he's doing something to me. Making me human. I won't hurt him." Roman half yelled looking to her worried. Estelle nodded in understanding.

"Roman why would you want to be human?" Estelle asked him confused and he walked away from her slamming his hand on the kitchen counter.

"Because it's better than wanting to eat everything in my sight." Roman half yelled at her watching her carefully. Estelle watched him with wide eyes.

"I know. I've seen it all. I'm sorry Roman. I'm happy for you." Estelle whispered walking over to him and she hugged him tightly their foreheads meeting for a long moment breathing each other in like they'd done so many times before. Roman then moved away from her.

"I have someone else." Roman whispered to her and Estelle nodded in understanding.

"…I know. I've seen it." Estelle shared holding him close to her. Roman then ran his hands up and down her back and placed his hands on her face making her look up at him.

"You should sleep here tonight. You can have my bed." Roman offered her. Estelle moved away from him with empty eyes.

"Can I see Nadia?" Estelle asked him almost beggingly and Roman sighed walking upstairs and Estelle followed him to the room and Estelle walked into the room walking over to Nadia and picking her up holding the beautiful baby looking into its blue eyes. Estelle's eyes went foggy white having a vision.

 _Nadia was walking into her bedroom taking off her wedding dress and then going to sit on the big fancy bed she had kicking off her heels. She'd grown into such a beautiful young woman. Finn then walked in not too long after smiling over at her walking and lying on top of her kissing her softly looking her in the eyes longingly. "I love you Nadia Godfrey. You'll never know how amazing it is that you love me back." Finn whispered into her ear kissing her again soon entering into a passionate love making moment._

What did you see?" Roman asked quickly noting that she went into one of her future seeing modes. Estelle put the child down leaning over kissing Nadia on the head and turning back to Roman walking over to him.

"The kind man she marries and her on her wedding day." Estelle informed him and Roman looked at her confused.

"I thought you only saw death." Roman barely got out as they walked downstairs. Estelle chuckled shaking her head.

"No I'm a seer not a messenger of death. I need some sleep Roman I'll see you in the morning." Estelle informed him walking into his bedroom soon lying down watching the roof. Roman walked in not too long after her and lay down next to her and reached for her hands. She turned looking over at him. He watched her looking at her pule which was barely auditable. Roman furrowed his brows hearing a heart murmur or something like it he then clenched his jaws trying to stop himself from thinking about her blood and he looked back to her eyes. He didn't notice how sad they were.

"Do you still love me?" Roman asked her thinking back to the moment when she confessed her feelings for him. Estelle's eyes flicked from his lips back up to his eyes.

"I hope not." Estelle muttered turning away from him. Roman then wrapped his arms around her waist holding her close like they used to when they were children and had sleep overs. Soon falling to sleep. The next morning Estelle woke up alone to the sound of yelling.

"Miranda!" Peter called out and Estelle got dressed and ran out of the bedroom looking at Peter. "Miranda" Peter called out again. Roman grabbed his shoulder and before he knew it Peter punched him in the face causing him to fall back slightly. Roman went and swung at Peter who dodged going to hit Roman again but Roman bent down grabbing Peter by the throat forcing him against the desk roughly and Peter then pushed Roman off pushing him onto the table going to punch Roman again. Roman then punched Peter and got back up tackling him to the couch both of them falling to the ground. Peter then got up going to hit Roman again. Estelle then ran forward pointing a gun at Peter.

"Peter calm the fuck down." Estelle ordered softly and he then sat on the chair holding his head. Estelle then put the gun away looking over at Roman seeing him lying on the ground.

"What's wrong with you?" Roman sighed out looking over at Peter.

"I have no idea" Peter muttered looking Estelle directly in the eye. "You sleeping with her as well?" Peter asked Roman looking to Estelle and Roman sat up looking to Peter.

"I'd never sleep with Godfrey, Peter." Estelle informed him playfully Peter laughed lightly.

"Some things never change." Peter laughed looking at her with a smile and they all turned and Roman sat up hearing the door open and a baby crying. Soon enough Miranda walked forward looking at everyone. "You never said you had a baby" Peter commented.

"It's not my baby." Miranda informed Peter almost awkwardly and Estelle turned to look at Miranda and held her hand out.

"Hi I'm Estelle." She introduced herself and the two shook hands.

"It's Letha's." Roman whispered.

"When were you going to tell me?" Peter asked sitting up angrily and walking over to the baby. "What's her name? What's her name?" Peter asked wanting to know and Roman then looked away for a moment and Estelle sat down next to him.

"It's Nadia." Estelle informed Peter nodding her head.

"It means hope." Miranda handed the baby over to Peter and he took Nadia in his arms smiling down at her.

"You are perfect, I loved your mother you know." Peter whispered lovingly.

"She's tired and she needs to be changed." Miranda informed Peter almost jumping up and down.

"I'll see you soon Nadia." Peter whispered to her not breaking eye contact with her. Kissing her forehead he handed her over to Miranda who took her walking upstairs.

"I wanted to tell you but you split and I didn't know what to do. I needed you, both of you and well you both left me. I was completely fucking lost. I am completely fucking lost. Then Miranda fell out of the sky and it was like I don't know how to explain it" Roman barely got out moving his hands around trying to keep himself slightly busy.

"Were you just planning on hiding this baby forever?" Peter inquired hurt.

"I didn't have a plan. I still don't. There is still so much you don't know." Roman informed Peter hurt. Estelle then moved over sitting next to Peter holding his hand comforting him.

"It's okay there's time. Where would any of us be without our secrets?" Peter asked with a grin patting Estelle and Roman on their upper arms.

"Peter always the accurate to the point of annoying." Estelle nudged him slightly and Peter smirked wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

"Of course but what are friends for?" Peter asked her with a smile and the two hugged tightly.

"Does this mean we are back?" Estelle asked looking between them and Peter held her hand and Roman's while Roman held Peter and Estelle's.

"Yes" Roman answered and Estelle laughed with pure joy as Miranda sat down next to Roman.

"It may be that when we no longer know what to do we have come to our real work. And that when we no longer know which way to go we have come to our real journey. The mind that is not baffled is not employed. The impeded streams is the one that sings. I've always loved that poem. I've never met anyone like you two. Wounded, brave, ridiculous, weird. You have a wild heart Peter. Your tearing yourself up inside and you'll probably end up dead way before your time. You blow my mind. Roman Godfrey born to be king of the universe and inside you are a broken boy. You think it's better to have people fear you. But your heart is crying all the time. At war with yourself, as dark as the inside of love. I can't stop thinking about you. I'd be crazy to not get in my car and be gone. But I am crazy and I'm going to have to live with it." Miranda half ranted like a sad person holding onto Roman and Peter and she then looked to Estelle with a kind smile a knowing smile telling her they'd be talking without the boys. Miranda then got up walking away before turning back. "Well you three coming or what?" Miranda asked with a smile. Peter got up first and Estelle followed him right before Roman followed after her. After their long night the 4 fell asleep with Miranda and Estelle in the middle, Estelle slept next to Roman and Miranda next to Peter. Waking up alone Estelle had gotten used to over her years. She sat up stretching and Miranda walked in and smiled over to her sitting down beside her. "How are you doing? You seemed kind of new at everything." Miranda stated kindly.

"I've only had sex once. Sorry if I'm not the super slut everyone assumes. You seemed like you wanted to talk to me last night. What?" Estelle inquired confused and starting to dress.

"Estelle I don't know you very well. You have a bleeding heart. You'll do what you have to and your heart of darkness it feels pain all around. You are trapped in your sadness Estelle and you'll let your nature consume you." Miranda spoke to her softly holding her hand and Estelle looked over awkwardly before Roman rushed into the room and took Estelle out dragging her out of the house with him and pushed her in the car and drove off.

"It's Shelly they found Shelly. She's hurt." Roman informed Estelle speeding off. Estelle looked over to him wide eyed and broke out into a smile.

"Shit," Estelle muttered not being able to believe it. The two ran into the institute and got in the elevator waiting quietly for a moment. The ride it went too quietly and too slowly.

"So last night." Roman started and Estelle looked over at him with a frown. Estelle looked away from him to the numbers on the elevator. "You really going to pretend that it didn't happen like the last time we slept together" Roman asked angrily his face hardening.

"You told me I must make my heart steel Roman. But thing is I'm not made of steel I'm made of something toxic and my heart is bleeding every time I let some of the darkness in." Estelle almost cried out her eyes finally meeting his. Roman rubbed the back of his neck watching her carefully.

"I'm sorry, I don't say this often enough but I figured I owe it to you." Roman apologised to Estelle who shook her head.

"Today is about Shelly. And you don't owe me anything." Estelle sighed out and the elevator stopped letting Olivia in.

"What are you doing here Olivia? You aren't allowed to be in this building and you need a security pass to get down there." Roman inquired looking over at her.

"What are you doing? Letting Pryce suck away your power because it terrifies you." Olivia bit back with resentment. "Norman called. Asked me to meet him"

"God damn it and I told him I wasn't interested in a family therapy session." Roman spat dryly with a touch of humour. They all then walked out of the elevator and Shelly was rolled around stunning the Godfrey family.

"Thank god you're alright." Olivia sighed out looking to Shelly as Roman walked forward bending down hugging her tightly crying on her shoulder. He moved away looking at her.

"I missed you" Shelly struggled to say looking to Roman who was stunned.

"Did you just?" Roman asked quickly.

"Yep" Norman answered for him proudly.

"Say something" Roman pleaded blissfully happy.

"Roman" Shelly got out.

"Say it again" Roman begged with a grin as Shelly touched the side of his face softly.

"Roman you look tired." Shelly struggled out. Estelle walked forward and hugged Shelly stroking her head with a kind smile.

"I'll sleep because of you. I'll get better now." Roman promised touching her face. Shelly turned to Estelle holding her hand.

"Estelle, I missed you and Finn" Shelly got out shakily making Estelle nod happily.

"He misses you as well Shelly, I promise I'll bring him around to see you." Estelle promised her brushing some hair out of her face. Shelly grinned and then looked up to see Olivia.

"Hello mother" Shelly greeted her and Olivia walked forward touching her face softly.

"Hello darling what happened?" Olivia asked lovingly. "Where have you been?"

"So much to tell you" Shelly told them grinning.

"Oh we want to hear it all." Olivia cried out not bothering to wipe the tears from her face.

"I didn't want anyone to get hurt. I just wanted to-"Shelly begun as she was moved to her hospital bed.

"You did what you had to do you stood up for yourself." Roman muttered proudly.

"You have to help Jason" Shelly half ordered half begged.

"We will, Estelle can find him." Roman assured her.

"You are very brave I'm proud of what you did for that little boy" Olivia spoke kind words looking at her daughter as if she was the most precious thing alive.

"Norman left the building you can cut the mummy act." Roman scowled glaring over at Olivia.

"I know I have not always been demonstrative a product of my European upbringing no doubt but it doesn't mean I can't strive to be a better mother for the both of you. I want us to be a family again." Olivia tried reaching out to grab Shelly's hand but Roman grabbed her wrist shoving it away.

"She hasn't changed." Roman spat angrily glaring at Olivia.

"She's my daughter" Olivia argued.

"I won't watch you prey on her." Roman spat.

"I'm comforting her" Olivia stated.

"You're leading her on you never once cared about her." Roman half yelled. Estelle then pushed Roman back slightly.

"Calm down you two. Look you are here for Shelly so act like it and stop making this about you." Estelle tried to explain to them sitting down again.

"Estelle is right both of you out. Estelle if I could have a word with you." Pryce asked for her and Roman, Olivia and Shelly looked at her oddly as Estelle walked out of the room with Pryce.

"Anything?" Estelle asked.

"At this rate your DNA is remarkable so was your brain scan but I don't want to explain the boring to you. About your fertility right now there is not enough we can do for you but I assure you that time will come in the meantime please do your job you've been neglecting as of late." Pryce informed her and Estelle looked at him with a frown before moving and walking away from him. Estelle then took the notes looking over them before walking out to the elevator and going and waiting outside for Roman. He walked out handing her the keys to his car.

"Come back when I call you. Bring Finn she wants to see him." Roman ordered before walking back inside. Estelle rolled her eyes throwing the cigarette away before getting in the car and driving to her apartment. Closing her eyes seeing herself kill a man who lived in his big penthouse apartment. Estelle took the daggers from there and a gun knowing her aim was shit. She then got in the car driving off to the building. She then walked in and to the penthouse hall. She then began being shot at. Estelle ducked out of the way as they began shooting her getting her gun out she shot a few times missing 3 and getting them 1 time. She then ran over to them getting out some knives and sliding down avoiding the bullets and tapping into Meg's brilliance of violence and slashing at their legs and blood splattering onto her and then she got up twisting around and slashed both of their necks and blood spraying on her face and hair. Turning around she got out her gun shooting the guard that opened the door and then she shot at a few other people and walked forward to see the man she was supposed to kill.

"I see the messenger of death is already embracing the darkness inside of her heart." He cackled walking forward. "Go ahead cut out my heart. Your kind loves that." He grit through his teeth. Estelle looked at him wide eyes and unwilling. Something inside of her made her grab her dagger and she stabbed the guy in the chest cutting out his heart she squashing it with her hand she dropping the remains to the ground. She then turn around and walked away out of the penthouse and into the car driving off to hers and washing off the blood and then she walked back into her room to get changed and she saw her mirror and instead of seeing her she saw Meg trying to reach out to her. Estelle grabbed her small bin and threw it against the mirror and then punched it over and over again until there was no mirror left. When Estelle got to the house she walked up the stairs and into a room where Finn was sitting next to Nadia the two looking at each other. Estelle walked up to him and picked Finn up holding him close and laughing lightly.

"You are so good Finn. You are loved. I'm sorry I have not been around but I'm going to do something bad. I see it in my dreams Finn. You are too good for this world. Too good. I love you." Estelle whispered kissing his forehead before putting him down watching them. She then walked out and got changed into something close to the body and she turned seeing the broken mirror touching it her mind flashing with an image of Roman head butting it. Estelle then walked out and got into her car looking at the weapons in the back driving off.


	10. Chapter 10

Once she made it to the next town over she walked into the fancy house looking up at it. If you'd ask her why she was here? Couldn't answer that. If you asked her what she was doing? She wouldn't answer that. She'd had a taste of the darkness inside of her heart. Now the only thing she could do was thrive off it. Getting her gun out the darkness in her eyes shining she walked inside shooting at the close by guards and then shooting at the chandelier 5 times before she shot the chain making it fall on men who were running towards her. Estelle then re-loaded the gun and then shot a few more people before throwing the gun away getting her knives out. Estelle took a deep breath her eyes turning a foggy white and letting something dark and deranged take over her body as the it intoxicated her body, her spirit, her soul and her mind. Estelle ran forward not in control of her movement as she threw the knives at people's throats not directly hitting them but getting close enough for a kill. She then ran and slid on the ground tripping one of the men over slashing his throat all over her face, the blood spilling off her face into her hair and onto the ground. She got back up and felt her leg being shot and she cried out in pain letting more of the darkness engulf her being and running over jumping up to the banner holding onto it kicking a man in the face and then jumping down stabbing him in the forehead before getting up. Looking around Estelle ran up going to cut one of them who grabbed her arm throwing her to the ground and Estelle rolled away from his shoe about to squash her face and she tripped him over and as he was falling she slashed his face and then felt a shot in her shoulder. Estelle let more of the darkness in her finding it addictive and soon blacked out from what she was doing. Three hours later Estelle regained her conscious looking around she got up and walked outside of the room she was in Estelle looked around the house seeing dead bodies, there was so much blood. Estelle felt sick to her stomach. Looking in the mirror she saw Meg and walked over to her.

"Oh honey look at what you did," Meg taunted her with a knowing smirk and crossed arms. Estelle looked around taking a deep breath in pushing the tears away.

You did this what did you do!" Estelle accused tears falling as she watched Meg hatefully. Meg howled with laughter shaking her head.

"Honey this wasn't me. I mean you're fighting skills obviously are mine. You are a pathetic human being you couldn't have done this. You don't get it honey. You are the messenger of death Estelle. Not me. Hell I'm the fucking fairy god mother compared to who you really are. The darkness inside of you, you got a taste huh? How'd it feel? Are you addicted to it?" Meg sneered laughing loudly making Estelle inch back shaking her head.

"No, no I'm not I am not. I can't be. I'm not the messenger of death. You are. You are the bad person." Estelle called out unconvinced. Meg howled with laughter tilting her head and popping out her hip.

"Once you have one taste you can't get enough of it. Looks like you'll be as bad as your parents. Maybe worse. Have a fun life with a heart of darkness." Meg stated tauntingly. Estelle screamed loudly blocking the voice of Meg from her ears. Her eyes turned a foggy white and she let some of the darkness of her power in grabbing a chair near her and throwing it at the mirror screaming again before running out to the car driving home wondering the whole way why was she there. How did she get there? Why was she like this? On her way home Roman called her and Estelle answered putting it on loud speaker.

"Roman, what's going on?" Estelle asked trying to make herself sounding okay. Thankfully Roman didn't notice a damn thing.

"Miranda, she took Nadia and Finn." Roman confessed and Estelle paused for a moment. "Estelle" Roman called out but Estelle saw someone on the road. Swerving out of the way she rolled her car 4 times and thrown out of the car. Lying on the ground Estelle stumbled up to her feet seeing a man in a white mask. Estelle's eyes went wide as it was close to her and kicked her to the ground as she skid her arm on the ground crawling to her feet again as the person punched her in the face and she bumped into the car looking at him with fear as it got out the gun aiming it at her Estelle fell as the gun shot went off and she looked up at him her eyes widened in fear and her legs psychosomatically paralysed. Scrambling to her feet she went to run away but the persons arms went around her body and threw her to the ground.

"I don't want to hurt you!" Estelle screamed her voice filled with anguish as her face scrunched up in pain. The person chuckled grabbing her by the throat getting a knife out as she kicked him in the groin and then got the knife from him stabbing him in the chest over and over again finding the keys to his car and throwing his belongings out driving as quickly as she could to Roman's house. As she drove flashes of a priest showing up in her mind with arrows in him pinned to the stairwell dead. Brushing it off she answered the call that Peter sent her way.

"Was Finn born with a caul? A weird thing on the face?" Peter rushed to ask her.

"Yes he was. Why?" Estelle asked before Peter hung up. Estelle hit the dashboard angrily. "Fucking asshole." Estelle spat. An hour later Estelle finally made it back to Roman's house. Walking into the house she slammed the door shut and started walking up the stairs when she saw Peter look at her shocked.

"What the fuck happened to you?" Peter asked her confused. Estelle rubbed her eyes continuing up the stairs as her mouth went dry.

"I just had an accident." Estelle lied and Peter grabbed her arm.

"Not with that much blood." Peter spat and Estelle pushed him away.

"My sins are just that Peter. Mine." Estelle walked forward going to the bathroom but Estelle walked into the nursery checking on Finn seeing him fast asleep next to Nadia and she smiled looking down at the sleeping angels. She touched their foreheads with her blood stained hands that were dried out. She then turned seeing Roman and she knelt beside him and kissed his lips softly looking at him. He looked so peaceful sleeping. Not like he was when he was alive. Estelle pressed her forehead softly against his breathing him in like she'd done so many times before. "Yes, I do still love you Roman I never stopped." Estelle whispered softly. Kissing his forehead she got up walking to the bathroom and scrubbed off the layer and a half of blood from her face and body and skin and then washing it from her hair sitting down in the shower finding a certain type of peace that she'd never felt before like the water was washing away her sins. She knew she'd gone too far. It didn't matter now. She saw the visons and killed them. She didn't know why she killed them. She just thought she had to because she saw them die. When she got out she saw Roman standing in front of her in the bathroom watching her intensely. He then walked over to her noticing the blood still stained in her hair.

"What'd you do?" Roman inquired calmly.

"What I thought I had to do. Please don't die be careful." Estelle whispered kissing his cheek and Roman smiled scoffing.

"You too Stella. I need you." Roman confessed hatingly kissing her forehead leaning his forehead on hers and she then held onto him for a moment placing her hands lightly on the base of his neck the two breathing each other in with their eyes closed for a long moment. Miranda watched from the open door confused. Estelle had never shown much interest for Roman in her eyes. Miranda always thought they were more like siblings than lovers. But she saw this. She'd seen them do it before. It seemed something like a ritual when they were afraid they'd lose each other. Miranda noticed they wouldn't be letting go of each other any time soon so she walked down to her bedroom as the two took their time. After a while they pulled away from each other and Estelle brushed his face with her thumb before walking past him to her bedroom. The whole night dreaming about Peter getting tortured. The next morning Estelle launched out of bed trying to find Peter somehow. Peter then called her and she answered as quickly as she could.

"Peter where the fuck have you been?" Estelle asked him worried.

"Just meet me at Roman's house." Peter ordered hanging up.

"Mother fucker." Estelle cussed putting her phone away and getting herself a whole glass of vodka on the rocks cursing as Peter always hung up on her for no reason. When Peter got to the house her and Miranda helped him to the couch and soon enough a knock came at the door Estelle opened it and saw a brown haired girl standing there. "Destiny?" Estelle asked unsure. She nodded handshaking Estelle.

"Yep and you must be Estelle. Wish I met you sooner. One met one seer in my life and he was utterly pathetic." Destiny laughed and then patched up Peter up. Estelle stood a bit away from them smoking a cigarette waiting for them to give the verdict and they didn't want Estelle smoking near them.

"We need to get him to a hospital." Miranda stated as a matter of fact.

"No." Peter rejected the idea. The doorbell rang and Destiny ran to the door and then walked back in with an old man.

"I'll be back Peter gotta take a piss." Estelle informed everyone walking up the stairs to the bathroom popping some pain medication while on the toilet. Downstairs Estelle heard shots and smashing of glass downstairs and got a knife from her boots hiding behind the corner she took a deep breath in her eyes turning a white foggy colour and the darkness consuming her as the door opened she stabbed the masked man in the face and kicked him to the ground and then ran to Peter who was being attacked and she tackled him to the ground and he head butt her and grabbed her throat trying to kill her. Estelle slit his throat open and then kicked the other one but he pushed her against the wall about to kill her when Roman showed up killing him with his axe and she fell down next to Peter breathing heavily.

"Where are Miranda and the babies?" Roman demanded to know as Peter looked up freaked out. "Get them and get the hell out of here." Roman called out to Peter who took off. He then grabbed Estelle up and pushing her out of the room. Estelle fell to the ground as saw Roman beating the shit out of another one and he tore his throat open drinking the man dry and he then ran back up to the room where the babies were. Estelle then passed out falling to the ground. When Estelle woke up and stretched standing up and walking over to the kitchen pouring herself a drink when Peter walked up to her.

"Estelle what was that white foggy thing going on with your eyes?" Peter snapped with Roman behind him. Estelle looked up at them uncaringly knocking back the rest of her drink.

"Sorry Estelle isn't here can I take a message?" Meg asked pouring herself another drink.

"Meg let Estelle back in." Roman ordered. Meg then rolled her eyes.

"Fine but you asked for the whiny bitch." Meg shrugged closing her eyes and then Estelle came back and looked between the two and lit a joint.

"Meg doesn't do joints she does heroin." Estelle informed the two boys who nodded. "The white thing in my eyes well it's my seer side. Messenger of death and all. My nature is to be evil to bring death. The seer thing it has this darkness that I can feed on it's sort of like blood for you Roman. I crave it and it never fills up. I had a taste and I can't stop. I'm not me when I let it in but whatever." Estelle explained to them shrugging. Roman and Peter then looked to each other awkwardly.

"Whatever come and help us load up the truck with the dead bodies." Roman ordered brushing it off and walking outside. Estelle then followed him next to Peter.

"How is Finn?" Estelle asked quickly.

"Alive, Nadia wouldn't let him go." Peter informed her brining a smile to Estelle's lips as they made it outside in the cold. Estelle then with the help of Peter chucked one of the people into the van and it went on like that for a while. They were then at the last one and Estelle waited looking between the two and back to into the van.

"Now what?" Roman asked looking at the guys bleeding neck. Peter then shook his head grumbling. Roman then looked down punching the guy again.

"He's not gonna get any deader." Peter deadpanned squinting. Roman then shrugged and they lifted him up and threw the corpse into the van. Estelle closed the doors and locked it.

"What's the plan now?" Estelle inquired lighting a cigarette taking a drag from it.

"I have no fucking clue." Roman stated taking her cigarette and taking a drag handing it to Peter who took it taking a drag as well and they handed it back to Estelle.

"Brilliant." Estelle shrugged throwing her cigarette away as the two boys walked inside of the house. Estelle soon followed looking around.

"Who did?" Roman asked taking the gloves and throwing them on the ground. Estelle took hers off placing them in the bin.

"Nadia" Miranda spoke softly scrubbing the ground. "And then he just dropped dead" Miranda quaked with fear.

"You said you wacked the guy with a snow globe right?" Roman asked looking down at her. Destiny then looked over at Estelle who poured herself a glass of vodka and noted she'd have to move to something else due to there being no more. "The guy probably died of a brain haemorrhage or something." Roman tried to come up with something.

"I hate you. I hate all of you" Miranda spat looking between all of them. "We'll be lucky if we don't spend the rest of our lives in jail."

"Why don't we take a moment and be grateful." Destiny asked looking over at Peter. "That we're all alive." The old maid then looked over at Destiny crying. "Well most of us"

"He was a good Christian man. He deserves a proper burial." The maid looked up at Roman crying.

"Of course." Roman agreed his eyes meeting Peter's for a long moment.

"You lied to me!" Miranda yelled at them. "I watched you turn into a wild animal. And you I don't even know what you are." Miranda yelled with fear looking between Peter and Roman and her eyes landed on Estelle. "And you, you are just a monster. You three are monsters and, and this" Miranda dramatically gestured to the scene in front of everyone.

"What happened happened Miranda the world that you thought only existed in bad dreams you are living in it right now. And it's never going to go back to the way it was." Destiny tried to sooth the blonde girl in front of her who was on the verge of crying.

"Okay it's all over. It'll be okay" Peter tried to sooth her touching her shoulder but she pushed him away.

"But what if they come back?" Miranda asked freaked out.

"They won't they're dead. All of them." Peter assured Miranda.

"I wanna go home." Miranda whimpered scrunching up her gloves and holding her first close to her face as if she were praying. Peter placed his hand on her shoulder comfortingly.

"We need you, Nadia needs you. Let's just sit down and relax." Peter pulled her closer to him soothing her better than anyone in the house could.

"You gonna help mop up?" Destiny asked. Estelle scoffed.

"Getting down on hands and knees scrubbing with bleach? I'd sooner drink the bleach." Estelle scoffed knocking back her drink and going outside for a smoke. Not too long later Estelle was sitting in her bedroom with Finn in front of her and she looked at him sadly brushing some of his hair away from his face. "You know I love you right?" Estelle asked sitting him on her lap and Finn nodded reaching out for her.

"Mummy" He giggled making her smile fondly stroking his face.

"I know I know. I am your mother. I'm sorry for the sins I have committed. I hope you never find out about them but if you ever do all I hope is that you forgive me. Life is not rules by virtue only the conscious is." Estelle whispered kissing his temple and lying down falling asleep with him by her side.

"Miranda?" Destiny asked walking into her room. Estelle sat up looking at Destiny confused.

"Not even a letter right." Estelle stated getting up from her bed holding Finn and taking him with her with Destiny downstairs


	11. Chapter 11

She then drive off to Ashley's house and knocked on the door. Ashley looked at her with a bright grin. "Hi Stella it's been a while oh Finn looks so cute." Ashley cheered and Estelle nodded.

"I need you to take Finn out of here for a while. Until I say he can come back. I'm in some trouble. I love you Ashley and I love you Finn." Estelle whispered hugging Ashley who agreed and took Finn away with her. Estelle then watched as Ashley drove off with Finn and she closed her eyes her eyes they didn't go a foggy white but she did feel the darkness taking over her. Getting in her car she drove off to the white tower. Estelle then ran up to the start of the building with Peter and Destiny.

"Estelle" Peter looked at her shocked and he then hugged her and they waited for Roman to come and let them in. He then took them to the elevator and walked them down the halls to a white metal railing that looked vaguely like a prison.

"Whatever bad mojo you saw in your dream nobodies coming down here." Roman informed them walking down some stairs with Destiny, Peter and Estelle following after him. "Miranda" Roman called out walking into a room and seeing blood all over one of the glass cages. Estelle then waited as Roman told off a guard and looked for Miranda. Estelle closed her eyes seeing Miranda falling from the building to her death. Shaking it off and looking to the side she didn't know what to do. She would always let what happened in her visions happen. She followed the group as they passed Norman with his heart ripped out. She couldn't help up feel sorry for him. After all he was her shrink. She continued following and followed as Peter ran away from the group past level six.

"Hey cuz you okay?" Destiny asked.

"That dream when we were at your place," Peter stopped and hit Roman two times on the shoulder.

"The roof" Roman whispered before running over to the entrance to the roof with the three others in tow. Roman led the pack as the tallest he was skipping at least three steps. When they had finally made it to the roof they all shouted Miranda.

"You don't want to do this" Destiny stated trying to get Miranda to stop who looked down at Nadia pensively.

"Don't hurt the baby" Roman yelled desperately as Miranda inched back and Roman opened the gate.

"All I ever did was love you. They should have killed me instead." Miranda cried out.

"Give her to me" Roman reached out through the gate for the baby.

"You were born an angel and I turned you into a monster." Miranda whimpered looking down at Nadia ignoring everyone else.

"Miranda get back here." Roman begged.

"I never meant to hurt you. Everything is going to be okay." Miranda assured Nadia nodding.

"Listen to me listen to me get back here" Roman cried out his voice breaking.

"You'll see your real mum soon." She cried out one last time her eyes bleeding tears as she inched back falling off the roof with Nadia. Estelle screamed watching wide eyes as Miranda fell with Nadia. Something reached out to grab Nadia and Miranda and flew in front of them screaming and looking up at the sky then flying away. After staying up there for a long moment Peter and Roman went off to talk about their next move while Estelle saw Valerie's dead spirit right in front of her running out of the building. Estelle watched as Valerie ran and considered for a long moment if she'd run after her or not. Six weeks later Estelle was helping Roman clean up his home. Roman was standing in Nadia's room playing with her belongings. Estelle walked in leaning against the door.

"You'll get her back soon Roman." Estelle assured him with a stony expression. Roman didn't turn back to her until Estelle reached out touching his shoulders and turning him to her.

"You don't know that." Roman shook his head angry at himself. In a deep despair he couldn't shake it.

"I've seen her future Roman. You can't change the future. It is set in stone." Estelle muttered looking up at him. Roman refused to meet his eyes.

"Do I give her away at her wedding?" Roman asked her with a shaky voice. Estelle chuckled leaning forward her forehead resting against his with her hands tracing his jaw and cheek resting there while Roman was limp but resting against her forehead. Estelle gave him a pathetic smile closing her eyes.

"Yes you do. She'll love you forever." Estelle muttered carefully. Roman looked her in the eye at she opened her eyes and he then took her face in his hands and the two breathed each other in and Roman leaned closer his lips meeting hers for a short moment and Estelle then moved away from him and walked out as Roman followed her and the two split away. Estelle sat in the lounge going through some science books she'd got from the library when Peter walked into the house and sat down next to her.

"Hey how you doing?" Peter asked her with a smirk and then he took the book and read the cover. "Sheeit you know I thought you'd stop reading stuff like this in high school." Peter commented on her choice in night reading. Estelle shrugged hitting him on the arm with the book.

"I happen to like books like this. Interesting in my opinion." Estelle stated dryly opening the book back up again. "Where you been?"

"At a bar drinking with Roman. He's off hooking up with a girl. What's the deal with you two?" Peter inquired and Estelle shrugged.

"We kiss, we hug and finally we are just friends" Estelle put it simply looking into the distance for a moment before sighing.

"Yeah that's a load of bullshit. You love him." Peter teased her jabbing her in her ticklish spots. Estelle growled and then jumped on him sitting on his back. "You want to have his babies." As Peter said this Estelle moved away from him and she looked into the distance lighting a joint to take the edge off.

"That's physically impossible for me Peter. No one but you know." Estelle confessed to him looking away from him grabbing her book and going to walk away leaving Peter to look at her shocked. The next morning Estelle was cooking French toast when Peter and Roman walked in and walked over to her. Estelle placed a plate in front of the both of them and narrowed her eyes. "Eat my food." Estelle ordered turning away getting herself a plate. "So boys, especially the giant. How was your night?" Estelle asked turning around and looking at him taking a bite of her food. Roman chuckled looked at her amused. The wideness of her eyes as she waited for an answer. She must have been used to him not being with her but still didn't stop her from wanting it.

"Got a blow job from some girl. I um I saw a beautiful girl. Drop dead gorgeous. I was thinking of finding her. I don't know she just seemed amazing." Roman gushed like a schoolgirl. Estelle smirked tapping the side of her nose and sliding her finger down looking at Peter who laughed loudly making Roman look at him confused. "What?" Roman exclaimed confused. Peter shook his head and ate some French toast. Estelle then poured herself jack Daniels and orange juice into a big long glass and she then started to drink from it.

"It's 8 in the morning." Peter stated confused at her drinking her hard liquor this early in the morning. Estelle shrugged her shoulders taking a swig.

"It's happy hour somewhere. Besides over the span of the 6 weeks we've all been playing house when have I not been drinking?" Estelle snapped at the two taking her food and walking to the lounge. Roman looked over at Peter who shook his head placing his hands on the bench.

"No way man. She's your best friend not mine." Peter exclaimed and Roman looked at him unimpressed. "Okay fine she's one of my only friends but I took the shit last time." Peter exclaimed and Roman looked at him with furrowed brows. "She can't have children." Peter explained to Roman whose eyes went wide and Roman then dashed over to Estelle sitting down next to her.

"I heard-"Roman was cut off.

"Forget what you heard. It's old news." Estelle muttered coldly. Roman nodded looking over at her.

"Right so um what's with the recent influx of books?" Roman inquired.

"Everyone always told me that I should think about my future before I think about my family. I was just too focused on raising someone how I should have been raised. Anyway I was going to go back to high school get more credits maybe go off to university or something. I figured if I can't have children I can at least make sure Finn is well looked after." Estelle explained to Roman coolly. Roman nodded as an understanding. He then reached out for her hand which Estelle moved away from quickly and Roman looked at her with a frown. He then grabbed her face pulling her face to his resting their foreheads on each other. Roman's piercing gaze met her insecure gaze and he brushed a tear away from her face.

"You can talk to me Estelle. You always could." Roman assured her. Estelle then held his hands moving away getting up and Roman followed her as she got a vase picking it up and throwing it against the glass on the door smashing it and Estelle then screamed loudly.

"Don't tell me I can talk to you Roman. I've told you I've loved you a total of 3 times and you've never once told me you loved me. I can't talk to you. I never could." Estelle whispered pushing past him picking up her heeled boots and walking out into the snow. Roman clenched his jaw with fury in his cold blue eyes as he stormed up into his room. Loving her and saying he loved her those were two very different things in his mind. Estelle was a whirlwind of trouble that had never left his side since he was 2. Maybe it was because they'd been friends for so long he thought if they became anything more that it'd destroy his life. Destroy them. Estelle drove down the road until she got to the forest and got out and walked down the track until she made it to the river. Standing in front of the river she got out a knife waiting calmly until she saw she was really by herself. Sliding the blade across her palm she took in a deep breath her eyes turning foggy and white feeding on the darkness inside of her power. Once she got her hit she breathed out her cold visible breath coming out of her. Estelle moved away from the tree her eyes opening revealing a dark grey almost black foggy colour in her eyes. Once it was gone Estelle looked around again before walking back to her car and driving back to the Godfrey house. She'd long since sold her apartment. When she got back into the house she walked in looking around at the mess and looked to Roman and then to the pretty brunette.

"Estelle" Roman whispered and Estelle shook her head.

"Not my problem you like kicky shit." Estelle deadpanned walking past him narrowing her eyes at the girl before walking upstairs to her bedroom. Falling to sleep Estelle's nightmares came back. She's stopped having them for a while. But with each step she took into the darkness the more unreliable her restraint came.

 _A girl was running her long blonde hair moving up and down as she sped as fast as she could down the streets of Hemlock Grove. Her long toned legs trying to run down the streets quickly. The girl she wasn't running from anything. Nothing behind her and nothing in front of her to chase. Unattractive sweat beads formed on her face making her hair stick to her skin or the shorter parts of it. The difference between the sweat and desperate tears pooling and escaping from her eyes couldn't be told as she ran. The night was casting down on her, the moon shining and the stars bright as ever. The blonde girl tripped falling against the rough pavement scraping herself bleeding from her arm and face. Looking around paralysed in fear the girl looked up seeing up the girl saw a white wolf snarling at a man who was screaming at the wolf. The wolf ducked his head down ripping out the heart of the man. The man's face was heavily blurred and so was the girls. Nothing to recognise nothing to go by. All that could be heard in the night fall and tragedy was the wolf growling viciously and looking at her angrily before running away as the girl looked over to the man and screamed in anguish her cried filling the air. Getting to her feet falling over a few times she made it over to the man clutching him crying stroking his face. Her forehead leaning on his for a long moment her tears falling on his face. Desperation and cries of bargaining could be heard ad she rested her forehead on his. She wanted him back. Wanted him alive._

Waking up from a dream was always the hard part. That dream had always been hard. This one broke her heart. Because each time she'd felt the pain of them. She'd always felt the pain but she'd never seen such tragedy in death. Never in her life. Estelle getting out of bed walked over to her broken mirror she'd punched over and over again in her life. Her knuckled had bled and she knew she'd never stop it. Always hating what she saw in the mirror because what she saw it wasn't her. Estelle ran her hands over the cracks before she took a joint and lit it putting on some shoes and a winter coat before walking out of the house and driving to the park. When she got there she looked around at all of these children. All so naïve. Estelle could never remember a moment when she'd been so blissfully happy. Her father had been in and out all of her life. He was a good father when he was around. He had loved her, took her around on trips spending all of the family money for the bills whenever he did. As far as she was concerned he only came around when her mother had refilled the money in the house. They'd never had bank accounts. Her mother worked her whole life. Always absent minded Estelle couldn't tell you how many times when she was younger she had to walk home by herself or cook herself dinner, clean and do everything by herself. Estelle's eyes strayed to Shelly wrapping a chain around her neck. Estelle walked forward as she kicked the bin from under her and was shocked when the branch was broken. Estelle sat next to Shelly leaning against the branch.

"What are you doing Shelly?" Estelle inquired smiling down at the girl before the smile faded taking a drag of the joint. Shelly looked up at her with a smile.

"No one likes me" Shelly whimpered sadly. Estelle nodded in understanding.

"They suck if they don't like you Shelly. You are perfect." Estelle shared kindly writing something in the snow.

"Children are afraid of me." Shelly shared as a tear fell from her eyes. Estelle nodded.

"Finn loves you. He adored you and he will always adore you. One day you'll have your own child and they'll be as perfect and as kind as you are. But if people don't like you then fuck them." Estelle stated simplistically taking a drag of her joint and blowing circles with her smoke.

"Where is Finn?" Shelly inquired.

"He's on a trip with my friend Ashley. I needed him away for a while. He can't see me like this. Don't worry Shelly if you ever need me I'm here. Your friend." Estelle whispered kissing her head and then she got up and walked out of the park to a coffee shop ordering a hot chocolate sitting there watching the man she saw flashing in her mind die by her hands not too long later. When the store closed Estelle followed the man out into the alley and walked up to him holding a knife clutching it tightly as she walked up to him holding a knife to his neck everything he spoke just blurred. It was like Estelle had found herself roofied and couldn't comprehend the world around her. Feeling the power of life and death in her hand she slit his throat the blood splattering all over her face Estelle moved away walking away from the scene back to the Godfrey house. There she saw Valerie sitting in her room. Estelle walked over sitting next to Valerie.

"You know I didn't get to come out." Valerie informed Estelle with a sad smile.

"SO?" Estelle asked coldly.

"Wow I thought we were best friends. Obviously I've been replaced by the no good for you Roman Godfrey. You know he's not a good person." Valerie deadpanned chuckling lightly.

"Neither am I." Estelle whispered playing with the blood on her hands. Valerie laughed lightly nodding.

"I know. I follow you all the time. See what you do. Why would you ever love a monster like that?" Valerie asked jealously.

"I don't love him. Not anymore." Estelle spat anger in her voice. Valerie howled with laughter.

"Yes you do. You know I would have loved you forever. I loved you. Who you used to be. I don't love you who've become." Valerie whispered kissing Estelle on the lips before disappearing. Later the next night Estelle was doing some light reading when she heard Olivia downstairs. Estelle climbed out of bed and walked to the railings lighting a cigarette looking down at the invaders.

"Any sign?" Olivia asked her companion as Estelle walked down the stairs. Olivia saw her and paused for a moment.

"Shelly is not here Olivia. If she ran away from you I think she's finally in the right frame of mind set." Estelle almost sneered taking a drag of her cigarette.

"Fucking shit you said she was here." Olivia scolded her companion.

"No I didn't." He rebuffed.

"Don't pull your shit with me. You are upset I'd be too I'd be pissed off. If my kid ran off taking care of her the way you did. Especially given how she's hanging around your fuck up son." The guy sneered making Estelle grab her gun and aim it at him.

"Get the fuck out before I call the fuck up son and he comes to fucking kill you two." Estelle simply stated with a sweet smile and Olivia looked at her with furrowed brows.

"Fine we should go. She really will pull the trigger these days." Olivia taunted walking out of the house with her friend. Estelle watched as they left and she walked away checking her phone seeing the photos Ashley put up on Facebook with her and Finn having a great time. Estelle smiled happily watching the two. Finn had been so happy. He looked so happy. Estelle wished she could be there. That she could love him and be kind to him like Ashley was at that moment. But Estelle knew the drugs she took weren't the problem it was her new addiction that would ruin Finn. She didn't want him to hate her.


	12. Chapter 12

A few nights later Roman stormed into the house going straight for a drink slamming the front door. He didn't know if he should have been angry at himself or regretful. He was conflicted. He'd truly cared about Annie. She was refreshing and kind and everything he wanted to be as an Upir but he ruined it. He ruined it all. He always ruined it. Roman cursed himself taking a drink from his glass and looked to see Estelle walk into the house not too long after drenched in blood. Roman smelt the air and closed his eyes trying to stop it. Looking her up and down. The blood was new running down her face staining her clothes and her hair probably under her fingernails but Estelle didn't seem to mind it. Her blue eyes seemed crowded. Crowded by an overbearing darkness Roman himself had seen so many times in the mirror. Roman had never really known what to do when it came to her. He didn't want to ruin her with everything he was, not unless she wanted it. Estelle noticed he was there and gave him an unsure blank look before turning away from him taking her shoes off. Roman watched her carefully. Her stiff movements and all in between.

"Hi Estelle." Roman greeted her softly his voice barely heard. Estelle turned over to him and walked over as he handed her a drink of vodka. She took a sip and nodded to him.

"I saw what happened." Estelle muttered with an earnest glance down.

"Of course you did." Roman sighed out moving away from her and Estelle looked over at him.

"I'm sorry" Estelle called out uncharacteristically. Roman looked back at her stopping holding a questioning gaze. "For pulling away." Estelle shortly explained walking up to him and stroking his arm slowly holding his piercing gaze. His pale blue meeting her icy blue. The blood covering her face Roman noted looked odd on her. As long as he'd known Estelle she dealt with her pain in extremes. The first time when her father left. She'd pushed everyone away running away to hang out with her trailer park friends. Nearly ended up in juvie until Roman got Olivia to bail her out. Then her first boyfriend, abusive towards her, she took it lying down until he beat up Roman. She's left with him driving her in her car. Crashed it into the wall. She was in a coma for a while and had to go through the pain of learning everything again. Then there was so many more times. Seems like not being able to have children hurt her deeply. She reminded Roman of who he used to be when he had a mental break. He wasn't to destroy everything he touched. Roman then reached out holding her face in his hands tilting it up.

"You don't have to apologise Estelle. I've done worse." Roman assured her thinking back to this night. He'd killed a human life. He was not sorry for it. In fact he revelled in the warm blood entering into his mouth. He liked it. But he liked Annie more than he liked the feeling of killing. Estelle touched the base of his neck stroking his jaw line tenderly.

"You wouldn't say that if you knew what I've been doing lately." Estelle informed him with a frown and her hands touched his temples showing all of her murder and new addictions. Roman's eyes rolled to the back of his head as he took note of Estelle's actions. Moving away from her he looked at her wide eyed and thought to himself she truly had become a monster. She was a killer, she was worse than him. But she hadn't enjoyed the killing like he had. Maybe they were equal.

"I guess we are both monsters huh?" Roman asked scoffing slightly he then held her hand and walked her up to her bathroom and took her jacket off slowly and placing it in the hamper. "You need to wash off this blood." Roman commented as Estelle took off her belt and nodded looking up at him her eyes pleadingly.

"I know" Estelle whispered. Roman then walked closer to her holding her shoulders calmly he then touched the side of her cheek brushing some of the blood away and then liking his thumb. "Can you stay?" Estelle asked him painfully. Roman nodded and kissed the top of her head and then he took his shoes off and socks off. He then took off her jumper placing it in the hamper.

"I'm always going to be here Stellar." Roman confirmed using the nickname he'd made for her when he was obsessed with stars and the sky. Stellar meant, outstanding, wonderful, better than everything else. It meant like a star. Because that's what she was to him. Blissfully brokenly fucked up and just beautifully wonderful.

Estelle smiled at him as he took off her shirt and placed it in the hamper before he took off his jumper and walked over to the shower turning it on the right temperature and he then moved back to her and he kissed her neck slowly licking the blood off her neck. Estelle tilted her head back her eyes blank and looking up at the sky light in the bathroom she had. Roman then removed her pants and underwear and bra throwing them in the hamper and following in suit both of them naked. He then moved some hair out of her face licking off some more blood from her face before taking her under the shower head. He then grabbed the sponge and washed the blood that clung to her back like a second skin. As he washed it off he saw some scars on her back. Probably from her first boyfriend he noted. Then a tattoo on her back. It was Celtic and long with beautifully cultivated patterns. Turning her around he began to wash down her body starting at her neck watching as the blood turned watery and was cleansed from her body. He noticed her tattoo under her breast down to her stomach and he traced it with his fingers and then his eyes scanned her face and he washed her face finally seeing her features.

Estelle's eyes strayed up meeting his own. Loving everything about him was a curse for her. She's loved his sandy brown hair, pale skin, his cheek bones, the way he either loved with his whole heart or hated with every fibre of his being. His blue eyes controlled her without ever really controlling her.

She'd known him since he was 2 years old. Back then she didn't even remember him. But she remembered him now. Her first memory of him was when they were 4. He was at his father's funeral. Estelle had walked up to him watching him not knowing what to do and what to say. Estelle had been afraid of boys. Mostly because they'd always left her. She remembered thinking all men left and JR was proof. He'd left and left his loved ones to deal with the mess. Estelle had seen the pain in his eyes. She wanted it to go away. She'd seen the pain in his blue eyes too big. She held his shoulders and pulled him close resting her forehead against his. Roman tried to pull away but hugged her feeling comfortable. The two had looked into each other's eyes and like that she was pulled away and Roman watched as she walked out of the room.

Estelle felt his forehead rest against hers and for a long moment it just felt like they were at peace. Like their sins were being washes away from the world. Roman pursed his lips looking at her. Her eyes were closed. She couldn't have looked more at peace with the world. Roman moved so that her face could be closer to his and his lips pressed against hers with an electrifying feeling. Estelle pulled him closer bringing him down to her height running her hands through his wet brown hair as their lips connected moving perfectly together and Estelle stopped moving her lips pulling away from him slowly and resting her forehead against his again before going to sit down in the shower. Roman then followed sitting next to her reaching out for her hand holding it tightly. Roman wrapped his arms around her holding her close to him.

"Talk to me Estelle." Roman softly ordered kissing the top of her head as the water cascaded down their bodies making them look a mess.

"I wanted to prove them wrong." Estelle finally got out and her eyes moved holding his hands out and looking at them playing with his hand.

"Who?" Roman asked her already knowing the answer slightly.

"My parents. I didn't have them in my life. They wanted to leave me. They didn't want to love me. I did so many things I wish I had done with them. I wanted them to teach me how to drive, not you. I wanted to show them my report cards, and watch their faces as they realised I was doing good. I wanted them to watch me at the school plays when I was a child so that they could be proud of what I was doing. I wanted them to take an interest in me. I didn't want them to leave me time and time again. I didn't want Jacob to leave with I was 9. I didn't want him to come back and knock my mother up again because he wanted a quick lay. I didn't want him to show up and ruin my life, make me thing he was staying. I wanted my mother to love Finn. He deserved love not hate. I wanted my mother to stay and be there for Finn and for me instead of thinking we'd be better off without her. We could have forgiven her. I had the capacity to forgive them." Estelle barely got out with silent tears falling from her eyes. Roman held her closer as he listened. He'd never be able to sympathise with her pain with parents. Never had he wanted or expected so much from his parents. But Estelle blindly wanted her parents to love her.

"You don't need them in your life." Roman tried kissing her temple closing his eyes as if he were kissing her lips. Estelle closed her eyes savouring the tears for someone else but she couldn't.

"I know…I just wanted a child and a family so bad to prove them wrong. I didn't need them my whole life but I still wish they were here. I wanted to prove to them that I could love my children better than anyone. That I could have the perfect family, a husband who loved me, a few children who I adored and protected with my life, I wanted it all. I knew I wouldn't need them for that because there is not one thing they could ever hope to teach me about how to love my family. I wanted so bad for that fantasy world to exist. But it got shattered a few months ago. I probably won't ever be able to conceive. I don't know how to get through this. Everything I've ever done in my life. It's all been in the hope of a family. I find out I can't have that. I always thought to myself why did so many bad people have the chance to have children while I can't. I couldn't even think of an answer. I wanted people to feel as bad as I did. I can't prove them wrong because I won't ever be able to." Estelle sobbed out clutching onto Roman as if her life depended on it and Roman held her back as strongly.

"You have proved them wrong Stellar. You've loved their son more than they ever could. You've been more of a mother to him than your mother ever could. You've been more of a father to him than your father ever could. He calls you his mother Estelle. You've proved them wrong." Roman convinced her and Estelle pressed her forehead against his and touched the side of his face kissing him softly and she then got up with Roman and he held her waist as he moved her against the wall kissing her moving his lips down to kiss her neck. Breathing softly Estelle held his hair and as he lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist holding him close and she touched his cheek softly looking him in the eye as he held her close to him. His hands moved her up as he brought her to his bed and placed her down in it slowly and he kissed her softly again. He entered inside of her rocking his hips slowly as she held onto him looking into his eyes as they made love. Breathing in as an intake of breath Roman brought his lips down kissing her feverishly. Roman then rolled to his back letting her go on top. Estelle rolled her hips back and forward passionately leaning down and kissing him before rolling to her side and after a few moments they were done. Roman held her close still in the same position as they were with they were intimate. Roman held the side of her face brushing some hair out of the way and kissing her softly and they rested their foreheads together. Roman's eyes studies her face and smiled to himself chuckling. He then wiped some sweat from her face. "I do love you Estelle." Roman assured her and Estelle's eyes went wide and she smiled.

"I love you Roman." Estelle whispered kissing his lips holding him falling to sleep. Upon waking up in the morning Estelle saw a note in her hand which Roman must have written explaining he'd be gone for a long while. Getting up Estelle took some pain medication before heading downstairs and going to the library reading some books. A few days after Estelle got out of her car abut to walk back into the Godfrey house when she saw Shelly walking out of the house. Estelle looked at her shocked. "Hey Shelly, what are you doing here?" Estelle asked Shelly and she shook her head.

"I needed advice from someone I trusted. Roman is too much like mum. Out of my way." Shelly ordered Estelle walking past Estelle who looked at her confused. Estelle stormed into the house walking over to where Roman was.

"Roman what the fuck is wrong with you?" Estelle asked him concerned for Shelly. Roman looked over at her and howled crazily with laughter.

"Oh so now I exist huh?" Roman yelled at her and Estelle narrowed her eyes at him.

"You always existed Roman you just chose the bitch you slept with over me. Honestly did you expect anything else?" Estelle asked him rhetorically.

"Oh well you really want to fucking know? I fucked my half-sister again. All she does is lie and destroy!" Roman yelled at her again his nostrils flaring. Estelle moved away for a moment looking up at him in fear.

"Like we are any different Roman. Like you are any different. That's what we do! We destroy every life we touch and we don't apologise for it!" Estelle called out back at him and Roman tried to push past her but Estelle grabbed his arm trying to drag him closer to her.

"What the fuck do you want from me?" Roman inquired shouting.

"I want you to calm down and don't you dare bring Shelly down with you." Estelle yelled back at him. Roman's face boiled up backhanding her roughly. Estelle stumbled back looking at him with hurt in her eyes. "Touch me again and I'll destroy you Roman. Fix things with Shelly before she hates you as much as she you hate Olivia." Estelle yelled at him running away to the kitchen as quickly as she could pouring herself a drink.


	13. Chapter 13

A while later someone rang the doorbell as Estelle was in the kitchen. Cocktail making. Roman went to answer it the two were pretending as if each other didn't exist. Roman answered the door giving a few words with whoever was there and walking away from the door the girl Annie following him in.

"Okay I want to explain first I owe it to you." Annie called out as Roman walked over to her taking a drink and then walking to the couches. "Roman please." At this Roman stopped and turned to her. Annie's eyes fell on Estelle who was smoking as she made some more drinks. "I came here looking for my mother, and I heard about you. SO I tracked you down and when I saw you I thought you were probably like me born with the caul. I had to be certain." Annie tried to explain herself. Roman wouldn't have it as he crossed his arms looking at her disappointed.

"Well you have your answer." Roman muttered out. "You had a million opportunities to tell me what was up and you didn't."

"I know I kept waiting for the right time. At the blood bank I wasn't thinking straight." Annie started before Roman interrupted his anger getting the better of him.

"Bullshit! You picked me up at a bar wearing a little black fuck me dress. Couldn't tear your eyes away from me getting my dick sucked and you followed me home." Roman spat at her.

"Okay yeah my feelings for you are complicated" Annie tried again.

"Seems pretty fucking straight forward if you ask me," Roman stated looking her in the eye fury evident. "Or was that all just part of your grieving process for your dead husband and kid?"

"Whatever happened between you and Letha and losing her like that and now Nadia I guess I thought you of all people might find it in your heart to forgive me." Annie barely got out trying hard not to cry. Roman stood up moving closer to her as Estelle watched sitting on the bench drunk out of her mind drinking a cocktail.

"Forgive you for what?" Roman asked not meeting her eyes.

"Being so thoughtless and selfish please Roman I'm sorry" Annie apologised bearing her heart and getting nothing in return.

"Is that it?" Roman asked her coldly. "Is that your apology?"

"From the bottom of my heart please I'm begging you I mean look at me I'm" Annie was interrupted trying to make amends.

"Enough!" Roman called out looking to the ground supressing his anger. "My strong sense is that begging isn't what your mouth does best." Roman put it simply touching her chin and turning away from her.

"The way you talk about our mother…her cruelty is that where you get yours?" Annie inquired trying to hurt him back. Roman turned back to her looking at her scorned.

"A shame, it's a shame." Roman shook his head walking forward towards her. "It's a shame you're my sister because that was some damn fine pussy." Roman breathed in Annie then grabbed his neck pushing him up against a wall.

"Is that what it takes to earn your forgiveness? Letting you fuck me?" Annie half yelled before Roman grabbed her arm shoving it away from his neck.

"It's a place to start." Roman stated grabbing her face looking to Estelle coldly and bringing Annie in for a rough kiss.

"You arrogant fucking prick." Annie yelled back at him before the two kissed again and Roman pushed her into the table. Annie then pushed him onto the couch and took his pants off beginning to fuck him and the two trying to strangle each other as they fucked. Estelle watched for a moment before taking LSD out of her pocket and taking some looking up at the roof it was moving. Estelle moved out of the house with bare feet and no jacket her eyes turning a foggy dark grey and she walked to an unknown place. A few days later Estelle walked into a bar and saw Peter and decided to sit next to him. Sitting next to him she nodded over at him.

"Estelle I assume Roman's kept you informed." Peter informed her kissing her cheek hugging her slowly and the two then split apart sitting next to each other. "Look I'm going to tell Destiny about what happened to Andres." Peter kept her informed as she got her drink and took a sip. Estelle nodded in understanding.

"I'll have your back Peter but you could lose her you know this right?" Estelle asked him carefully.

"I know. I know. Fucking Jesus I just need to do this right." Peter grit through his teeth. Estelle took his hand and help it softly.

"Don't worry Peter. Calm the fuck down." Estelle ordered softly getting up and walking out with him. Estelle then closed her eyes for a moment watching the board room at the White Tower with an assassin everyone was being shot over and over again but Pryce and Roman ducked down then Roman stood up and looked at the man who got a gun shooting himself in the head.

"I got something to take care of. I'll call if I need to." Peter assured her and she nodded walking away from him. Estelle then got in her car driving back to her 'home'. When she made it she walked up to the door getting her key out but turned around seeing Annie and nodding to her.

"Hi Annie right?" Estelle asked her as she walked in letting Annie in who nodded.

"Yes and you are?" Annie asked trying to put a name to a face. Annie had heard about everyone in Roman's life but she didn't know who the girl in front of her was.

"Estelle Tregetour." She introduced herself with a brilliant smile before she closed and locked the door. Annie looked Estelle up and down slightly shocked. From what she'd heard about Estelle from Roman she'd expect Estelle to be this amazingly beautiful, fierce and sunshine princess bleach blonde girl. Much to her surprise she just saw a gaunt, tired girl with big bags under her eyes and layers of clothes to hide the almost anorexic body.

"Oh…" Annie trailed off shocked. Estelle have a haunting chuckle before pouring herself a glass of wine.

"Stories don't match reality huh?" Estelle inquired having seen Annie's thoughts and past. Annie looked at her surprised.

"Seer?" Annie asked.

"Dark Seer, you know the messenger of death type. Have some wine. Roman usually comes back in a few minutes unless he's found someone to fuck." Estelle informed Annie handing her the wine and then walking upstairs to her bathroom taking a long bath. After a while Estelle was drying herself up getting dressed before she walked to her bedroom but heard Destiny downstairs. Estelle leaned over the railing watching.

"Tell me how Andre's body was found." Destiny demanded to know.

"How should I know?" Roman spat looking at her while Destiny had a cold look on her face as if she was about to go on a killing bender. Estelle recognised that look in herself.

"There's a guy in the sidewalk I don't think he's breathing." Destiny recounted in a croaked voice. Roman jittered for a moment.

"What did Peter tell you?" Roman demanded to know.

"It was you; you were the voice on the tape." Destiny realised.

"What did he say?" Roman yelled.

"Nothing he was covering your ass I figured it out all by myself." Destiny exclaimed resentment for her family very auditable. "What did this guy on the pavement who wasn't breathing look like?" Destiny asked making Roman look down clenching his jaw bringing his lips in while he walked away. "Did he look like Andres? Did you see who put the fucking bullet in the back of his head?" Destiny called out to him. "Was the reason Andres wasn't breathing because of you, you fucking piece of shit?"

"Fuck it and fuck you. Andres was too stupid to be allowed to live. All those people died because of him." Roman put it simply.

"Bullshit" Destiny denied.

"Have you seen that guy Chador? Why they closed down the warehouse? All of them dead because of Andres." Roman exclaimed trying to tell her the truth but love was blind to faults.

"Lies" Destiny denied.

"I didn't have anything to do with his death Peter did." Roman sold his friend out.

"No you're lying!" Destiny refused to listen yelling to Roman.

"He had no fucking choice it was that or more fucking people were gonna die!" Roman yelled out his voice easily overpowering Destiny's. "Peter was trying to protect you."

"I'm not fucking listening to you I fucking hate you" Destiny called out.

"Peter was worried for you and I was just trying to help him out. So don't you come into my house and walk all over me with your fuck you shoes and tell me what I did and didn't do to your low life piece of shit boyfriend." Roman grit through his teeth making Destiny lift her hand up punching Roman across the face. Roman moved his head back straight and spat out some blood onto the floor that had pooled in his mouth. Roman looked up dangerously at Destiny and punched her across the face making her fall back breaking her neck almost dead on his glass table. Annie then ran kneeling beside Annie looking up at Roman.

"Roman please we got to take her to a hospital." Annie begged as Roman stood there paralysed. As Annie begged him to call the hospital Roman bent down and grabbed the side of Destiny's face and snapped her neck dead. "How could you? Will you kill me too?" Annie called out to him. Roman then just stood there looking down at Destiny. Estelle wiped a tear that had escaped her eye. "The fire devours before him and around him tempest rages he summons the heavens above and the earth that may judge his people. Gather to be as consecrated people who made a covenant with me. By sacrifice and the heavens. Proclaim his righteousness for he is the god of justice." Annie spoke poetically as Roman looked down the guilt too hard to bear. Roman turned his head up feeling eyes on him and his eyes met Estelle's as she watched him carefully. After Annie left Estelle walked downstairs looking at the dead body and then back to him.

"I'll help you dig the hole." Estelle commented slowly making Roman look at him shocked. Estelle then walked away getting some shovels and shoes on and he then picked the body up getting it in the car. The two then drove off to the woods and Estelle was with him and handed him a shovel. The two did so in silence.

"Why are you helping me?" Roman asked her Estelle rolled her eyes and kept on digging not answering his question.

"You know he is going to kill you when he finds out." Estelle informed him.

"I know." Roman sighed out going back to work. Roman then walked away going to get the body. She'd felt it the horrible guilt. He'd never be able to come back from that because Peter would never forgive him. Roman brought Destiny over and placed her softly in the grave and looked down at her sadly. Roman found himself about to cry but then reached out for the ring on her finger and pocketed it. The two without a word began burying her. After they made it back to his home Estelle got her phone out calling Ashley.

"Hey Stellar we are in New York he loves it. When do you want me to come back?" Ashley asked Estelle who ran a hand through her hair.

"Not for a while. I just wanted to know how Finn was." Estelle inquired with a fond smile.

"Oh he's doing great. Really misses you keeps crying out for his mother and it couldn't be yours. I met that hot mess. Look not to be rude but how long do I have to keep running around while you play fuck buddy to your high school crush?" Ashley inquired bluntly. Estelle chuckled shaking her head.

"As far as I'm concerned I've never had sex with that asshole. Look just for a while longer I promise. I have to go. I'll see you soon." Estelle promised hanging up and leaning against the wall when she saw Peter walking up the sidewalk over to the house. Estelle took a drag of her newly lit cigarette looking over to him. "Peter" Estelle nodded walking behind him.

"Estelle, have you seen Destiny lately?" Peter asked worriedly. Estelle paused for a moment her mouth drying. Closing her eyes she saw Peter ripping at her throat as a wolf. Estelle's eyes opened and she shook her head.

"Only in my visons. I can't quite pin them down. I'll keep trying." Estelle assuringly lied to him. He then nodded and went to unlock the door.

"Thanks Estelle" Peter thanked her walking in with her following and looking to Annie with a nod. "Destiny didn't come home last night is she here?" Peter asked Roman closing the door looking over at Roman.

"I haven't seen her since the funeral." Roman lied leaning against the railing.

"Please excuse me sorry I have to leave so soon but I am late for an appointment" Annie tried to get out of there grabbing her belongings.

"What about you did she talk to you?" Peter asked her looking her in the eye making her pause in fear.

"No she didn't." Annie lied for Roman before walking out of the house.

"Destiny probably just needs some space after all of this. She'll turn up. I got something to show you." Roman informed Peter walking away with him and Peter then brought Estelle along with them. They sat around the table looking at something weird.

"This was in Trevor's head?" Peter asked.

"So was I" Roman informed Peter while Estelle looked at it touching it.

"You need to get a hobby." Estelle muttered looking at it closely.

"I saw all of it the cabin, Speivak everything," Roman informed them ignoring Estelle.

"This is big" Peter commented.

"We're so close. We should head over to the white tower and keep the pressure on them to find this place." Roman started.

"I not sure pressure is what they need right now Roman. Look I'll try see if I can find them for you." Estelle offered with a shrug. Peter looked up and touched her hand.

"Are you sure you can do that?" Peter asked her with his senses detecting something rotten with Estelle's power.

"I'm sure Peter." Estelle agreed.

"At the moment I can't do anything until I know if Destiny is alright. Work on those two please." Peter asked Estelle who nodded sternly.

"I think your being a little over-protective of her. This is the big break we've been waiting for." Roman commented not grasping everything.

"I won't be any use to us if I don't know she's okay." Peter started. "What happened to your hand?" Peter asked.

"Shooting in the board room I told you." Roman moved his hand away from the table quickly. "Destiny is a grown ass women what are you so worried about?" Roman almost scolded Peter.

"I'm worried that she went to the cops that they are keeping ice on her somewhere. Or they got to her and now Speivak is going after people, fuck knows what happened to her." Peter exclaimed.

"I see he hardly went after me alone once." Roman declared.

"If I do not have her under control she's going to be fucked." Peter self-hatingly let out.

"So if she'd planning on taking another run at this prick?" Roman questioned thinking about the ways he would use this to his advantage.

"Yep what am I supposed to do?" Peter shouted trying to figure something out. "Ring the doorbell and be like hey my cousin is trying to murder you again. In case you haven't taken her out already. " He spat leaning back in his chair.

"Peter don't worry I'll try and find her. I'll even get started on it. Keys?" Estelle asked and Peter threw her the keys to the apartment and Estelle walked away to the car and drove off finding herself at a bar already downing too many to think right. Annie walked over to her sitting in front of her looking at her as Estelle drank away at her drink.

"Why would you help him? I thought seers were good." Annie questioned getting to the point. Estelle howled with laughter shaking her head.

"Nah, we aren't. I should know. Came from a family of them each of them as fucked up and absent as the next. Just cause we can see shit and feel shit normal people can't doesn't mean we give a shit." Estelle answered laughing loudly finishing her drink.

"I've met your kind before over the years. They were nothing like you. Seems as the years go on your kind has lost hope. You were given the power to see past the truth to feel past the truth but that only made you afraid. Roman Godfrey is no good for you." Annie tried to warn Estelle who tilted her head amused.

"Says the girl who had known him for a few weeks. I've known him since before I could walk. I know he'll ruin me. Maybe I want that." Estelle stated with a straight face.

"You couldn't possible" Annie asked worried. Estelle paused for moment thinking about it. Did she ever really want Roman to destroy her?

"Maybe I do." Estelle bit back at Annie getting up leaving her with the bill. Walking outside she bent down vomiting on the ground and walking away back to her car closing her eyes her eyes turning a dark grey foggy colour and she touched the paper with the picture of the cabin trying to find it. Trying to connect to the mind of hope or the doctor. She then got a call from Peter sending her an address. Driving over to that she walked inside of the apartment and looked between them seeing Roman open his jaw insanely wide and Peter flash his eyes. "Wow I missed the introduction how sad." Estelle taunted walking further in waving over to him.

"Anything?" Peter asked.

"Not on Destiny but I did get something on Nadia. We'll talk later." Estelle assured them looking over to the man who was heaving and looked to them wide eyes as if he were about to cry.

"What, what the fuck are you?" the man exclaimed looking between Peter and Roman.

"You tell us everything we need to know and you'll never have to find out." Peter assured the man ready to give a beat down as Roman fixed his jaw moving it around.

"I never saw your cousin but I can help you find her." The man heaved out looking at Peter. Estelle looked over to Roman whose eyes were trained on Peter. He looked down to her and she shook her head stopping him from saying anything.

"I'll call Luca, he's the guy I had watching her, ever since she tried to stick a knife in me. You gotta keep tabs on your enemies if you wanna survive." The guy breathed out explaining it.

"If he makes one phone call he's crews gonna swat us." Roman grit through his teeth paranoid.

"I could take out your whole fucking organisation for what Andres did. But you convinced me to listen to reason. Don't throw that away on account of something I had nothing to do with." He called out with a raised voice.

"He's lying, he's lying" Roman repeated himself looking over to Peter.

"I don't know if you should trust him Peter." Estelle muttered sternly. Peter looked to them confused.

"Of course you are always on his side. You showed up with nothing. I need to find something out. We don't know he's lying." Peter stated going to untie the guy. Roman then threw his hand up stalking away as Estelle found a pack of cigarette and lit one.

"I didn't come here to get myself killed." Roman spat over-dramatically.

"Seriously a drama queen out of all of us you'll be fine the most." Estelle stated taking a drag and handing it to Roman who took a drag handing it back to her. Estelle then heard her phone go off. "I'll be back in a bit." Estelle patted Peter's shoulder before walking out into the hall. She heard Ashley crying on the other end. "Ashley what's going on?" Estelle asked worried for Finn.

"I just I don't know. I was taking a shower and when I got out someone had broken in and Finn he was gone. I am so sorry Estelle." Ashley called out and Estelle stopped what she was doing and cried out in pain as she saw Finn being taken by the crazy doctor flying lizard and bringing him next to Nadia the two holding each other. Estelle took a deep breath in.

"Ashley don't worry I think I know who stole him. Don't worry just come back here and I'll I promise I'll find him. It's okay. It's not your fault." Estelle called out and Ashley took deep breathing in.

"I'm so sorry." Ashley cried out.

"I have to go I'll call you back or text you. I promise." Estelle assured Ashley who cried even more. "Finn is going to be okay" Estelle comforted Ashley before hanging up and walking back in where Peter was beating the guy half to death. Estelle ran up to them and looked to Roman. "What the hell happened?"

"Destiny was shipped out of the county by this creep." Roman spat and Estelle frowned. Once Peter was done he went to sit down looking at the body. Estelle sat beside him holding onto him rubbing his back comforting him. Roman cleaned himself up before giving Peter a towel to do the same.

"I almost believed him." Peter muttered solemnly.

"He was a good liar but he got what he deserved." Roman shared his beliefs with Peter.

"Destiny is dead because of me." Peter whispered more to himself than anyone else. Feeling his anguish Estelle wished she could fix it.

"And she was at the woods told me these guys would bury her there." Roman added not making much sense. Peter then walked out of the room and Estelle looked up at him guilty.

"We have to tell him." Estelle tried to convince him sternly. Roman nodded holding her waist turning her towards him.

"We can't he'll kill us, or maybe just me." Roman cursed himself closing his eyes trying to stop feeling guilty for hurting Peter.

"I know I just wish we could fix his pain." Estelle muttered and Roman looked at her confused.

"Go back to being the cold bitch you used to be. It's better this way." Roman spat before following Peter out. Estelle took in a deep breath closing her eyes. She let the darkness of her power consume her again. She hadn't let it in for so long. Once she'd opened her eyes again she looked to the mirror she saw Meg shaking her head in disapproval before Estelle's eyes turned pitch black


	14. Chapter 14

Estelle walked out to the building with Peter and Roman before she got in her car driving home. After a while of being home Estelle screamed in frustration as she'd seen that he had Finn. Roman ran into her bedroom and looked at her with a grin but noticed she'd punched the mirror. "We found him" Roman cheered. Estelle looked over at him.

"He has Finn" Estelle whispered trying to hide her pain. Roman then gripped her shoulders tightly looking into her eyes intently.

"We'll find him. We'll get him and Nadia back to you safely. We have to." Roman promised her holding her face much more roughly than he'd ever done before. Estelle looked at him confused as his grip was tight on her face. Estelle moved him away.

"You are hurting me Roman. But thank you. Look Roman I'm just going to confront you about this. You say you love me and you to the opposite to someone who loves a person. You fucked your damn sister." Estelle confronted him standing a few steps away from him. Roman looked at her taken off guard and he then grabbed her shoulders shoving her against the wall his arms trapping her in.

"I love you Estelle. You just scare the fucking shit out of me. I was going to save this for when we were all done and shit but since you fucking hate me right now why the fuck not?" Roman exclaimed throwing his hands up in annoyance raising his voice and storming over to his bedside table pulling out a box. He then walked back to her trapping her against the wall with one hand holding the box in front of her face his breath on hers. "I love you and that's it. I like that you aren't perfect, I like that your body count probably exceeds mine and I love your brother. So marry me, fuck me, love me, it's your choice Estelle but you know just as well as I do we couldn't stop what's between us any more than we could stop trying to save our children from the big fucked up world. We could together." Roman gave his 'grand' speech pressing his forehead against Estelle's the two breathing each other in for a long moment. Estelle took the box from his fingers taking a longer moment as their foreheads rested on each other. Estelle moved away and Roman opened his eyes as she opened the box. A silver ring with silver and black diamonds were patterned around it. Estelle looked at the ring in awe before placing the ring on her finger and looked back up at Roman wrapping her legs around his waist holding him close and giving him a rough and passionate kiss and the two howled with laughter.

"Thank you Roman." Estelle whispered blissfully happy and he nodded laughing.

"Tonight keeps getting better and better." Roman stated as Estelle pushed him onto the bed stripping her clothes from her body and the two then fell into bed together making happy slightly intense rough love to each other. The next morning Estelle woke up alone and got dressed walking downstairs to see Roman and Peter there. "I know you well enough to know you are going to beat yourself up for this no matter what. But sooner or later you are going to have to find a way to live with the choice that you made. You can take comfort in the cocksucker did this to her…he isn't breathing anymore. You made him pay for what he did and that's a good thing. When we get her back here we'll find a proper place for her. Okay? Lay her to rest with the dignity and the respect that she deserves. Because right now Peter I need you to help me. Miranda, Nadia and now Finn. They all need you. Need us." Roman spoke with his voice breaking every step of the way. Peter got up slowly and Estelle ran for him holding him close to her. Hugging him tightly feeling sorry for the pain he'd gone through. Imagining herself what she'd be like if it was Finn. He was her rock the only thing to keep her from going the whole way down the dark rabbit hole of her true nature. Closing her eyes Estelle had a flash of him turning into a wolf and fighting with some guy killing him. Estelle moved away and kissed his cheek holding him close to her as Roman got something from his bag and they all walked out together. They then drove off to where the fucked up flying doctor was. When they got to the place they got out of the car and walked up to it with guns in their hands. "Give me your phone, just give it to me." Roman ordered taking the phone and doing something with it. Roman then when he was done with Peter's took Estelle's and did something with it. "I synced a GPS so we can find each other if we get separated." Roman informed them.

"Thank god." Estelle exclaimed bending down backwards slightly.

"I'll probably make sure that doesn't happen." Peter commented ad Roman started to walk forward.

"It still could. You have to be prepared for everything." Estelle explained to him as they walked off.

"I know. Just be careful. You don't have strength like we do." Peter stated concerned and Roman then moved over to Estelle resting his forehead on hers the two quickly taking a moment and then pulled away before they made it to the door. "That forehead thing is weird." Peter stated. Estelle chuckled as Roman looked inside of the house and they continued to the backdoor. Roman tried to open it but couldn't. Estelle then opened one of the doors and they walked in quietly and looked around at some of the shit he has.

"Oroborus" Roman remembered looking at the snake eating itself. "It has something to so with whatever Speivak is or it represents the end of the world." Roman commented looking down at Estelle who glared at him.

"I'm not a fortune teller." Estelle deadpanned reaching up touching the picture lightly getting glimpses of something she couldn't quite put together. Estelle turned her head seeing Miranda.

"Run" Miranda whispered shocked before disappearing. Estelle looked back to Roman and Peter who didn't seem to notice and her face went pale. Miranda was dead. Estelle they walked with Peter to the back as he opened the door and she followed in looking around noting he had slightly good taste. They kept looking around and then went back to Roman who was about to blow Peter's brains out.

"Jesus fucking Christ." Roman cursed on edged.

"The back rooms clear." Peter stated as they walked over to him.

"Where the fuck would he be?" Estelle questioned looking around down at the blocks seeing Nadia's name. They then walked to an upcoming stairwell.

"Why do I get the feeling this isn't a wine cellar?" Roman inquired.

"Because evil people drink hard liquor?" Estelle asked ironically following behind Peter. They then made it down and Roman turned the lights on crinkling up his nose at the smell and Estelle covered her nose. "Shit" Estelle cursed as they looked around at all this fucked up stuff.

"Jesus I think that's his nurse." Roman stated looking at the girl in the bathtub thing.

"What the fuck'd he do to her?" Peter breathed out as Estelle examined her face.

"It looks like the pictures I've seen in those um chemistry books where someone gets burnt or touched by acid. Must be really bad acid." Estelle muttered sternly kneeling down to look at it closer.

"Fuck" Peter could only come up with as the two boys searched the area while Estelle was trying to use her power to get an answer.

"Nothing" Roman sighed out.

"I guess they're not here." Peter sighed disappointed.

"Yeah we're right back to where we fucking started." Roman spat looking around. Estelle then looked at the water seeing something odd in it. Going to touch it Peter ran over to her grabbing her wrist forcing her up and away from the bath thing.

"Don't touch it you don't know what it is." Peter scolded her. Roman's phone then went off and he reached out answering it. He then began talking to someone on the other end.

"Estelle and Peter are here I'm putting you on loud speaker." Roman informed him placing the phone down.

"Speivak is a sulphur based life form Upir toxin is an extremely high concentration of nitro oxide it would cause an extremely robust reaction should the two substances come into contact. This toxin is your evolutionary advantage over competing spices. The reason you are able to wipe them out. We're going to need to extract the glands in your mouth." Pryce explained to all of them.

"Or I could just bite him." Roman suggested.

"Ever the man Roman Godfrey." Estelle muttered dryly leaning against the metal bench.

"Judging from his research in intersexual breeding you are probably going to be running into more than just Speivak" Pryce suggested.

"There is more of him?" Peter asked.

"If there aren't my guess is there soon will be." Pryce stated.

"Comfort is in the number of allies you have to fight by your side." Estelle shortly stated rubbing the back of her neck.

"Given that he is the female of his species he would need a female to over fertilise. The most plentiful and resilient are found in infants." Pryce trailed off as if realising something.

"Nadia, that's why he took her." Roman whimpered trudging off concerned. He brought his hand up to his face thinking about something or trying not to lash out.

"That would be a logical assumption. Roman I need you to get back to the lab so I can perform the procedure and start stock piling on arsenal." Pryce half ordered going into the mindset of war.

"We don't have time we need to keep looking." Roman scolded Pryce not happy about leaving his daughter to be hurt so easily.

"Well there is another action but you would need access to medical supplies." Pryce informed him and Estelle watched Roman worried.

"We have plenty around us." Estelle called out playing with the ring on her finger to keep herself from worrying.

"Well then let's just hope that Miss Tregetour and Mr Rumancek have a steady hand and can follow instructions." Pryce stated making Estelle and Peter look at each other wide eyed and then they looked up to Roman. Roman then laid down on the table as Peter held a syringe looking thing and Estelle held a scalpel.

"This is a bad idea." Peter muttered more to himself than to anyone else. Estelle looked up at him with a sigh.

"You're telling me." Estelle commented as Roman was holding his phone with Pryce on video chat.

"No argument from me." Roman muttered not liking it any more than anyone in that room Pryce included.

"Well it's not ideal for me either but here we are." Pryce muttered and Peter then shoved the needle in her hand before walking to the other side of Roman. Estelle glared at him and then looked back at Roman.

"Open up" Estelle ordered looking down at him having tied back her hair. Roman hesitantly opened his mouth and Estelle raised an eyebrow and he opened wider.

"Now I will need you to insert the soft tissue right next to the uvula." Pryce instructed her.

"What the hell is that?" Estelle asked looking at the phone screen.

"Really weren't you like in all the science AP classes?" Peter asked with his arms crossed and Estelle looked at him with a frown.

"I took AP chemistry and physics. Never once did I pass a biology class." Estelle exclaimed bitterly.

"It's the chronical posterior on the left of the soft pallet." Pryce tried to explain making Estelle's face drop.

"You must be fucking with me. Was that even English?" Estelle asked him shocked.

"A uvula it in your mind may look something like saggy balls." Pryce sighed obviously not impressed with her brains. Estelle laughed lightly as Roman and Peter cringed looking at her. Estelle chuckled and leaned down knowing where to put it.

"Should have led with that now you are talking my language." Estelle laughed out moving the needle into his mouth.

"Saggy balls is your language?" Peter snarked with a small smirk looking over to Roman sceptically and Estelle seemed to notice giving him a doting laugh.

"Now slide the syringe in a quarter of an inch anymore and you'll puncture the usestational" Pryce warned her making both Peter and Estelle look over to him.

"What happens if she does that?" Peter asked.

"Roman will be permanently deaf." Pryce deadpanned making Roman close his eyes mentally cringing.

"Great just fucking do it." Roman ordered. Estelle chuckled.

"It only gets better from here Roman." Estelle shrugged moving the needle into his mouth.

"You should feel a slight pop when you puncture the glandular sack" Pryce informed her as Estelle felt it and frowned.

"Shit" Estelle muttered.

"Did you feel it?" Pryce asked as Peter moved to get a better look at what was happening.

"How the fuck am I supposed to know?" Estelle asked.

"Well I need you to pull back on the plunger if it's yellow good if it's red I also have preparations to give Roman a hearing aid." Pryce stated not pleased about it.

"That isn't helping Pryce." Estelle muttered withdrawing the plunger and she then pulled it out and sighed noticing it was yellow Roman then moved his tongue around his mouth feeling weird.

"Are you okay?" Peter asked.

"Fan-fucking-tastic I just played operation with my fiancée." Roman growled out holding his hand up to his mouth making Estelle narrow her eyes at him. Estelle then handed Peter the needle and he put the yellow stuff in a vile.

"Fiancée?" Peter asked looking between the two but they then heard something move in the water making them all jump and look back.

"Something's in there I gotta call you back." Roman informed Pryce handing up and getting off the table as Peter and Estelle made their way to the water. Roman walked up as Peter got a net thing and picked up the thing that was in the water stuff and Roman jumped back making a weird noise holding his hand to his mouth. "Miranda" Roman gasped looking down at her shocked. Estelle's eyes went wide as she knelt down to the bath thing and flashes of her death rung clearly in her head. They then dragged the two out and Peter sat on the ground while Estelle sat on the table leaning against the wall and Roman leaned against the table.

"Bad things happen to the people who mean the most to us." Peter muttered sadly. "Ever wonder why that is?" Peter asked looking over to Roman who couldn't keep his eyes of the corpse. He then took a drag of his cigarette Peter did and sighed. "SO what are we supposed to do? Leave her like this?"

"There is nothing we can do for her right now." Roman stated solemnly.

"We just need to focus our goals on finding the children." Estelle tried to be the voice of reason but it came out numb and broken. Something then began to move and both the boys reached out grabbing their guns pointing it at the moving thing inside the body of one of the people.

"What the fuck is that?" Peter half yelled freaked out as Estelle slowly got her gun standing on the table looking over at it. Peter then went and took the sheet off the body and they saw some weird little thing run out and across the flood. Roman then ran after it ready to kill it but found a secret passage.

"It's a passage way come on." Roman urged them and Estelle jumped down tripping holding onto Peter and then running off with him behind her. They then walked into these massive tunnels and found the creature.

"See if the venom works." Estelle urged Peter to do and it got the bottle dropping a small amount on the thing. It screamed bursting into flames.

"That'll work" Roman shrugged as they walked down the tunnels.

"Where do you think this leads?" Peter asked.

"Nowhere it's a fucking dead end." Roman spat looking around.

"Come on there is a hatch." Estelle urged them climbing up the ladder with Roman and then Peter following. Opening it Estelle climbed out looking up to see a rocky mountain and loud waterfalls. Estelle walked to the ledge admiring the view she'd deem as beautiful. Roman then stood next to her with Peter walking next to him.

"Hey Roman, Estelle in case this goes wrong there is something I need to say." Peter shared with the two slightly brash and abrupt.

"What?" Roman asked.

"Everything that's happened, you two have always been there for me. You guys have my back. Thank you." Peter graciously spoke squinting his eyes looking between the two.

"We're family." Roman assured Peter grabbing his shoulder. "Hey it probably won't be a while but be my best man." Roman asked looking to Peter who laughed.

"Of course man I'd be fucking honoured." Peter accepted it.

"Also need you to give me away." Estelle added and Peter agreed.

"Man took you two long enough." Peter stated and Estelle then grabbed him and Roman having a group hug and she smiled.

"You are two of the best people I've ever met. I haven't seen your deaths yet so I hope I'm right in you two not dying." Estelle muttered before letting them go. They then walked into the building. They walked through the building with these massive blue tanks and screaming was echoed throughout the halls.

"This way it's coming from this way." Roman informed them running to the right of him.

"What the hell's going on?" Peter asked.

"Obviously nothing good." Estelle muttered following the boys slowly. They then saw this guy in the weird water and Peter tapped him.

"Hey" He called out making the guy in the water scream. "We're here to help okay? We're gonna help you." Peter assured the man going to get him out only ending up with the man screaming for his dear life.

"Pull him out and you'll rip his skin off." Roman stated. Estelle scrunched up her face walking closer to Peter.

"SO glad you stopped me from touching that shit." Estelle mustered the words up looking at him sympathetically.

"The thing that brought you here where is he?" Roman asked bending down looking at the man who was bawling his eyes out. "We're trying to get you out of here."

"Impossible it keeps me alive if I leave I am food." The man shivered with fear in his eyes.

"Did he have babies with him?" Peter asked.

"Babies? He'd got so many while I was swimming." He quaked.

"Where are they?" Roman asked insanely and if looks could kill his would. The man just kept spouting nonsense and crying. "Tell me where the fuck he is." Roman ordered.

"With Adam with Adam I am having the babies I am food for them" the man babbled and Estelle touched the back of his head her eyes turning pitch black making her show her head back looking for where he is. She noted at this time that every time she used her power, she let it in. She turned around quickly seeing the doctor man looking down at them as the man bursted out with little things flying out.

"Ah the miracle or birth" Speivak cheered as he said that Roman and Peter turned their guns up at him. "Is there anything more beautiful? Hello boys and girl" He greeted them leaning forward. "Persistent little buggers good for you." He cheered again walking down his walkway up there his hand sliding across the railings. "It's Peter right? And Estelle? I don't think we've been properly introduced. Godsend my names Arnold Speivak. You can call me ah it doesn't matter." He introduced himself holding his right hand over the left side of his chest in front of his heart continuing down the stairs. "Miranda spoke very highly of you three. No matter how hard I prodded you oh boy did I could never weirdly get her to pick a favourite between you three. So I would love to introduce you to the family. Roman alright couldn't have done this without you. Well more specifically you and that Godfrey blood line of yours holy macca all it's beautiful mutations you know two thousand tweaks of nurturing alone the way but finally a miracle." Speivak exclaimed holding his hands up as he walked past Roman who kept the gun aimed at him the whole time as he rounded the corner.

"Letha it was you, you made her pregnant." Peter accused Speivak making Estelle look away knowing shit would hit the fan.

"Listen I may have winked but I'm no angel." Speivak stated holding his hand up with his other hand on his hip. "But I must say I would have enjoyed" Speivak was cut off by Roman who didn't want Peter to know any more than Estelle did.

"Where's Nadia?" Roman asked quickly ready to shoot Speivak.

"Such wonder, such magnificence all around you as the life force is born to restore order in mayhem rescues our fair sister earth from her thug that eats ponder slashes and ass rapes her daily you are beholding that which will return her to her pristine jocundity and all you can think to say is 'Where's Nadia?" Speivak ranted questioningly like a crazy person not impressed with Roman's vocabulary.

"Answer the fucking question" Roman spat moving closer to Speivak. Speivak then pointed all around him with his index finger.

"This is the new Eden I'm the new Adam I'm calling these people back from the dead." Speivak ranted.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Peter questioned being fed up with the bullshit the crazy guy was feeding everyone.

"Todays an official holiday should be transmuted into flesh of my flesh blood of my blood she's being prepared for the feast. Only got the bugger Finn around because she doesn't kill around him. I'm gonna eat." Speivak informed everyone making Roman blow a cap.

"ENOUGH! Tell me where they are." Roman demanded.

"You'll be gone soon, Wolf-man and evil Seer too. Humans belong to us no more competing for food." He stated vaguely.

"Tell me" Roman ordered.

"Or what?" He asked.

"We'll kill them all." Roman threatened.

"Do it" Estelle ordered and Peter dropped the venom into the water killing the weird things.

"No" Speivak yelled out spitting acid at Peter who ducked falling to the ground the vile falling out of his hands and Estelle jumped down to grab it grabbing it in the nick of time while the crazy doctor ran off doing something. Peter got up pulling Estelle with him. Estelle poured the acid into all the pools while Peter ran off going to help Roman. Estelle made it over to them seeing Roman bite the weird doctor and he turned to a bat and died Roman then stood on the snake left and Roman stood by his side. They then ran up to where the children were and Estelle dashed for Finn picking him up clutching Finn desperately kissing the top of his head getting out of the place as with Roman, Peter and Nadia. Roman sat in the back with Estelle as Peter drove and the two were hugging their children.


	15. Chapter 15

The next day Estelle was sitting on the staircase smoking as Roman walked a nanny out of the house and he then turned back to then and Peter walked down sitting next to Estelle.

"Is her job going to be looking after Nadia and Finn or breast feeding you?" Peter asked as Estelle kicked him in the shins making him chuckle.

"I just want what is best for them besides I'm going to be married soon and I know she'll know if I cheat of her before I even do it." Roman stated looking over at Estelle who chuckled.

"Very true." Estelle teased laughing.

"How is Nadia and Finn?" Roman asked.

"Both of them are sleeping they were tired. I'll feed them when they wake up." Peter informed them nodding. "Are you sure you want to bring another stranger into this house?" Peter asked concerned.

"Us three aren't going to be able to keep our eyes on them 24/7 Peter. Finn is the easy one he can go off to day care or whatever but it's Nadia we have to keep quiet about." Roman stated.

"What are we supposed to do now? Move on like nothing happened?" Peter asked sadly. Estelle then snaked an arm around his shoulders leaning her head on his shoulder.

"It gets better Peter. I've seen it." Estelle whispered to him rubbing his back.

"Right now it doesn't feel like it." Peter muttered looking at Roman hurt.

"Look a lot of unimaginable awful shit went down but it's where it belongs in the past." Roman tried to help him.

"Yeah well if you find the reset button that turns off the pain let me know where it is." Peter mumbled getting up turning to go walk back up the stairs to his bedroom. Peter then took Finn and Nadia out. Roman then sat next to Estelle as they were lying on the couch. Roman had his arm wrapped around her comfortingly.

"It should be a small wedding. You know, Shelly, Peter, Pryce, Nadia, Finn and Ashley. Unless you have anyone to add?" Estelle asked looking up at him and Roman laughed shaking his head.

"No remember I'm the guy that has no friends." Roman laughed out making Estelle grin. She then leaned forward to him kissing him slowly and Roman's hands settled on her stomach rubbing up and down her midriff. Estelle them moved away going back to looking at her book she was reading for fun. Roman laughed looking down at her.

"I need you to make me a promise" Estelle almost begged and Roman nodded.

"Of course anything for you." Roman agreed and Estelle then straddled him holding onto the base of his neck.

"I've changed a lot since high school. My worlds been destroyed too many times. So promise me I'll never have to go a dinner or a morning without you, that you'll be there forever, you'll help me raise Finn and you'll love him like your own and I'll love Nadia like my own. That we'll dance and we'll fight but you'll never hurt me. Promise me the happily ever after we both deserve and we'll never tell our children of the lives we've taken. Promise me you'll always love me." Estelle begged him brushing his cheek with her thumb. Roman smiled up at her holding her face with his hands and pulling her closer to him their foreheads leaning against each other.

"I promise I'll always be there for dinner and the morning, that I'll be there forever, help you raise our children and love them as my own, that we'll dance, fight and I'll try to never hurt you that we'll be happily ever after and keep our indiscretions. I promise most of all I'll never stop loving you. You are the only one. It's always only been you." Roman confessed breathing her in and the two closed their eyes their foreheads meeting as they breathed each other in. Being like this, doing this with each other, it's the only time they'd ever truly felt safe. Estelle then went to give him a slow kiss and the two moved away from each other for a moment.

"I am pregnant." Estelle whispered and Roman's eyes darted up to meet hers and then he breathed in and out shocked and then he hugged her tightly their foreheads pressing against each other happily.

"I really fucking love you and I will really fucking love our baby." Roman told her with a wide grin lifting her shirt up kissing her stomach and the twos eyes met.

"I never thought I'd be given the chance they never said it wasn't 100% and it's a once in a life time chance Roman. Thank you. Thank you." Estelle cried out with tears falling from her face as she hugged Roman more tightly than she'd ever thought possible. Estelle then looked up at the time. "Finn's baby clothes are being delivered right about now I'll go sign for them and stuff I'll be back Roman." Estelle informed him laughing kissing him one more time before walking off outside to go and sign for them. She then was going back to walking inside when Roman walked out.

"I'm going to get some more blood. I'll see you soon." Roman whispered and kissed her again getting in his car driving off. Estelle's eyes then went black.

 _A girl was running her long blonde hair moving up and down as she sped as fast as she could down the streets of Hemlock Grove. Her long toned legs trying to run down the streets quickly. The girl she wasn't running from anything. Nothing behind her and nothing in front of her to chase. Unattractive sweat beads formed on her face making her hair stick to her skin or the shorter parts of it. The difference between the sweat and desperate tears pooling and escaping from her eyes couldn't be told as she ran. The night was casting down on her, the moon shining and the stars bright as ever. The blonde girl tripped falling against the rough pavement scraping herself bleeding from her arm and face. Looking around paralysed in fear the girl looked up seeing up the girl saw a white wolf snarling at a man who was screaming at the wolf. The wolf ducked his head down ripping out the heart of the man. The man's face revealed to be Roman and the girl to be Estelle. Nothing to recognise nothing to go by. All that could be heard in the night fall and tragedy was the wolf growling viciously and looking at her angrily before running away as the girl looked over to the man and screamed in anguish her cried filling the air. Getting to her feet falling over a few times she made it over to the man clutching him crying stroking his face. Her forehead leaning on his for a long moment her tears falling on his face. Desperation and cries of bargaining could be heard ad she rested her forehead on his. She wanted him back. Wanted him alive._

Estelle's eyes turned back to normal panic rising in her chest. Throwing on her jacket and the closest shoes she got into her car driving off for where she saw the two with the GPS. Estelle ran down the alley way and saw Roman there crying. Estelle ran over to him as he knelt down and she bent down wrapping her arms around him as he cried. He clutched her desperately and her eyes strayed to where Peter was lying dead and Estelle gasped standing up and looking to Roman who stood up looking at her his lips trembling before breaking down crying. Estelle held him close sitting on the ground as he cried into the nape of her neck. Estelle smoothed down his hair soothing him. "Why did you come here?" Roman cried out looking to Peter.

"I saw you die Roman. I saw you die. I couldn't watch you die. I could never let you die." Estelle cried out the tears falling as she scrunched up her face as the tears fell freely.

"I'm not dying. Not now not with our child coming. She should have stayed out of it. Annie told Peter what I did. She left you out of it." Roman confessed to Estelle crying in her arms. The pain and anguish inside never dying down.

"No" Estelle quivered out holding him closer than before.

"I didn't have a choice" Roman tried again and Estelle picked him up helping him to his feet and she pressed her forehead against his.

"I-I I know. I know. I know." Estelle whispered trying to convince herself it didn't happen. That this was all just some fucked up dream. Roman brushed the tears away from her face as Estelle buried her face into his chest crying loudly and she turned her head to the side looking at Peter. Roman stroked her hair softly just as terrified and ruined as she was. Roman's arms went around her waist holding her tightly as they took off driving to the hospital and Estelle waited outside holding her legs close to her body and she then walked into the room where Roman was and running over to him holding his bloodied hand pressing it against her forehead.

"You need to go home Estelle. The baby." Roman ordered her trying to keep calm. Estelle watched him worried but knew he was right and headed home shortly after and trying to fall asleep. The next morning Roman stormed into her bedroom and woke her up. "Annie has out kids she fucking has our kids." Roman yelled throwing something against the wall smashing it. Estelle shot up looking at him shocked.

"What! Finn oh god Nadia. We have to help them." Estelle exclaimed getting out of bed but Roman then held her arm stopping her from walking out of the room.

"I'll take care of this call me if she comes here." Roman ordered her storming out of the house. Estelle sat in the kitchen chewing at her fingernails wishing she could have a cigarette just about now. She sat in her bedroom from then on looking up at the roof waiting for something. Having enough of the bullshit of being trapped Estelle walked out of the house quickly and going to buy some food for her cravings. Estelle spent the whole day shopping and when she came home she packed everything up and turned around jumping when she saw Roman. "Do you think I'm like Olivia?" Roman demanded to know. Estelle walked over to him and touched his shoulder lovingly.

"You couldn't possibly. You do care about everyone; you want the best for so many people. I love you Roman Godfrey and I wouldn't agree to marry you unless I believed you were one of my favourite people." Estelle assured him kissing him slowly and he nodded grabbing a vase and throwing it against the wall.

"Look please be careful I promised I wouldn't hurt you." Roman explained to her before the two walked up to the bedroom and they slept in each other's arms. The next morning Estelle got a call from Roman and answered quickly. "Peter is alive, look be careful. I can't let you get hurt." Roman rushed quickly shocking Estelle she sat up getting out of her bed and got dressed.

"You too Roman. I have a bad feeling about this." Estelle commented hauntingly.

"I know. I love you" Roman shared rushed and he hung up in a haste before hanging up and Estelle then got dressed and ran downstairs. Estelle walked in the hoods following her powers to where she saw Peter in the distance getting food or something ready. Estelle walked up to him and he looked at her shocked.

"Estelle what are you doing here?" Peter asked her trying to keep her out of this.

"I saw it. I saw you kill Roman. Please don't hurt him." Estelle begged the pain showing on her face making Peter second guess himself.

"I can't. He's done too many bad things; he's killed so many people." Peter argued with her and she shook her head.

"So have I Peter. SO have I please I am going to marry him, we'll have a family, he's going to father my child. You can't kill him please." Estelle tried again her face scrunching up as she tried to convince Peter who wouldn't have it.

"You deserve better Estelle. Look he killed Destiny; I need to make sure he pays." Peter stated coldly looking at her as she cried.

"No, no you can't please no. Why do you want to destroy this family?" Estelle screamed at him desperately trying to hurt him but he grabbed her stopping her from doing anything bad.

"Estelle, Estelle stop. Look at what he'd done to you how he's changed you. When I first met you were this confident bitch of a girl who could have had everything she wanted. Now look at you, look what Roman did to you. You aren't you anymore. You are broken, crying all the time and without him we'll all be better," Peter explained to her raising his voice at her and Estelle pushed him away shocked.

"You told him he was family. Now you want to kill him. When does this cycle end? Please Peter if you do this to me you will never speak to me again. You will never come near those children again. Is that what you want?" Estelle asked her mouth opened agape and her eyes wide trying to find a way to stop him. Peter shook his head moving away.

"Yes it is. You are my family and I'm sorry it had to end this way but he isn't my family anymore. He destroys every life he touches. It ends with him Estelle. You don't realise it now but I'm doing you a favour. You don't love him. You refuse to admit the truth." Peter stated packing up his bag. Estelle shook her head refusing to admit that and she fell to the ground crying.

"I've known him since before I can remember Peter. I love him I love him I love him." Estelle repeated crying onto the ground as Peter watched her with sadness in his eyes as he turned and ran away from her. Estelle got up crawling to her feet before she ran back to the house. When she got there she looked around the house trying to find him desperately. Roman then walked into the house and ran forward wrapping his arms around her and she clutched onto him desperately. He then kissed her tenderly and leaned his forehead on her kissing her forehead.

"We are moving back into my old house. We'll start a family there; raise Finn and Nadia and our unborn child. We'll get married out in the yard come on quickly." Roman ushered her out of the house with her belongings and into the car driving off to the house. When they made it to the house Roman took her up to the bedroom they would live in and showed it to her and Estelle looked over at him with a grin jumping on him wrapping her legs around his waist kissing him all over his face making laugh and put her down.

"I love it Roman. Toast to one day right?" Estelle asked him breathing in heavily. Roman nodded moving some hair out of her face and kissing her softly.

"Toast to one day. Estelle in case Peter somehow gets the upper hand I'm going to tell you the moment I realised I was in love with you." Roman confessed to her and Estelle sat down looking at him nodding. He touched her face a few times before sitting down next to her. "It was the night after your father showed up knocking up your mother. You came to me you had some sort of mental breakdown and were ranting some bullshit I don't think you remember. You kept ranting about home much you hated them how much you wanted them to stoop being a factor in your life. I watched you try to kill yourself over it because you didn't want to be their disappointment because you always felt like you were because they weren't there to love you. You cried on my shoulder and I held you so tight I was afraid you'd fall out of my grasp. I don't know you just seemed right because it was the first time I saw how horrible your life was. I saw you were human. I felt like I was falling in love with you. I knew I was in love with you. Every day after that I wanted to love you. I wanted to tell you. I wanted to fight for you. But I couldn't because you were with your shithole boyfriend." Roman shared his story with her and Estelle felt the tears pooling in her eyes and falling silently down next cheek and she held his face pressing her forehead against his breathing him in as if it were the last time. "I can't remember loving anyone ever the way I love you. I'm sorry I brought this into your life." Roman confessed to her brushing the tear off her cheek and she nodded looking deeply into his blue eyed. He clenched his jaw trying to stop the tears from falling. His eyes were glassy. He'd never wanted to admit it but losing Estelle had always made him afraid. But he didn't want to hurt her. He should have run with their children as soon as he could. Touched her cheek being this close to her he didn't know if this would be their last time together or not.

"No one will ever compare to how I love you Roman. You are my hero." Estelle whispered kissing him for a short passionate moment and Roman grinned. He then helped her down and wrapped his arms around her as they fell asleep.


	16. Chapter 16

Later that night Estelle heard fighting going on and shot up quickly wiping the sweat from her forehead she noticed Roman wasn't there. Estelle heard crashing coming from the window breaking and Estelle bolted downstairs almost falling down the stairs. Stumbling outside Estelle paused for a short moment her face in horror as she saw Roman falling to the ground with Peter on top of him.

A hand went and covered her mouth. Her blue eyes saw as the glass covered his body and the blood pooled from his mouth. Estelle ran towards him her blonde hair moving up and down as she as she sped as fast as she could down the gravel road of the Godfrey road. Her long toned legs trying to reach him. To stop the events from happening. Unattractive sweat beads formed on her face as she ran towards him the sweat made her hair stick to her face. Tears fell freely from her eyes as she tried to reach him. She was desperate not to lose him. He was all she had. A rock came across her path making her fall face first into the ground scraping her whole body.

Looking up her worst nightmare since she was young she was living. The wolf got up as Roman spat some blood out coughing. She watched him as he cried talking to the wolf who snarled at him and the wolf ducked down ripping at his heart chewing on it and then walking away from the dead Roman. The wolf walked past Estelle snarling at her and running away. Estelle got up running towards him clutching his face desperately as Estelle screamed loudly anguish in her voice as the tears fell down with no one to stop them this time. She clutched his face and leaned her forehead on his stroking his face as her tears fell on his face falling and joining with his tears. She closed her eyes as she breathed in and out silently sobbing and lying down next to him crying on him. She couldn't stop this damn crying. She was going to marry him. Going to have a life. Just like that Peter took it away from her. He took it and he didn't apologise. She didn't move from his side as her sobs were the only thing that could be heard for miles and she fell asleep beside the man she'd loved so much.

 _Roman Godfrey looked around watching Estelle crying leaning her forehead on his. Roman felt his heart clench up tightly watching the love of his life crying on him. He didn't want this to be her life. It shouldn't have been her life. She deserved to be happy; she deserved to love someone to kindly that she'd never had to worry about the pain ever again. Roman knelt beside her noticing she'd cried herself to sleep and he brushed her hair softly kissing her forehead. "I'm sorry I am so sorry. I am so sorry for all of this Estelle. I am so sorry." Roman finally got out sobbing himself shaking with quiet sobs until he disappeared._

Estelle woke up to someone picking her up and placing her on a bed. Estelle's eyes looked around she then sat him getting up noticing that Roman was being taken away and she ran for him but a man held her back as she struggled against him. "No bring him back! Bring him back!" Estelle wailed out fighting her way until she was given a tranquiliser. Estelle woke up in a hospital bed and woke up to Shelly who smiled at her brushing some of her hair out of her face.

"I have Finn for you." Shelly offered but Estelle sat up shaking her head.

"I can't." Estelle whispered before sobbing with tears again for her dead lover the incident playing over and over again in her mind. Shelly watched her she'd never seen Estelle more broken and ruined than she was now.

"What's going to happen to her?" Shelly asked the doctor.

"She's suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, she also had multiple personality disorder and adding to the fact she is pregnant and just lost her future husband she'll be put into a psyche ward or maybe just have a therapist and live in a house. She needs time to heal. She watched something rip out the heart of the man she loved. She won't be good for a while. We'll call you give you updates." The doctors explained to Shelly who nodded watching Estelle cry on her bed before leaving the hospital and the town with Nadia, Finn and her boyfriend.

If she counted how many times she'd been asked what she did that day, what she'd eaten today, how her pregnancy was going, how she was going, what she'd done and if she took her medication she'd run out of numbers to count. It'd been 8 months since she had lost him. The pain didn't get any better. Estelle had lived in the big house Roman had gotten her. She'd been living here with Ashley who never left her side. Then her therapist came 3 times a day. Breakfast, lunch and dinner. 10, 2 and 6. Every day. They had told her routine would be good for her. Estelle was told she'd give birth early because of her stress. She'd almost lost her child. Roman's child. Ashley walked up next to her as Estelle was looking through Roman's clothes having found one of his jumpers that would actually fit her. Ashley walked in sitting beside Estelle and stroked her hair as Estelle cried onto Ashley's lap. "Estelle it's going to get better." Ashley tried to help for the millionth time. Estelle shook her head crying into the lap of Ashley trying to bury herself away from everything.

"Have you ever had your worse fear come true Ashley? If you haven't then you don't know what I'm going through." Estelle shakily spoke as the tears fell again and again. Ashley watched Estelle worried. She tried to remember the last moments when she saw Estelle happy and ready for the world. Then she remembered the only times she'd seen Estelle even close to that was when she was with Roman. Roman Godfrey was Estelle's life. He was her life and he was her bliss. Estelle then screamed out as something wet came across her pants and she looked to Ashley fearfully. "My water broke." Estelle cried out and Ashley's eyes widened as she got Estelle up and walked her to the car speeding off to the hospital. The whole time Estelle held onto Ashley's hand as she screamed out pushing her child out of her. A bunch of hours later Estelle had passed out from giving birth. When she woke up all Estelle could see was the ceiling. The medication she'd been taken. They'd suppressed her powers. She didn't have them anymore. Estelle turned and looked over to Ashley who was holding her child. Ashley walked over to Estelle and held the baby close to her.

"Your baby was born with a caul, they took it off don't worry. Um you have a beautiful baby boy." Ashley smiled looking over at her trying to hide her massive grin. Estelle nodded with a face devoid of emotion as she sat up Ashley gave her the beautiful baby boy. "I'll leave you two alone." Ashley shared being a good friend. She then walked out. Estelle didn't know what to do with the child. Just holding him. She found herself missing Finn. Wondering if he missed her. Estelle then brought the baby boy's face closer to hers pressing her forehead against his closing her eyes for a long moment before pulling away from him smiling for the first time in months.

"Roman Jr Godfrey. You are going to be loved. You are going to be so loved." Estelle whispered crying looking at her baby. The doctor then walked in and looked at her with a smile.

"DO we have a name for him?" She asked.

"Yes…Roman Jr Godfrey. He is Roman Godfrey's son. He died 8 months ago." Estelle whispered and she nodded going to write that down. Estelle then held the child close to her falling asleep with him in her arms. Upon release Estelle tracked Shelly down and walked to the apartment she lived in knocking on the door. When Shelly saw her she grinned and then looked down seeing the baby.

"He's beautiful" Shelly complimented the baby letting Estelle in.

"He should, he's just as beautiful as his father." Estelle spoke softly stroking his hair.

"Who is his father?" Shelly asked as she sat down on the couch.

"Roman," Estelle informed Shelly and Shelly looked at her shocked. "I came here for Finn and Nadia. She was Roman's child as well. I want them to be a family. Please." Estelle begged looking at Shelly her eyes Shelly had never seen her be so broken.

"Of course. We'll come and visit as often as we can." Shelly informed Estelle who nodded and she then took her children back to Hemlock Grove to the house she'd hated for so long. Estelle watched her children as all three of the were falling asleep and she smiled fondly. Hearing the floorboard creak behind her Estelle turned around and saw Peter there. Estelle moved away from the children and downstairs.

"You come to kill me?" Estelle asked him resentfully. Peter looked at her with a frown.

"No. I never would. I just came to see Nadia" Peter informed her. Estelle's eyes narrowed at him and she grabbed a vase smashing it against his body making him bleeding and on the ground. Estelle breathed in heavily looking down at him.

"As soon as I meet with Roman's lawyers to ready his will I am out of Hemlock Grove. I will get a restraining order from you and if you ever come near my house again near Nadia I will blow your brains all over the fucking linoleum." Estelle yelled at him. "You are a monster Peter you destroyed a family, you destroyed me! I trusted you; Roman trusted you and you turned everything to shit. I hate you and I hate everything you are. A fucked up gypsy boy. You were wrong. I loved him and you killed him. So fuck you Peter. Leave Peter and I won't make Nadia hate you forever. I won't rat you out to the police." Estelle yelled at him her tears angrily falling from her face. It was just how fucked up and human they all were. Roman, Peter, and Estelle they were all human before they were monsters. The hurt on Peter's face he'd thought he'd done something good. He was happy he did it. He didn't regret it. What he did regret was the look on Estelle's face when she saw him. The next day Estelle was in the babies' bedroom looking at the lawyer.

"He left you as CEO of his business and left all of his money to you and the children, Finn, Nadia and your unborn child. He has an office for you waiting in whichever city you wish just sign here and tell us where and we'll be good." The lawyer informed her and Estelle signed it and thought about it for a moment.

"New York." Estelle informed him and they had a few choice words before she began having everything packed and moved to a penthouse in New York. Walking into the new empty apartment she held her jacket close to her looking around and down at her children. "To Roman JR you'll never know your father, he'll never get to hold you but you are his, to Finn, my brother I am your mother always and forever I raised you and you are the first try I had at being a mother, To Nadia, I am not your mother, I am not related to you but you are my daughter, I will love you no matter the good and the bad you do." Estelle whispered kissing their foreheads before going to sit on the balcony taking a cigarette out and beginning to smoke it looking up at the lonesome sky to which she couldn't see the stars. She was done with stars. Done with it all. The medication she had. It had kept her sane.


End file.
